Thankful for an Experiment, a Perfect Day, & Paradise 

Day 4,019

Growth:

Eleven years ago I started blogging to remind myself to be more thankful for all the ups and downs of life.  The goal was one year of daily blogging and it made such a positive impact on my life that I set the audacious goal of blogging every single day of my forties.

At done point the goal faded away, though the activity became a part of me, of who I am.  It is now do hardwired in me there is no goal, it has become a rewiring of my brain.  

At no point she I began did I see this becoming such cornerstone of my personal operating system, it was a short term goal to fix something.  Now it is just me.

Wild how little actions can have life changing impacts on our lives.  The most important part is setting the goal, the second is putting in the reps.  Today I’m grateful for a one year experiment I expected to realistically last a few months, that went for over a decade, and has now become a part of me!

Appreciation:

So many miles of hiking, so much outdoors time with Becky.  A perfect day to ease myself into my next decade.

Waking up after nine and a half hours of sleep without an alarm clock.  Enjoying a cup of coffee in campervan with Becky.  Happening to drive by an epic view of Sleeping Giant at golden hour with a little dawn fog on the lake.  A big cup of gas station coffee and a wonderfully scenic drive framed with autumn leaves, especially the fiery maples.  A view leading to a thought of “huh, I wonder if there’s a way to hike over there” that turns into the Presence section below.  Hunting for agates and rocks for hours on the shore.  Eating dinner in the campervan before 4:40, having a beer, and taking a quick nap.  FaceTime with the boys, relaxing and reading with Becky, and off to bed early (& being beaten there by an insanely worn out dog).

Great way to kick off a new half century!

Presence:

Getting off the beaten path, finding a trail hidden in plain sight about 10 miles off the highway.  Disappearing down a dirt road, parking at the dead end, and following what was quite possibly the most tattered trail sign ever.  A dirt trail overgrown with roots, rocks everywhere, and a couple of ropes to help up and down a sudden twenty foot tall mud and rock pile.  Rock hopping the end of the trail as you suddenly appear at the shore of Lake Superior, surrounded by giant basalt cliffs, forested islands, countless giant rock rock formations, and Isle Royale smiling at you from afar.

All alone. The only company being three mergansers in the lake, loons calling from far away, and two grouse caught in the act. 

A slice of heaven on Earth, a garden of Eden, tucked away to be discovered.

Thanks!!!

Thankful for Positivity, My Forties, & Ouimet Canyon

Day 4,018

Growth:

I’m so many ways this quote from Speaker for the Dead hits home today:

“No human being, when you understand his desires, is worthless. No one’s life is nothing. Even the most evil of men and women, if you understand their hearts, had some generous act that redeems them, at least a little, from their sins.”  Orson Scott Card, Speaker for the Dead

Today I was reminded of how easy it is to look at the life of another in a binary fashion – they were good or they were bad – when we know our own lives are across the spectrum of those two ends of the spectrum.

Throughout my life I’ve made mistakes, but I’d like to think I’ve made a more positive impact.  That said, if someone was to focus only on my biggest mistakes they would likely be accurate in saying I am a terrible person – and I would not be able to disagree if that was the only point to argue.  I would find it very unfair and would be so frustrated – “but what about all the good I did???” – why don’t you focus on that???

And then I realize that is what I do when I judge others.  I focus on only one or two key things.  Who am I to judge when I have not been in their shoes?  When I have not been their ugh their life?  When I don’t know the positives they have done?  How dare I judge?  What if my judging of them was the only thing someone judged me by?

Mike – remember to pause, remember there is always so much more to another person.  Do not judge – listen, love, help, support.  How much better will my fifties be if I lived this lesson?

Appreciation:

The last day of my forties being spent doing another ridiculous hike with Becky, a return to Nanabosho atop the chest of Sleeping Giant.  While it may have been a little longer than expected it was about as perfect of a way as possible to wave goodbye to my forties as I move on to the next stage.  We were outside for hours and hours, spent time talking and enjoying each other’s company while knocking out the miles.  So many stories remembered, some new ideas and adventures planned.  

Crazy to think of all that has happened in the past decade, so many positives, a many challenges, a lot of learning, and so much time shared with loved ones.  This decade of life has been one of the best, even the most difficult times led to more love, intentionality, and joy.  The memories made in this ten year span alone were a lifetime’s worth, so grateful for each of them.

The memories made who kicked off the big Four Oh had no idea how much there was to learn in life, how deep love could be, how full one’s heart could be.  I can only imagine and look forward to the big Five Oh and all I’ll continue to learn and grow through.

To my forties, thank you for working through the discomfort, for finding the power of gratitude, for intentionally living into what was most important.  Thank you for all of your beautiful stumbles and mistakes, your painful life lessons, and all the other events that helped shape me into who I am today.  May my next decade do you honor by continuing that journey, by continued learning, and by better closing the gap between who I am – who you grew me into – and who I should be.

Presence:

Standing atop a 300+ foot vertical drop down a rock cliff, looking over 400 feet across at an equally sizable drop.  The Ouimet Canyon did not disappoint, the sight of it shut off all in my brain except the focus on its beauty.  The views towards the end of the valley, the views of the cliff walls, the rock formations defying gravity and standing vigil over the canyon floor.  Everything in that view grabbed my attention and left me completely captivated!

Thanks!!!

Thankful for Road Tripping with Becky, Quotes from a Fav, and a Scenic Hike

Day 4,017

Growth:

Three quotes from The Alchemist really struck a chord today, so much so that I highlighted them in my copy of the book!

“He had to choose between something he’d become accustomed to and something he wanted to have.”

“It’s the simple things in life that are the most extraordinary; only wise men are able to understand them.”

“When each day is the same as the next , it’s because people fail to recognize the good things that happen in their lives every day the sun rises.”

Appreciation:

Road tripping with Becky has been a blast!  Early morning wake up for a seven plus mile hike in the fog and clouds.  Savoring the outdoor scenery together, helping each other notice the beauty surrounding us.  Making the same jokes, quoting the same old movies, and talking about everything and nothing.  Remembering past adventures, reliving old memories.  Creating new crazy dreams and plans.  Relaxing by the fire, enjoying the quiet calm of the evening as we both read.  An early bed and the repeating it all tomorrow.  Does it get any better than this???

Presence:

Hiking amongst the clouds surrounded by leaves changing colors.  The bright reds and oranges and yellows swirled in with the verdant greens, all slightly hazy due to the thick low laying fog.

Our hike this morning was a beauty, on of the better fall hikes I’ve done in quite some time.  Bean and Bear Lakes were both buried under too many clouds for us to see, but that seemed to make it all the more magical – while also providing a great reason to enjoy it again on a future hike!

Thanks!!!

Saturday, September 19

Day 4,010

Growth:

Similar to last night, every person climbs their own mountain.  What’s most important is intentionally choosing which mountain to climb. 

Choose the mountain, make the climb, adjust as needed, put in the reps to reach the summit. 

Appreciation:

So grateful for the time spent with my brother, talking, joking, philosophizing.  Seeing the similarities, sharing the stories, strengthening the bond between us.  Time for the two of us apart from the world, an opportunity to grow more firmly into the brothers we were meant to be. 

Presence:

Several moments of quiet bliss ascending the peak, thousand foot drops on either side, pelted by pellets of snow, buffered by the high velocity wind.  Total calm and peace in the quiet stillness of a soul at peace doing what it was meant to do, living in moments of awe and wonder.

Thanks!!!

Friday, September 18

Day 4,009

Growth:

Every person walks their own mountain.  

As I walked alone on the mountain today this quote rang through my soul.

“The secret of the mountain is that the mountains simply exist, as I do myself: the mountains exist simply, which I do not. The mountains have no “meaning,” they are meaning; the mountains are. The sun is round. I ring with life, and the mountains ring, and when I can hear it, there is a ringing that we share. I understand all this, not in my mind but in my heart, knowing how meaningless it is to try to capture what cannot be expressed, knowing that mere words will remain when I read it all again, another day.”  Peter Matthiessen, The Snow Leopard

As I basked in the majesty and the glory of the mountains around me I felt their simplicity, I heard their music.

Appreciation:

A day on the mountain, an experience shared with my brother, small doses of quiet time alone on the trails.  Time reflect.  An opportunity to take in the beauty of nature.  Such a wonderful day!

Presence:

So much of the day was spent in a state of awe and wonder, presence was almost always with me.  

The mountains, the golden colored aspen, the lakes, the wildlife, talking with my brother, the sensations in my legs, all of it led to an extended state of presence.  

Such an incredible day!

Thanks!!!

Thursday, September 17

Day 4,008

Growth:

We all face the same challenges, obstacles, and set backs – they are all just dressed up in slightly different costumes.  The actual things may be different, but the themes remain.  

Ego.  Money.  Purpose.  Relationships.  Expectations. Values.  Resilience.  Fear.  Opportunity.  Confidence.  And so many more.

It seems as if it is easier to treat each other with the love we all hope to receive when we pause and remember we all face the same through different experiences.

Appreciation:

One of my goals for the year was to go on eight shared mini-adventures.  There was no detail on distance, activity, or participants.  The intent was to live more fully into one of the things that really makes me me – sharing time with others in the outdoors.  This also challenged me to plan ahead and work with others as this was not something I could accomplish on my own, I needed others to buy into this concept with me.

Now, as I lay on my inflatable bed in the front of the campervan I can’t help but be grateful for putting this goal on paper.  It’s led to a few more adventures with loved ones, adventures likely not had if not for the goal.

Presence:

Finishing up making dinner, walking over to sit at the picnic table with my brother, only to find him staring in awe and wonder at the Colorado scenery surrounding us.  The slight smile, the eyes taking everything in, the glow of someone experiencing a moment of presence and joy.

Thanks!!!

Thankful for the Shores of Lake Superior

Day 4,016

Three weeks later and I am back to the shores of Lake Superior. The calming waters, so blue in the sun as we arrived before sunset. After supper we walked back there from our campsite, taking the photo above while pausing to appreciate the magnificent view and the reflection of the moon.

All around are the scents of the northwoods in fall, of leaves, of campfires stoked by firewood cut from pine. Interesting how the nose can start to figure out the different scents of smoke based on the wood on the fire.

The air is cool and the temperature is continuing to drop. Perfect sweatshirt weather.

Relaxing in the campervan as I wind down for an early bed, about to read for a bit to slow my mind. In the morning we’re back up and at it, heading out for an early morning hike before an entire day spent enjoying the area.

So grateful for one more trip up to Lake Superior this year, a little slice of heaven on Earth.

Thanks!!!

Thankful for Changed by Mistakes, the People Who Make Home Home, & the Highway

Day 4,015

Growth:

Well, I’m thinking this might be a little more common over the next few days as I read more and more of The Speaker for the Dead. There is no question that it is one of my all time favorites as I discussed yesterday. So many nuggets of wisdom, so many themes that wind slowly throughout.

This was one of the quotes that really stuck out to me today, a quote about giving oneself grace. This theme is interwoven throughout the entire novel in so many ways with so many characters. We’ve all made mistakes, have regrets for actions we’ve taken and actions we didn’t take when we should have.

This quote reminds me that the me who made those mistakes is not the me who is realizing that the mistakes were made, to remember to focus on the me who is here now, who is different, who is changed, as a result.


A strange thing happened then. The Speaker agreed with her that she had made a mistake that night, and she knew when he said the words that it was true, that his judgment was correct. And yet she felt strangely healed, as if simply speaking her mistake were enough to purge some of the pain of it. For the first time, then, she caught a glimpse of what the power of speaking might be. It wasn’t a matter of confession, penance, and absolution, like the priests offered. It was something else entirely. Telling the story of who she was, and then realizing that she was no longer the same person. That she had made a mistake, and the mistake had changed her, and now she would not make the mistake again because she had become someone else, someone less afraid, someone more compassionate.


If I’m not that frightened girl who heard her brother in desperate pain and dared not go to him, who am I? But the water flowing through the grillwork under the fence held no answers. Maybe she couldn’t know who she was today. Maybe it was enough to know that she was no longer who she was before.

Orson Scott Card, The Speaker for the Dead

Appreciation:

A full and productive day at work hot off the heels of a nonstop day of adulting had me worn out for sure. All good, a productive worn out, but worn down nonetheless.

Getting home to Becky back was awesome! We’re both pretty tired, but it just feels more like home when she’s here, no question.

At 6:15 the two of us hopped onto one of our twice a week family FaceTime sessions with the boys, the four of us all getting together even though we’re separated by about 16 hours of drive time. Those moments shared catching up with each other were amazing, though we’re far apart we’re able to stay connected. Many jokes, laughs, updates, and so on – so much love on the call.

Today I’m thankful for all of the people who help home feel like home, for the time shared with family to help re-energize and remind me of why I do all that I do.

Presence:

My morning drive was again the source of my presence inspiration today. The weather was just too perfect of a “driving in the morning while the sun is coming up and keep the music blasting while drinking my coffee” kind of weather!

With the windows down the cool air blew through the car, the fog intermittently hid and exposed the sun, providing a very intriguing combo of sunlight and dreary all at once.

I sang aloud to a little Audioslave (I am the Highway) and several different Rural Alberta Advantage bangers while occasionally pausing to drink coffee in the guitar solos.

All in the world was at peace, no stress, no worries, no looking ahead, no looking back, only the moment I was in as the highway laid out before me.

Thanks!!!

Thankful for Shifting, Adulting, & Life-ing

Day 4,014

Growth:


“And it’s true,” thought Valentine.  “I’m not the same person, really, from book to book, because each world changes who I am, even as I write down the story of the world.  And this world most of all.” 

Orson Scott Card, Speaker for the Dead

As I read Speaker for the Dead by Orson Scott Card for the seventh time this quote has resonated in my brain.

Each reading of this story adds depth, each reading uncovers previously missed concepts and connections. While the book remains the same, I continue to change, I see the path differently each time. Each reading shifts who I am a little.

Appreciation:

I’m typing this from bed, ready to crash and start all over again long before sunrise. I am exhausted.

The entire day has been spent adulting. Working, driving, and all the other “ings” related to being an adult. I’ve had about ten minutes of downtime except for my meals and a FaceTime with Becky.

I am exhausted, but also very fulfilled. I lived into purpose today. I busted my ass today. I got shit done today. I left it all on the field today.

That feeling of exhaustion after hitting it this hard is fantastic!

Presence:

My ride to work this morning was loaded with a playlist of some of my favorite music. The songs were not a collection of relentlessly optimistic and cheerful music, quite the opposite. There was frustration, longing, regret, time passing, heart ache, looking backwards, trying to figure out what really matters.

And somehow, I felt incredibly happy. Not happy in spite of the songs, but, in a strange way, because of them.

Driving along this morning, I realized I wasn’t listening to sadness and becoming sad. I was simply noticing how much there is to feel in a life. Love can hurt. People and moments pass. Roads take us away from places we once belonged. We carry scars from things that mattered. And that’s okay.

At one point I laughed at myself because my shuffle apparently decided that subtle emotional damage was the breakfast special. But underneath all of it was this surprising current of joy.

I’m here. Driving to work. Watching the morning pass outside the windshield. Listening to songs that remind me of all the beautiful, complicated, ridiculous things that come with being alive.

Maybe presence isn’t always about quieting everything down. Sometimes it’s turning the music up and realizing that sadness, joy, nostalgia, hope, heartbreak and gratitude can all ride in the same car.

Life is life. And this morning, I was really happy to be here for it.

Thanks!!!

Thankful for Admitting I am Tired, So Many Resources, & Choosing Presence

Day 4,013

Growth:

Sometimes the best thing we can do is take a deep breath, admit we are exhausted, and go to bed early to recharge. That’s the name of the game for me this evening. My mind is now mush, I need to get rested back up to be sure to bring forth the energy I need for a ridiculously busy day tomorrow!

Appreciation:

Today I was reminded of all of the resources at my disposal at work to help develop solutions to difficult challenges. From past notes and experiences to online resources to professional cohorts to AI to books to other digital resources there were so many ways I was able to pull my thoughts together to create a unique solution to a unique opportunity. The ability to utilize so many resources helped to engineer a huge win, one likely not possible without all the help!

Presence:

Realizing my brain was overloaded with too many thoughts rumbling through my brain at once, I took a pause. I closed my laptop, sat down, set a timer for five minutes, closed my eyes, and did nothing but breathe. Within a few breaths my mind was calm and still.

At every moment we have the opportunity to choose presence, to bring our focus intentionally into the present.

Thanks!!!