Timing is everything once in a while. Today I had a moment in which I was almost the best me I could have been and it was almost all due to the reading of Awareness recently. I had just finished it before that moment and have already doubled back to re-read it afterwards.
Appreciation:
There were a few moments today in which I felt I was living into my purpose. The satisfaction and joy felt during and after those experiences were priceless! Each day I’m tracking the happiness of my day on a scale of -2 to +2 to help me bring awareness to what really energizes me. The feeling of purpose has pushed today into a +2 day.
Presence:
I’m grateful for starting and ending each day with intentionality by reading my 2023 Plan. Those couple of moments of focus are helping me keep my most important goals top of mind by priming me mentally. Those focused moments of presence and intentionality have led me to increased presence with my family and friends.
Focus and process really take work. After wrapping up last year with a dose of Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport I’ve spent many moments pausing and catching myself as I turn to my phone and computer to allow me a distraction – usually without realizing I’m doing it until I catch myself in the act. Definitely more to work on, but I’m already seeing signs of progress. Awareness of the action is one of the most powerful ways to start to make the change.
Appreciation:
As I continue to prep for some of my upcoming author talks I’m continuing to be surprised a just how many stories and nuggets of wisdom I put into my book. Each time I dive in to find a story to use I end up finding about four or five that are on topic AND get distracted with another two or three future topics. Maybe it’s just me or maybe it’s a writing thing, but after I sent it off to print I actually felt kind of underwhelmed with the final project. I kept wondering if I put enough in or if I did justice to my time during the experience. Now I’m feeling much better about the finished project, these types of deep dives are helping me see that there is a lot worked into it. Funny how that works, isn’t it? I felt very confident about it until I shipped it, then I felt as if it weren’t good enough even though I had received very positive feedback, and it wasn’t until I started to really dive back into it almost six months later that I finally saw it as a solid work again. Definitely a good thing to remember before as I write my next ones.
Presence:
This has been one of the most scenic winters I can remember! This morning there was another fresh coating of snow in all the trees. My drive up to Winona was spectacular! So much snow in the early morning darkness causing the entire world to be awash in a black and white view. The colors of brake lights and traffic signs really popped due to their contrast with the black and white tones behind them.
When we use labels on others we see people only as the labels we put upon them. This mutes our ability to see them as their true selves. As an example, I saw Dad as “Dad.” As he lay in the hospital I was quickly introduced to Dad “the brother,” Dad “the friend,” and Dad “the church parishioner.” So many versions of Dad that I never really took time to see because I only saw him as “Dad.”
How often in life do I see only one facet or version of a person? How many times would my life and theirs both be enriched by seeing them in totality?
Definitely something for me to continue pondering and working through, the removal of the blinders of labels.
Appreciation:
Over the past couple of years I’ve witnessed such a circularity of leadership. Yesterday was my 23rd anniversary of joining Express and I’ve been asked several questions about my career which have had me waxing nostalgic. As I think back to where I began and then contrast to where I am there’ve been two very striking observations.
First – there’s still so much to learn, even after 23 years.
Second – the circle of leadership is incredible to see. Like many things in life it’s difficult to see it looking forward, the best views are when connecting the dots looking backwards. I’m finding myself having the same conversations but from the other side of the table this second time. So many excellent words of wisdom I’ve received from so many strong mentors in the past, their words now coming out of my mouth to help others. I am beyond honored to have the opportunity to share their wisdom and to pass along their legacy.
Presence:
There are so many nuggets intertwined into the stories in de Mello’s Awareness that I can’t help but be 100% present in the moment as I read the book. As I read it over and over again there’s more and more depth to be found within its pages. There are some pieces to thought provoking that I’ve learned to pause the book to truly be a sponge to the concepts. Here’s the one that caught me today:
“Pleasant experiences make life delightful. Painful experiences lead to growth. Pleasant experiences make life delightful, but they don’t lead to growth in themselves. What leads to growth is painful experiences. Suffering points out an area in which you have not yet grown, where you need to grow and be transformed and change. If you knew how to use that suffering, oh, how you would grow!”
Of all the different titles I read last year there was one I read four times in 2022. I thought it only fitting that it become my first book of 2023. Awareness by Anthony de Mello has been on e of the single most impactful books I’ve read in my entire life. Each re-reading brings a new found bit of wisdom to help me live a better live.
One of the many passages that resonated with me today was this:
It’s not that we fear the unknown. You cannot fear something that you do not know. Nobody is afraid of the unknown. What you really fear is the loss of the known.
Anthony de Mello
Appreciation:
I’m thankful for the many ways we all connect in our interests as a family. We each have our very unique interests and hobbies, but there’s some significant overlap on a macro level that helps us all find common ground even when we’re each interested in our own things. What really got me thinking about this today was the recommendation Dominic had for me in a documentary to watch while riding my bike trainer this morning. He knew I have a shared interest in the mountains, especially in the Himalayas, and hit a home run for me! I appreciate the overlap we have in our interests, especially as they relate to the appreciation of the outdoors and nature.
Presence:
In the office today I had a craving for a little snack. There was an excellent supply of candy and other sweet goodies available, all calling my name. One of the things I’m tracking in my 2023 plan is whether or not I cave in to temptation of sweets. I paused, took a deep breath, reminded myself that this was just a craving and not a hunger, and walked away. Those little wins feel so good!
So easy to start with big plans, to dream huge, and then suffer and crumble under the weight of too many big ideas. Frustrating to see a huge opportunity but have to break it into small components to build upon each other over an extended amount of time with slack built it.
Fun to try new things for a bit to see what works best. Difficult and pedestrian to do the same simple processes over and over again to get long term inertia going.
My ambitions are big, but my actions must be small and consistent. Slow and steady wins the race, consistency and grit will be the victors every time. Here’s to remembering this in the moments in which my eyes are bigger than my appetite!
Appreciation:
Today I had the opportunity to put a handful of hours into my writing practice and it is 100% because of the support of my family. The reason I am able to create space to do this is because of how hard they all pitch in to cover soon have the opportunity to chase this dream. I am thankful for all each of them did to allow me to stay focused.
I can’t imagine not having a family team like this to help support each other in all of our endeavors.
Presence:
There was a small and very unexpected moment today in which I was one hundred percent focused on the present. I hopped in the car to drive to yoga while Becky grabbed the last of her things to join me. I’m that moment I sat in the car with no radio on, no phone on me, and all alone. It was incredibly serene and peaceful and I enjoyed every second of it. Having a moment left with nothing but my thoughts was a wonderful bonus gift to get me in the mood for yoga.
With all the noise in life – most of it welcomed and positive – the moments of quiet can be profoundly soothing.
I’m wrapping up my 2022 reading list and have been very interested in the research project. Breaking down the total number of number of books read (112), the number of unique titles read (104), and the number of different genres read (business just edged out fiction and personal development).
Here’s the biggest thing I’ve learned from reviewing the data…. I read more books this year than in any single year of my life and all that diverse reading has resulted in many new ideas, living a more clear purpose, and more joy.
Appreciation:
The day is one like any of the other 364, yet it holds the potential and promise of a future unlike any of its brethren. A clean slate, a new calendar, unlimited opportunities. So much more magic than other days…
…yet truly no different than the rest. Each day is the first of the present and of the future. Each day of the other 364 holding all the same glittering opportunities of todays date.
Why do I treat them differently? How do I realize that each day is the beginning of the future, all starting in the present?
I’m grateful for realizing the folly of my thoughts and the opportunity to learn and grow as a result.
Presence:
My bed…. Ahh… nothing quite like the sensation of laying down in my own bed while blogging and getting ready to go to bed.
In reviewing my book one of the topics that has come up multiple times was remembering I’ll never understand where everyone else is coming from. The version of them I am seeing is a single perspective from my own view point, only a tiny percentage of all that encompasses them.
Appreciation:
This morning we spent a few hours as a family at the tubing hill near Mom’s. We enjoyed some quality time together outside, laughing – and occasionally screaming – together as a family while flying down the hill at crazy speeds. What an awesome holiday gift, creating memories together – and outside!
Presence:
My taste buds totally had the win for a moment of presence today. My brother ordered up an A5 Waygu filet for us to sample for our family get together. By far and away the best steak I’ve ever tasted in my entire life! So good!!! 🤤
When in doubt go for a run, or do yoga, or both. Seriously, how many of life’s challenges can be better dealt with after a run or yoga? Even if it is not what o want to do in the moment remember that I am a runner, I am a yoga practitioner, and I can create joy through those two activities.
Appreciation:
This might sound trivial, but I’m grateful for driving during the daylight hours. With travel for the holidays there’s a HUGE difference between driving in the dark versus in the sun. We were able to leave early in the afternoon and it made a tremendously positive impact in my mood today. Sunshine, very much underrated!
Presence:
As I work on marketing my book I’ve been spending time reviewing it to pull out stories to share on social media. I’m going through so many of those most difficult moments I’m still able to extract so many lessons from the memories. My presence in those moments, as painful as they were, allowed me an incredible opportunity to learn through those moments for years afterwards.
Funny how the world really helps to grind in the right message sometimes, isn’t it? It’s as if the universe knows we really need to learn something specific so it finds ways to repeat the message in many different formats until we really get it.
The message I’ve needed to hear again and again recently? It’s all about putting in the reps, consistent practice, and a systematic approach to getting it done.
Appreciation:
I’m very thankful for the way Becky and I tag in to help each other out when we’re swamped. Whether it is work or life causing bonus stress or putting additional demands on our time we seem to always find ways to help each other out. The past few weeks have been a great reminder for me of much easier life is for both of us thanks to that shared load. It made all the difference and helped me keep my sanity today!
Presence:
As I re-read my book to pull out stories and nuggets to share over the next months I was quickly lost in a state of flow. My mind went into overdrive as I extracted what will become my media content fit the next quarter.
What really caught my attention was just how many flow moments this book had created for me since I started outlining it on a flight to Seattle five and a half years ago! Diving this deep into the memories and mindset has been wildly more therapeutic than I ever imagined.
What a difference stillness can make in our lives.
With all of the busy-ness of the holidays be sure to create some space for yourself. Not time sitting in front of a screen, but actual space to have quiet and think.
Some of the greatest moments of healing I had after the death of Dad were when I took time to pause in silence with my thoughts. I found great joy and relief in talking with Dad, even though he wasn’t physically with me. One in particular still makes me chuckle when I think about it.
The day after Dad passed I was making the three hour drive up to northern Wisconsin to help make his funeral arrangements. As I drove I kept the radio off and was silent in thought. After a while I started talking to Dad, it helped me work out some thoughts and emotions.
As I was driving on the highway a sign warned me of a “Bump” up ahead. I was going a little fast so I slowed just a tad for the “Bump.” The “Bump” was more like a sudden three inch vertical that I was hurtling towards. My only reaction was to grimace I hit the “Bump” with a solid impact. Just like in a cartoon I was launched into the air and I swear I could feel when all four tires made contact with the pavement again.
After shaking the rust out of my neck I started laughing and looked to the passenger seat. Without taking time to realize Dad wasn’t really there I had tears of laughter streaming down my face and I said, “Dad? Seriously? We’ve got to talk about this guardian angel stuff! You really suck at it!” In that moment I swear I heard him laughing right along with me. What an awesome moment!
About a half an hour later I was about to crest a hill and I felt like tapping the brakes for some reason. There wasn’t anything wrong, no sign, or anything like that, but I felt compelled to slow down a bit. Just as I tapped my brakes a deer jumped out and crossed the road right in front of me. Had I not started slowing down beforehand I would have totally plowed into it.
“That was much better Dad! Thanks for having my back.”
Remember to create space for yourself this holiday season, take time to be still and think. Who knows, you may have an awesome moment waiting around the corner for you if you choose to pause and listen.
Appreciation:
Becky was asked to do a presentation on some of our travels and vacations. This evening we started pulling some ideas together for it and were blessed with an awesome bonus vacation – a trip down memory lane!
We cruised through so many pictures, vacation notes, and state parks maps in a little over an hour. What a wonderful gift to give ourselves, sharing the memories of past experiences!
Presence:
Running outside today felt borderline glorious! The weather has warmed way up without getting too hot and was in a very sweet spot. One other thing that I was very cognizant of that I really enjoyed was the feeling of running on snow. The steps all feel a little different, a little softer surface, and a little less stability. All in all it caused me to pay much closer attention ti each footfall this morning – forced presence!
Thankful for Forty 