Social distancing has made it pretty much impossible for the boys to have a sleepover with their friends. I figured they could still have one even while social distancing.

Instead of inviting friends it was the three of us (Becky joined us for a little while early on). We proceeded to do all of the things they would normally do on a sleepover including having chips and soda, playing video games, staying up late, watching a movie, and sleeping on the couches. It was AWESOME!!! So much fun and laughs were had while we just chilled and felt almost normal. Not only did they get a little extra fun, I got extra time with my boys which I always appreciate.

Another added benefit of the night was a little strange until I started putting my blog together mentally. I didn’t take any pictures of us last night so I thought back to one of my favorites, the one of the three of us on our way to New Zealand a few years ago. When I opened the photo album online I couldn’t help myself and started going through some of the pictures from that trip. I know I was just talking about it a few days ago, but I was again amazed at just how much we did in our short time there… and how much more there is for us to explore there in the future. Those bonus reminders of New Zealand brought back many great memories, a huge smile, and a little heartache for one of my three “homes”(La Crosse, Hilo, and New Zealand).

Thanks!!!

There has been much I’ve been grateful for today. I got everything almost everything done that I wanted to accomplish throughout the weekend already. I had time in the workshop with Gavin and time cooking with Dominic. At one point the boys were outside playing very well with each other and I enjoyed hearing them laugh. Earlier in the day I had a couple of the folks I follow on LinkedIn post some great thought provoking questions that got my brain rolling. While doing woodwork today almost everything went perfectly. Steve and Kathy dropped off more ramps for us for cooking. The sliders I made for supper turned out pretty tasty. So many moments of fun and smiles, time with family, time to create with my hands and brain, and time to just think.

As awesome as all that was there was something that took the cake this morning…

I woke up to Becky all bright eyed and bushy tailed telling me that the sun was out and it didn’t look like it was going to rain for a while. Last night I stayed up later than I normal and all I wanted was to rest my head on the pillow and close my eyes again. The smile she had on her face and the excitement in her voice helped me see that getting up and moving was definitely the right idea. So I did.

Next thing I knew our short bike ride to the grocery stored turned into an almost 20 mile spontaneous bike ride date. We let the boys sleep in and they didn’t even know we were gone. It was like a crazy combination of a date, our normal yoga Saturday mornings, and our morning run. Time with just the two of us, no real agenda, outside, enjoying the fresh air, and getting a little exercise? Yup, that’s totally a slice of heaven in my opinion.

I’m so thankful for the spontaneous bike ride date with Becky this morning, pretty sure it’s the biggest reason why the rest of the day went so awesomely!

Thanks!!!

After work today there was a list of things I wanted to get done. Always nice to get a jump start on the weekend by knocking items off the list early. Today there was an added benefit that made the work very enjoyable.

Back when I was a kid I remember helping my parents with chores and other stuff like cutting boughs, stacking logs, simple construction, staining lumber, and many other things along those lines. Many times I wasn’t super thrilled at the idea of having to work, but looking back I learned so much from that experience and I have many great memories of time with my parents while working.

The boys jumped in to help me on each task I took on today. Gavin helped with sanding and staining the boxes we’ve been making. Dominic cleaned the gutters with minimal assistance from Gavin and I. My power washing partner was Dominic. To help replace the garage service door brick molding Gavin was my wingman and helped pull all the nails. They both helped with cleaning up the work sites after.

I had a blast! Having their help was great, but even better was seeing them learn new tasks and spending time with them were the true highlights. It even seemed like they enjoyed the work! I’m blessed to have so much time with them and I’m deeply grateful for the opportunity to spend time working with them like this like I did when I was younger. It’s even better knowing that they might look back fondly on memories from today.

Thanks!!!

Over the past few weeks I’ve noticed just how often our family talks about our past trips and experiences. Maybe it’s always been like this and I just haven’t noticed, but it seems as if there isn’t a day that goes by without mention of something we experienced as a family while on a trip. Often it’s something related to wildlife, the scenery, or an activity, but it’s also a meal, a conversation, a cultural experience, and so on.

Tonight we spent time planning our backpacking trip to Isle Royale for Scouts next summer. On our Zoom call we talked about some of the specifics of the island and before I knew it I was lost in peaceful memories of our time on our “Fortress of Solitude.” There were so many memorable events and aspects of that place, the one that’s come up a few times recently was the moose who almost walked into us. It was a mind blowing experience that’s forever burned into my brain.

Becky showed me the picture that had rotated in as her laptop’s starting screen. Within milliseconds I knew the place; more importantly, I was mentally whisked away to New Zealand. We went into a couple of different glowworm caves while in Waitomo and the experience is forever etched into my brain and my heart. If you take a couple of minutes to watch the video above I can almost guarantee your jaw will drop at the beauty of these awesome cave dwellers. It was one of the most surreal experiences of my life.

There’s also a deeper and more personal reason that causes this memory to bring so much joy. While we were being slowly pulled by hand in a canoe in the dark and silence I was looking up at the glowing rock ceiling above my head. At one point I kept thinking to myself I wish Dad was here with me on this vacation, he would’ve loved this. In an instant I swear I heard his voice in my head, “I’m here, this is amazing.” I was glad the cave was so dark so no one could see the mist in my eyes. Whenever I see the glowworms I think of their beauty and I think of Dad.

Moose and glowworms… I’m so thankful for these experiences and even more grateful to have shared them with my family. They are excellent reminders for me to continue to live in the moment, experience wonderful things, create awesome memories, and share them with my loved ones for years to come as we continue to experience more.

Thanks!!!

Over four years ago I wrote a blog pos about a lesson learned from Dad.  We were working on a project many years before the post and he shared a little gratitude trick he practiced.  “Whenever you use a tool take a minute to think about who gave it to you, the projects you’ve worked on with it, and who worked on the project with you.”  It was Dad’s way of creating a habit of gratitude he would go on to practice most of his life.  To this day I take a brief second to stop and thing, to remember, and to be thankful when crafting with my tools.  If you want to check out the original post you can find it here: https://39yearsofthanksin365days.wordpress.com/2016/01/17/day-112-thankful-for-a-lesson-from-my-dad/

Just over two years ago I blogged about this lesson from Dad again, but with a subtle twist.  Instead of using it to think only about tools I used it to spend a moment of quiet thanks and reflection when receiving texts, messages, and other birthday and well wishes.  Not just a quick “that’s cool,” rather a thoughtful and purposeful moment of pause to think about my favorite memories with the person and be grateful for them.  This added so much extra joy to my heart and has become a practice I work to continue.  You can check that one out here: https://thankful4forty.com/2018/10/01/day-733-thankful-for-re-implementing-an-old-lesson-from-my-dad/

So here I am again with another added twist to this lesson in purposeful gratitude from Dad.  Last night as I blogged I had many thoughts going through my head.  My fingers never seem to keep up with my brain and I usually end up missing something I would’ve preferred to include in the original version.  When I hopped on LinkedIn this morning I saw something that brought on an instant face palm.  MARLENE!!!  Slap went my palm as it connected to my forehead… I knew I was forgetting something in my blog last night!

As I was writing about a difficult situation there was an awesome piece of advice I’d picked up from my friend Marlene Chism several years ago.  There was a specific phrase that has stuck with me ever since and it served its purpose wonderfully yesterday.  “Are you willing?”  The phrase reminds us that we all see a beautiful opportunity that we want to reach for (the island) but we also have to want it so bad that we are willing to fight the difficulties (the sharks) along the way.  “Are you willing?” is a beautiful way to determine if you are truly ready to pivot and attempt something truly difficult in order to reach your goal.  This great advice from Marlene came in especially handy yesterday and helped me bridge the balance of supportive AND demanding.

After I added a quick comment to LinkedIn I chuckled to myself and realized that Dad had done it again, in a way.  There are so many times when I hear the advice of others coming out of my mouth or rumbling through my head.  In almost each of those moments I can clearly see the face of the person who shared that advice with me.  When I thought of Marlene when she shared those words with me I immediately smiled form ear to ear.  I had flashbacks to some great phone calls we had when she took extra time to help coach and mentor me.  I remembered conversations about losing Dad, writing, and dreaming big.  The memories of her road trip to Winona and La Crosse and the drive up the Mississippi River made me smile even larger.  So many amazing interactions, advice, guidance, and friendship.  I’ve been things of her often and am so thankful for all she’s helped me with in the few short years we’ve known each other.

Taking Dad’s advice in a slightly different direction; what if I took time to be purposefully thankful for the people who shared wonderful ideas and concepts with me?  In many ways they are tools they’ve given me and tools we’ve built things with together.  What a beautiful way to continue to grow and cultivate my gratitude practice on a daily basis!

Even though he’s been gone for almost three years I’m so thankful for the advice, guidance, and lessons Dad gave in our time together.  Finding ways like this to continue to learn form him help keep him alive in me some I’ll forever be grateful for.

Thanks!!!

Over the past month and change my team and I have been reading 2-3 chapters of Grit by Angela Duckworth each week. We get together via Zoom, one team member presents the core concept and then we dive into a dialogue about how it applies to our lives (work and personal). This has been an awesome bonding experience for us while also helping us continue to live into one of our core values, Growth Mindset.

The chapters this week were related to parenting for Grit in our children. As Duckworth discussed this wasn’t just for parents, this was for coaches and anyone who cares for others. To help demonstrate the concept she showed a grid. The X axis was Undemanding to Demanding. The Y axis was Unsupportive to Supportive. In each of the quadrants created by the axis were different parent styles. What was found to be the ideal for fostering grit was a combination of Highly Supportive AND Highly Demanding.

This concept was very well timed for me today as there was a specific situation in which I had a choice to make. It would have been very easy to be highly supportive and not demanding. The person was in a tough place and it felt like pushing would have been very uncomfortable. That said, the right thing to do in the situation is exactly what would have been uncomfortable. If I truly cared about their future success I needed to be the voice that helped push them as opposed being permissive, allowing the cycle to continue, and the issue to persist. As I quickly though through what action would be best I saw this model in my head and made the right decision. Was it uncomfortable? Definitely! Was it what needed to happen and what needed to be said? Yes.

Something else that helped me down the right path when it would have been so effortless to take the easy way out were my core values. My team and I do our best each day to live into our four core values. Are we perfect every moment of each day? Nope. Do we take time to talk about our values and find how to better live them? Yes and often. Our four core values are rather simple yet complex: Grit, Growth Mindset, Gratitude, and Do Right. When we take time to think about our core values before taking action we always seem to make the best decision. When times are tough and there are multiple options our values are there to help guide us towards our vision. I’m so thankful for having this clear values burned into our brain as they help keep us on track so many times throughout the day.

Today there were some difficult decisions and situations. There were also many times the correct course of action was crystal clear when viewed through the lens of our values. Well timed ideas like Parenting for Grit Matrix also helped us out. Funny how when we live to our values everything becomes almost effortless as the right thing to do becomes so clear and bolsters our courage to do the right thing as we are doing it out of love.

Thanks!!!

My Monday mornings have included a standing appointment for several years now.  At 9am each Monday I have a call with one of my mentors & business partners, Norm.  The original purpose fo the call still holds.  This call is an opportunity for me to pause, think about everything going on in business, and then determine my most important projects to focus on for the week.

One of the things I appreciate the most about this time is the ability to walk through my thought processes out loud.  Funny how ideas sound one way when they’re in my head and a completely different way when they’re said aloud.  Norm does an excellent job of letting me walk through the thought completely and then bounces great idea, questions, and counterpoints back off of me to help me round out the thought.  By the time we’re wrapping up I’ve had the opportunity to think through the concept from a few different angles, go down a few seemingly different yet still related paths, and then re-focus for the week.

As we had our call today we had one of those moments when things were clicking well and his responses led me down a few different trains of thought than I was expecting.  While I was feverishly jotting down notes to retain I realized that there is another reason why I enjoy blogging so much.  In some ways writing a blog is very similar to thinking out loud.  When I start typing I have a general idea or two in my head.  Thinking as I type helps me get the thought out completely without overthinking and I often end up going in a slightly different direction than when I started.  The act of writing helps me flesh out the thought and see it differently.  Having the written thought process afterwards is a wonderful resource for me to review further down the road.  My blog post from yesterday about failing was a great example of that.  Blogging daily provides the opportunity for me to think out loud on my own without anyone listening, yet while allowing others to listen in and offer advice and ideas… and it’s saved for me to go back to when I need it. It’s a little gift I’m giving myself both now and in the future.

Thanks!!!

I know there’s a pretty significant chance someone slaps me for this one, but I am thankful for the rainy Sunday we’ve had so far. The weather we’ve had recently has been pretty outstanding and there’s been a lot of sun. One day of gloomy, overcast skies and continual rain is very peaceful and was an excellent reminder for me to slow down and relax. Everything seems a little more chill today. The change in lighting is beautiful as well. The purple blooming lilacs in our neighbor’s backyard really pop against the steel gray sky. The grass seems even more green than normal. The lighting has been soothing. Today I’m just soaking in the feeling of the rainy day and enjoying the sweatshirt weather.

What a perfect day to spend some time up in my workshop! While I was up there Dominic finished the last flower box for the deck for Becky while Gavin and I made a sled for my table saw. Each of us were focused on the task at hand while occasionally talking or asking each other for tools. The time up there creating was fantastic as always.

After a while the boys had other things to do so I was up there on my own. There’s a project I am working on for some of my friends and I got to work on the next step of it. I had a specific plan in mind but opted to change part of the execution of it to both look nicer and add strength to it. In order for me to do this I had to build a box joint jig, something I’ve never done before. I was both excited to try it and nervous as I figured it would be a little tough to learn.

As I put the jig together and started making adjustments I had failure after failure after failure. The saw blade was too high. The pin was the wrong size. I started cutting the board in the wrong place. The pin was too far left. The pin was too far right. The pin was too far left again. Trial and error, trial and error, over and over again. The funny thing is that I’d often get frustrated at this. Sometimes I’ll get frustrated to the point of swearing. Other times I’ll get discouraged and switch to something different for a while. Today I was totally chill and even smiling while failing.

Each time I made a mistake I thought to myself, “One failure closer to success.” I would make a mistake and that mantra would go through my head, over and over again. One failure closer to success. One failure closer to success. I knew I would ultimately be successful at it, I would persist until I had completed the task. I was open minded to trying new things, I was confident in may ability to learn, and I knew each failure was teaching me something. One failure closer to success…

After a pile of failures guess what happened? I figured it out! It was kind of funny, while I was happy to have success I immediately moved on to the next challenge. After a while I realized that I hadn’t really paused to celebrate the hard fought success and I started wondering why. That’s when it hit me – I always knew I would be successful at it, it was only a matter of time. I knew resilience and growth mindset would win out, each failure was a lesson to help me grow, and I would be successful eventually. No need to get pumped and excited, it was all part of the process.

This project is going to stick with me for a while. The next times I run into a challenge I’m going to remind myself of this project and how I attacked it. I’m going to remember the mindset I chose while learning the new task and will remember that each failure is one step closer to success. Today I’m so thankful for the excellent reminder of each failure moving me one step closer to success – as long as I choose the right attitude. Confidence, willingness to learn from mistakes, resilience, growth mindset, and flexibility.

Thanks!!!

There were a handful for more deep and profound thoughts I was going to write about tonight. Lessons remembered on decision making, purpose, and role models. I might write about the in the future, but as I sit here on the couch and blog I’m still smiling wide after playing Horse with Gavin.

Funny how sometimes life gets so complex and confusing, or at least that’s how I make it. Stressing about things out of my control, taking on too many challenges at once, spreading my attention to thin, and so on. I so easily let it turn into a go, go, go mindset and next thing I know I’ve spent several days of the little precious time I have in a rush and blur of activity. Not only that, but once I accomplish something I want to accomplish something bigger.

Tonight Becky was online with her friends talking and Dominic hopped online with his buddies to play some games. I asked Gavin what he wanted to do and he wanted to shoot some hoops. Outside we went on a perfect May evening in La Crosse. At the end of our driveway we goofed around, played some basketball, and had an awesome time hanging out. As I kept smiling to myself after we played I realized some of the reason why I enjoyed it so much. I was hanging out with one of my favorite people in the world. We were outside and not distracted by anything except occasionally noticing just how perfectly clear the sky was and how perfectly we could view the bluffs in Holmen from our house. It was the two of us, no devices or phones, just us hanging out spending time together. It was a simple game to play and we were both 100% present in it. Our time together was simple, fun, and memorable in its perfectness.

All the big thoughts and ideas will have their day some other time. Tonight I’m thankful for playing Horse with Gavin and enjoying some of the simple things in life.

Thanks!!!