The elephant is a massive and incredibly strong beast. It grows to over ten feet tall, weighs over six tons, and can carry almost one ton on their backs.  Talk about your immovable object and irresistible force all rolled into one!  That said, the elephant likes routine and consistency, it does not like change.

On top of the elephant is the rider.  The rider knows where he wants to go, where the elephant should go, and should be in charge.  However, at 225 pounds and 6’2″ the rider really has little control over the elephant.  All the rider can do is try to show the elephant the path to follow and coax it to go that way.

The elephant has the muscle and the force to make things happen, and the rider knows what the best thing to do is.  If working in tandem they are unstoppable, but out of sync it’s a disaster.

Several years ago I first learned that analogy of the elephant and the rider from the wonderful Dan & Chip Heath book Switch.  If you’d love an interesting read discussing how to change habits, be sure to check it out.

So why am I thankful for the elephant and the rider today?  Knowing the schedule I had there was only one way to get my run in before work…  Wake up at about 4:30am.  When the alarm went off and Becky shot up out of bed as normal, I just laid there for a moment.  The rider stood up, and then the elephant laid back down.  The rider stood back up, took a couple of steps, and then the elephant crashed back into the bed.  The rider then got up and told Becky that he was going to run, but then the elephant quickly staggered around, came up with excuses, and laid back down – taking LuLu back to bed to snuggle and keep it warm and help it go back to sleep.

In desperation the rider threw a Hail Mary and said, “if LuLu goes for a run, I’m going for a run.”  The elephant grunted and knew that LuLu would stay in bed.  Lo and behold, LuLu jumped out of bed like a flash.  The elephant wanted to stick with its herd so it arose as well.  The rider smiled knowing that it had just helped the elephant see the right path.

Becky, Skywalker, LuLu, and the elephant/rider went for their morning run and it felt WONDERFUL!!!

We all have the elephant AND the rider in us all the time.  Sometimes we want to change the path, change the habit, and go the new direction the rider can see, but then elephant stays on the path that it knows, keeps its normal pace, and does its best to ignore the riders voice.  While the elephant is powerful, the rider is smarter and can make incredible things happen if given the tools to beat the elephant.  When I make changes I often think of this analogy and watch for all the ways the elephant is trying to go back to its old ways.  Sometimes the rider wins, sometimes the elephant wins.

Today I’m thankful that the rider won.

Thanks!!!

There are some days in which I sit down to blog and it takes a while to figure it out.  Over the course of the day there are so many things to be thankful for that being thankful for just one doesn’t quite seem right.  After a day like that I try to find the theme, the link from one to another, the common ground that most of them are founded on.  Sometimes there is a theme tying it all together, and sometimes there’s not.  Today is one of those days when it all fit…

Everything just clicked today.  From the moment I woke up until now as I blog, everything has fallen into place and gone pretty smooth.  It’s amazing to me that it’s gone as well as it has.  There’s been so much packed into this one day, and it all either went just as planned or at least really close.

Dominic had a couple of games to referee this morning so I woke up early (as Becky did the day before), let the dogs out, fed them, got some work done on my laptop, and got Dominic off to the soccer fields.  Once I got home I grabbed my computer and banged out the rest of what I needed to get done for work this weekend.  Gavin got up and read on the couch as I typed up emails, he kept good and quiet so Becky could sleep yet.  While he was quiet, it was also comforting to have him in the room with me, it just felt right.

After a while he headed out to the garage with me and helped me clean the car.  It was in desperate need of a deep clean and he did a great job of helping with whatever tasks I asked him to do (the deal was that he got to keep all the change that he found).  We had a goal, we got it done, and we had fun working together.

Dominic’s games were done early so Gavin rode with me to pick him up.  Once we got home there was a little more cleaning followed by an awesome lunch of chili that Becky made us – the perfect food for a cold dreary day like this.  Lunch as a family was peaceful and just seemed right.

Then we went back outside and Dominic cleaned the Pilot while I worked on my workshop.  Becky and I also wanted to sneak in a longer run today so I knew that I was a little under the gun to get done what I wanted to accomplish.  As I worked on that and Dominic cleaned we both listened to the Packer game (that was the only part of the day that didn’t really work out!).  Sometimes the carpentry gods look down and smile, other days they like to laugh…  Today they smiled and everything went great!  I got done exactly what I’d hoped to get done, and with about 10 minutes to spare before the time we wanted to head out for our run.

The half marathon last Sunday felt great, but I was nervous about what typically happens when I go back to not having something that I’m training for…  I slow down or stop running longer distances.  To fight that I talked with Becky about doing an 8 miler today.  The first couple of miles were rough!!!  As soon as we passed that two mile mark everything loosened back up and it started to feel great.  We took the dogs with on the first 6 miles and then traded them straight up for a Gavin on a bike and got the last couple of miles in.  It was awesome!

Once back home the time was just about perfect to shower up and get ready for dinner with a couple of friends who were in town to do some training for about 50 of our clients in Winona tomorrow.  We headed downtown, had a great meal, and even better conversation.  Being able to catch up over a meal was pretty sweet, a cool way to start to close up the night.

We left the restaurant, headed out to Kwik Trip for a treat for the boys, headed home and all snuggled on the couch to watch a pretty fantastic SNL short (Kellywise).  It was a great way to wrap up a wonderful family weekend.

Now the boys are downstairs trading Pokemon cards (no school tomorrow), Becky’s in bed, and I’m blogging on the couch.  Once I’m done I’ll work on my book for a little bit, put the boys to bed, and then off to bed for this guy.

As I look back at it, everything just clicked today.  It didn’t necessarily follow the script er se, but everything fell into place pretty well.  Adversity will come as it always does, but for now, I’m thankful for everything working out so awesome today!

Thanks!!!

The weather may have been a little cold, wet, and dreary, but we still had fun as a family tonight as we ran (Dominic) / walked (Becky, Gavin, & I) the Glow In the Deke.

The event is held as a fund raiser and is one that we look forward to every year.  In some years we run as a family, other years we walk, and sometimes a combination of both.  Many people cover themselves in glow sticks for the race and others (specifically Gavin) spend most of the 3.1 miles picking them all up.  After starting at UWL we run through the marsh where the entire trail is lit up with over 200 tiki torches.  It is pretty spectacular!

While this year’s Glow In the Deke may have been a little more wet than normal, it was a great excuse to help out a good cause, enjoy some physical activity outside, and, best of all, spend some time with my family.

Thanks!!!

Today has been pretty much non-stop from its start until now as I sit on the couch and blog while watching a movie with Dominic & Becky.

After our morning run I got ready and kept thinking through the game plan for my day at work.  Going into it I knew I was in for a while ride, I was going to need to stay focused.

The day started off with an 8am client call focused on large growth next year.  Shortly afterwards my teammate and I were able to spend a few minutes discussing possible solutions and then I was off to back to back phone interviews at 9:00 and 10:00.

From there I had a short break in the action and was then off to lunch with a good friend I hadn’t talked with in a while.  It felt awesome to re-connect and spend some time catching back up.  I’m thinking I need to do this more often!

After lunch I was able to prep for my afternoon meetings and then it was time for another phone meeting.  This one was pretty awesome – it was a coaching / mentoring call to discuss next steps from a recent leadership survey of my teammates.  At times it was rough, having to face my faults that my teammates see that I don’t always see.  That said, it was great to have someone helping to coach me through creating a plan to improve.  It was intense, but very productive.

From there it was off to another coaching and planning meeting, followed by a call with my teammate to wrap up our thoughts on our client call that started out the morning.  It was a cool way to bring the work day full circle.

After getting home we headed out for sushi, grabbed some movies, and now are chilling on the couch.

Today was non-stop.  It was incredibly productive.  There were many rewarding moments.  All in all, it was crazy busy, but well worth it.  I’m thankful for every moment of it!

Thanks!!!

 

 

 

On a gray day like this it’s nice to find things to warm a person up.  Today there were a few things that did just that.

On my drive to Rice Lake today I was welcomed to the Northwoods by a stunning display of fall leaves.  The colors were all shades of red, yellow, and orange, all looking more vibrant when contrasted with the steel gray sky.  Cresting the hills and looking into the valleys provided some spectacular landscapes.  I had to remind myself to keep looking at the road once in a while, my eyes continued to drift to autumnal awesomeness.

Once I got to the Rice Lake office I was pleasantly surprised to find a cup of coffee waiting for me on the desk I was going to use.  Huge thank you to Nicole for both the caffeination and a wonderful cup of white coffee!

As I drove home and enjoyed the leaves I was amazed by the way the vibrance of the leaves dropped with each mile I drove.  It was like I was driving back in time, a day or two every ten miles or so.  While this almost pushed me towards a gloomy landscape a different thought popped into my head and warmed me right up…

Hawaii!  The wonderful, amazing, perfect Big Island, the warm sun and cool breeze, the sound and smell of the ocean, the total feel of relaxation…  ahh…

Whew!!!  Where was I???  Oh, that’s right, I started thinking back to Hawaii.  A friend of mine is going on vacation there in the not too distant future and I’ve been trying to help her out with hiking and travel ideas while she’s there.  As I help her out I’m quickly reminded of all of the awesomeness of Hawaii and it warms me right up.

Today may have been cloudy, dreary and a little cool, but I was warm the whole day thanks to friends, memories, and Mother Nature.

Thanks!!!

While talking with a friend in the investment world I’d asked him how things were going.  His response struck me as odd and it took a little while to register…  “I’m throwing starfish into the ocean, one at a time.”  In his voice I could hear his smile and his passion for helping people very clearly.  As our conversation when on it finally donned on me where that phrase was from, a story I’d heard once or twice a long time ago.

Once upon a time, there was an old man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach every morning before he began his work. Early one morning, he was walking along the shore after a big storm had passed and found the vast beach littered with starfish as far as the eye could see, stretching in both directions. 

Off in the distance, the old man noticed a small boy approaching.  As the boy walked, he paused every so often and as he grew closer, the man could see that he was occasionally bending down to pick up an object and throw it into the sea.  The boy came closer still and the man called out, “Good morning!  May I ask what it is that you are doing?”

The young boy paused, looked up, and replied “Throwing starfish into the ocean. The tide has washed them up onto the beach and they can’t return to the sea by themselves,” the youth replied. “When the sun gets high, they will die, unless I throw them back into the water.”

The old man replied, “But there must be tens of thousands of starfish on this beach. I’m afraid you won’t really be able to make much of a difference.”

The boy bent down, picked up yet another starfish and threw it as far as he could into the ocean. Then he turned, smiled and said, “It made a difference to that one!”

adapted by Peter Straube from The Star Thrower, by Loren Eiseley (1907 – 1977)

(You can also check out a video version of this story by clicking on this text)

How awesome is that story?  There are couple of ways that this stories hits me hard, right between the eyes.

So many times in life I find myself coming up with crazy huge ideas that I want to be totally ginormous in scope, as grand as possible.  When that happens I usually end up putting a lot of thought into it, but not a lot actually happens.  Had I spent more time taking the small initial actions there would have been progress, maybe the results wouldn’t have been as grand, but there would have been results.

When presenting I sometimes get disappointed when I can’t seem to get someone in the room engaged.  Try as I might to get them involved I just can’t quite seem to bring them along and into the conversation.  When this happens I mentally get frustrated and try to think of ways to involve them, while I’m presenting.  As I think while presenting the quality of my presentation goes down.  In those moments I need to remember to focus on the ones that I can make an impact on.

Both ways hit me hard today and I chuckled to myself as I saw them happen.  What a beautifully simple story to help keep me on track and pointed in the right direction.

As I talked with Steve he shared that he kept a starfish at his desk to remind him of this story on a daily basis.  Don’t be too surprised if you see something similar on my desk in the not too distant future.

Thanks!!!

Yesterday’s blog was pretty deep and heavy, today’s is much more light hearted.

Long story short, I love my family.  Tonight we enjoyed something as a family that is a little dorky, but all types of awesome in my book…  We watched the new Star Wars trailer together and followed it up with a short video breaking down the trailer!

The fact that all of us were sitting mesmerized and staring at my laptop as the preview played makes me love my family all the more!  I am thankful to be a part of a nerdy (and proud of it) family!

Thanks!!!

Grief is a pretty messed up thing.  Even its definition is crazy complex:

Grief is a multifaceted response to loss, particularly to the loss of someone or something that has died, to which a bond or affection was formed. Although conventionally focused on the emotional response to loss, it also has physical, cognitive, behavioral, social, cultural, and philosophical dimensions.

Seriously?  Could it be more complex?  Pretty sure that when the word “multifaceted” is thrown into a definition it is there only because the definition is really too complex or difficult to really understand.  Some writer at Webster’s probably had a go at defining it for a few days and and finally said, “screw it, there’s no clear way to define it…  I’m just going to say it’s ‘multifaceted’ and call it a day.”

So you’re probably wondering where this is all coming from and why I’m thankful for it today.  I know, kind of a weird rabbit trail today, isn’t it?

While driving home today I fired up some music and just took some time to chill and think.  The song that started once I plugged in my phone was the very sad, yet hopeful, theme song to Gattacca – The Departure by Michael Nyman.  It is hauntingly beautiful, flowing with obvious sadness, but even though there are no words, you can hear the hope in it, the optimism of something better.  As I listened I thought of my dad and remembered the movie.  There were themes crossing paths as I thought of his passing and the end of the movie that were sad, yet loving and positive.

After that song I went for another that seemed to fit the mood – a song that is a combination of This Bitter Earth by Dinah Washington and On the Nature of Daylight by Max Richter.  This song fits a similar bill, sad yet hopeful.  Once you start to listen you can’t help but start to get sucked into it.  I don’t know that I’ve ever listened to it just once, it’s always better twice in a row.  If you are having a tough time picturing where you’ve heard it before – it’s in the movie Shutter Island.

From there I stumbled into 7 Years by Lukas Graham – a song that Dominic had on a playlist and I recently listened to a couple of times when hanging out with Gavin in the workshop.  I know, totally pop music-ish, but the concept of the song just felt right, especially the lyrics, “Soon I’ll be sixty years old, my daddy got sixty-one – Remember life and then your life becomes a better one.”

Once I got home and started firing up the grill I had another song pop into my head and had to play it right away – Good Grief by Bastille.  While the lyrics are focused on grief and the pain of loss, the song is incredibly upbeat.  As they wrote it that was the entire focus and meaning behind the song (think of the title, kind of an interesting play on words):  “Smith wanted the song to encapsulate, ‘the stages of denial, shock, depression and complete euphoria’ that come with feelings of grief, and the alien feeling of being at a funeral. ‘It could be a massive celebration of someone, or hugely sad. There could be moments of euphoria and people getting pissed and collapsing on the floor.’ As Smith explains, grief is a ‘complicated reality’.”  Pretty much nails the feeling of grief, doesn’t it?

As we started wrapping up the night I was blogging on the couch and played a couple of music videos for the boys right before they went to bed.  After the one I said would be the last I made the mistake of looking to the right column of YouTube and I saw one that I HAD to click on with the boys…  after starting it Becky put down what she was doing and took it in with us.  The song/video?  The Nights by Avicii…  a song that always makes me think of Dad and of being a dad.

As I look back at it, today I’ve felt “a multifaceted response to loss, particularly to the loss of someone or something that has died, to which a bond or affection was formed,” – I have felt grief.  I’ve been sad, I’ve cried.  The funny thing is that while I’ve had those two feelings, they’re in the overwhelming minority.

Most of what I’ve felt has been the following:

• Happiness – so many incredible memories that I’m so thankful to have.
• Love – my family has surrounded me most of the night and we’ve enjoyed each other’s company.
• Laughter – thinking back to memories we’ve had together, the jokes we shared, seeing the world through the eyes of a dad and thinking of how he must’ve felt at various time.
• Gratitude – as I’m a father I’m so thankful to have had a dad who was an incredible role model for me to follow in the footsteps in.

Today I’ve felt grief for the loss of my father… and it felt really good.  I miss Dad, but even in his passing he’s helping to bring me joy.  If grief can bring joy as much or more as it can bring sorrow, I am very thankful for it.

Dad, this was an interesting day.  Mom had warned me that there was just something about Fall and missing parents and loved ones, she was totally right.  It’s funny though, I started off sad and missing you.  You probably saw some of the tears and gave me some shit (as much as you are allowed to in Heaven anyways).  That feeling of sadness didn’t last very long, it was quickly replaced with joy, love, happiness, laughter, and gratitude.  I miss you tons, please know that you are still bringing me joy even though you’re gone.  I love you Dude!

Thanks!!!

Ahh…  The feeling of success…  and then more success…  Throw in a chaser of an exciting Packer victory and there’s nothing but an after taste of success!

Becky and I finished our half marathon this morning and we did way better than either of us expected.  It was pretty awesome to spend time running with Becky as we completed a goal we’d set together.  Not going to lie, it was kind of funny thinking back to our first half marathon when I was all bubbly and excited, helping to keep her going when she wasn’t feeling the strongest.  Here we were today in completely flipped roles.  She was bubbly, encouraging and cheering everyone on and I just wanted to find a ditch to die in!  She kept me going and we finished.  It was a sweet and sweaty success!

After cleaning up Becky headed up north to pick up Dominic, the Deer Slayer!  Dominic hunted in the Youth hunt with his Grandpa Ken and shot his first deer.  He was pretty pumped and excited, I’m so happy they had a successful hunt.  If you’d like to hear an awesome story be sure to ask him how he shot it.  I can guarantee he’ll be smiling the whole time.

While they were driving back to La Crosse Dominic called to let me know that I wasn’t supposed to pick anything up to grill for supper, we were going to grill up some of his venison steaks…  They were AWESOME!!!  Delicious success!

Life is always full of ups and downs, this was a day that ended with pretty much all ups.  Sweet and sweaty successes.  Delicious success.  Did I mention a Green & Gold success?

Thanks!!!