This morning I was working on a project with several team members. In the past I’d work very closely with everyone on a similar project to choreograph the entire event. In many ways I was working to drive the project forward. The results would be mixed and I’d feel a combination or stressed, exhausted, and frustration.
Today was very different. I gave a clear goal with loose direction. My teammates all were free to work on the project and adapt as they saw fit. Everything didn’t go as I had planned, it went much better! The feelings I had afterwards were joy, happiness, and positive.
What was really the difference? In many ways it was similar to what I’ve recently learned about writing. The more I push the worse I do. If I breathe, relax, and let go there is success. This doesn’t mean to simply relax and good things will happen, quite the opposite. I have to work hard to prepare and create the space necessary to let go and create. Time and energy must be spent focusing and clarifying the vision first in order to allow others to shine.
Today I’m thankful for some of the life lessons that transcend one discipline. In many ways they seem to be almost universal truths that can be applied to so many aspects of life. By taking time to pause, reflect, and think each day for this blog I seem to stumble upon more and more of them.
This morning started off with a pre-sunrise hike in the bluffs. While on the trails there were a couple of thoughts that stuck with me. Thanks to the quiet my brain was able to process things a bit differently and I was able to find a different level of clarity than in the noise of “real life.”
In a meeting with a team a quote was shared by a teammate. As it was read aloud my thoughts went back to backpacking in Isle Royale. A very specific moment in which the stillness provided an opportunity to see something clearly and to allow my brain and soul to take Altus appropriate action. Such a subtle yet meaningful moment which easily could have been missed due to the noise and busyness of normal life.
The first of these moments today was created specifically by being in the woods. The second was in the office but came from the woods. The peacefulness found in the woods continues to shape who I am, or, maybe more appropriately, the woods continues to show me who I could be.
While my soul longs for the solitude of the wilderness I’m contented by the regular visits it makes – whether in reality or memory. I’m grateful for the focus I’ve put on getting outside more this year, the impact of the fresh air has been amazing.
There are many items and things that remind me of certain people and events. Many of them sit on a shelf or are stored in a box. Quite often they are out of the way and I almost have to intentionally come across them. They are fantastic at reminding me of many wonderful moments, but they aren’t right in front of me often.
Some of my favorite memory related items are the ones I used on a regular basis. Even though they are in my periphery with stunning regularity the sight of them quickly transport my mind to another place and time. It seems as if they are even better than the other mementos and keepsakes as they are more regularly in my line of sight and usually have a dual purpose, some type of function as well as bringing back memories.
What I am grateful for today falls into the latter category. For a few years I had them stored off to the side as the first items. They didn’t quite match the rest of their kind so I kept them hidden away. Once in a while I’d stumble across them, chuckle, and then move on. Several months ago I came across them and a thought went through my brain. Who cares if they match, they are pretty dang awesome. Now I use at least one of them a few times each week… when I sneak a bowl of Frosted Flakes or have a salad at home.
Dad used to tell my brother and stories about the metal bowls his parents had when he was a kid. He’d explain how all their meals were served in them when he was growing up. For Easter they were transformed into their Easter baskets. Based on all the jokes Dad made Nick and I would joke the the only thing in his Easter bowl must have been a potato. It was a treat, a toy, a meal, and his only friend until he ate it.
We knew them well as Grandma would serve creamed corn or cream of chicken soup in them when we stayed at her house. They are made of stainless steel and there’s a magic to them I can’t explain. Everything tastes better in them. Maybe I’ve just eaten too many meals out of bowls made from the World War II era and they’ve impacted my faculties, or maybe it’s true that everything taste better in them. I know which way I’m leaning. 😉
After Dad passed his wife passed them on to my brother and I. They sat up above my cabinets collecting dust for a while and then I remembered that I hadn’t given any to Nick yet. Once I pulled them down I realized the treasure I was missing out on each time I used a bowl and transferred them to the regular cabinet.
The thing about the bowls I appreciate more than any other has nothing to do with their actual utility though. They help me to remember the smile Dad had on his face whenever we talked about those bowls. What a gift from the simple and ordinary use of a bowl, right?
When I go to the cupboard to grab a bowl there’s always a second when I pause and smile. First I see the stack of ordinary bowls that largely match. Then I look at the small stack of shiny bowls that have no right to be in the cabinet with the others based specifically by looks. I smile as I grab the metal one every time.
Holy Disney moment right here! I am typing this on the back deck with my legs up on another chair. As I was typing there was a loud fluttering sound as a little bird flew right over my head and landed on the chair my legs are on. It just sat there and cocked its head at me for a moment until I obviously bored it. How wild is that?
Yes, those are our boys in the front seats. Dominic is driving the used car we just picked up for the two of them to use through high school. On their first drive with it I moved to the backseat about halfway through so they could both get used to the seats they’ll be in often over the next few years.
What a wild time to pause and reflect on just how quickly they’ve grown. Seemingly only yesterday they were riding in infant car seats and now they fill up the front seats. How crazy is that? Such a milestone I never would have expected to have happen so soon.
Look closely and you’ll notice that the car has the latest in anti-theft devices… a stick and manual transmission 😉
Sometimes I get feedback I don’t want to hear. I may not want to hear it but I need to hear it. In those moments I am able to get a different perspective. Maybe it is something I’ve been avoiding, maybe it is something I hadn’t noticed, or maybe it was something I’d forgotten. Regardless, that feedback can make all the difference in the world.
What’s interesting is that I’m almost always grateful for that feedback, even if it makes me cringe. That feedback helps me grow and move forward so even when it hurts I know it is a positive. What I’m not always as grateful for as I should be is for the person who shared the feedback. sharing difficult feedback takes courage, guts, a desire to do the right thing, and love.
Today I’m grateful for someone who shared feedback with me that was needed and took some guts to share. I’m eternally thankful for their help and feedback today!
Something else that really hit home for me today was the importance of remembering to focus on the main thing. I’ve been making great progress on a short list of goals this year because I always keep them in front of me. In addition to those goals I need to remember to use that same laser like focus in all areas of my life. It is so easy to become distracted with complexity and adding on, but so often the most work gets done by focusing on the main thing. The reminder today will stick for quite a while!
What a day it has been! I was wheels up for Eau Claire by 4:45am and didn’t get back home until 6:15pm this evening. It was a long one, no question. That said, I’m thankful for busting my butt for an extended period of time today.
I don’t have many marathon days like this anymore. They seem to only come up in weeks like this when it’s already a short week,I’ve got another short week ahead of me, and I’ve got a handful of projects I’d like to wrap up. I often think of time like this as a sprint. There’s a finite starting and finish line. During that time it is 100% go time. It is exhausting but well worth the reward at the end of the finish line. Run hard, push through, and then enjoy the spoils of victory.
In this case the finish line is a long weekend of hiking in Colorado. That expo with the boys will be well worth the price of long days.
Yes, it is tiring and trying at times, but it also provides me an opportunity to focus on essentialism and efficiency. Through our most challenging times we often find our greatest rewards. I’m worn out today, but in a wonderful way, much like the muscle exhaustion after a great lifting session. Off to bed soon, wake up, run, and do it all over again. I’m ready!
Over the past month or so I’ve been listening to The Bible in a Year podcast on an almost daily basis. The past nine months have included a reading of The Daily Stoic most mornings. Over the past year I’ve read a book related to Buddhism, listened to podcasts from an atheist, spend time alone in quiet thought, and had many other moments of learning from a wide variety of other resources. What’s interesting to me is how much so many of them have in common at their core.
There is so much divisiveness in the medias – both news and social. So often it seems that people are more interested in pointing out why someone is wrong rather than listening to where they are coming from. Quick to judge, slow to listen, more talk than action.
What I’m grateful for today is the eclectic mix of resources I’ve been consuming over the past year or so. On listening to each there’ve been times when my disagreements in their beliefs were deepened as well as times when I saw the other side through a completely different light which made sense. Many times I’m left with more questions than answers and I can feel my mind twisting as it starts to maintain three or more opposing views at the same time. The strain is wild but so wonderful in a growth sort of way.
As I alluded to earlier there’s one thing more than any other that resonates louder than anything else…. their commonalities.
Be kind to others and the earth. Love one another as we wish to be loved.
Be humble and remember our tiny place for just a flash in the giant universe which lasts for eternity.
Be strong and courageous to do right in the world.
Be silent and still to hear our true voice.
Be love.
While we may argue and disagree about what largely amounts to semantics the five lessons above are universal. Living into them is the difficult part.
As I see more and more of the common ground I more clearly see the gap between who I am and who I am called to be. The gap is larger than I carr to admit, but with the other side in sight I can take one step at a time to get there.
Over the past few nights I’ve been very thankful for something that my younger self would have seen as being insanely lame… I’ve gone to bed way early! Not gonna lie, it’s been fantastic 🙂
With the boys out of town there’s not a lot of craziness in our house, no driving to be done, no chaos, less cooking, and so on. While I definitely miss the boys, one of the benefits has been the ability to go to bed really early without having any regrets about it. I’m particularly thankful for my sleep mask as well – it’s been very nice to slip on when the light through the curtains would normally keep me awake.
This evening after supper the clouds were dark to our north but there was no impending rain on the radar. Becky and I figured we’d take our chances and went out for a bonus walk with the dogs. The heat and busy-ness of life have slowed the number of evening walks we’ve had recently, getting outside to enjoy a little bonus fresh air was fantastic. Taking a walk after a meal always feels wonderful!
Speaking of supper, I’m grateful for Festival Foods’s meat department. They currently offer bison steaks and the bison strip has to be one of my all time favorite steaks to grill at home. Deelish!!!
Not too long after finishing this blog I’ll head off to bed. I’ve been spending a little extra time reading in bed each night to help quiet my brain down before I close my eyes. The read I’ve been chilling to lately is Discourses and Selected Readings by Epictetus. It’s the perfect thought provoking book to leave some deep last thoughts in my head before sleep.
First things first, isn’t it nice to have a Monday that feels like a Sunday? How wonderful to have a bonus day at home over the weekend. What’s funny is that I still spent more than a few hours on work during the weekend, but it felt so much better as it was something I was choosing to do rather feeling as I had to.
Late last week Mom called and asked what we had planned for the weekend. As luck would have it our schedules both lined up perfectly and she came down to hang out with Becky and I today. We spent the day hanging out at the house, heading out on the boat, and then went out for dinner before she started making the trek back up north.
I had such a great time just hanging out and catching up with Mom. Our schedules haven’t meshed up so well recently and this was so much better than a short phone call. We were able to shoot the bull, talk work and life, chill, think up future vacations, and joke around. Being able to do that in person and on the boat in the sun made it all the more perfect.
As busy as life is for all of us I’m more and more grateful for these times we have to chill and spend some quality time together. Having COVID firmly in the rearview also helps us see that this will quickly become more and more of the normal we’d been so used to in the past. Spending time together in person like this was amazingly awesome and I’m thankful for this extra time I had with her today!
Not from today, but a good one of the three of us 🙂
The morning started with sleeping in and feeling totally rested (before 7am). Becky and I took the dogs for a walk by the spillway before it got too hot for them. We then loaded up our bikes and went for an unexpectedly long bike ride to Trempealeau for a couple of hours.
Shower up, get a little done around the house, eat lunch, and head to a very quiet grocery store for our weekly shopping. Head home, get some work done that I’ve been looking forward to for a while, and then eat some supper of meats, cheeses, and crackers – the ultimate chill dinner.
Bust out some games for the two of us, joke around, and enjoy the deep state of chill.
Call it an early bed, type a blog, read a book for a little bit, and then asleep by 9pm before the fireworks start.
The entire day has been lived in a deep state of chill, exactly what I had hoped for on our first day of Becky being back home and the boys starting their next adventure.
I am also beyond thankful for finding someone who’s got a twisted sense of relaxing and chilling like me. I’m still not sure how I happened to find someone who so perfectly fits. To quote the romantic film Deadpool:
“We’re like two jigsaw pieces-weird curvy edges. Put them together and you can see the picture on top.”
Wade & Vanessa in Deadpool
Off to bed, a great night of sleep, and another chill day tomorrow!
Thankful for Forty 