Day 2,386

Growth:

Pausing to be aware of my thoughts and actions as they happen leads to many insightful moments. The clarity they provide in the fog clouding the gap between who I am and who I should be is very helpful.

Appreciation:

As we wrapped up our extremely fun weekend we chilled as a family to watch Ted Lasso while eating some ‘za. We don’t have much downtime as a family, this little pocket of it felt amazing as we dive headlong into another busy week.

Presence:

I’m not sure which is more fun – hiding Easter eggs or finding Easter eggs! What a great time we had as a family while the boys were looking for eggs at Mom’s this morning. Many laughs, shared memories, and fun.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,385

Growth:

Time with family doesn’t need to be well structured or be planned. All that is needed is time together without distraction. Time together is amazing.

Appreciation:

What a positively amazing day on so many levels! So much fun, so many laughs, and so many memories created. Such a wonderful Easter weekend at Mom’s!

Presence:

Time spent at the zoo today was awesome as always. The novelty of seeing wildlife not normally seen always quickly focuses me on the present. Specifically, the ostrich. What a wildly complicated and uncanny animal!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,384

Growth:

Deadlines and constraints can be wonderfully productive and positive when used appropriately. Sometimes they are exactly the catalysts necessary to complete a project.

Appreciation:

Taking a little bit of time at the end of the week to clean up all the stuff that has littered the inbox, my desktop, and my literal desktop really leave me with such a calmness. Today I made sure I had everything prepared for next week and everything cleaned up from this week. When I start the work week on Monday I’ll be starting from an awesome place and I’ll be both well rested and prepared.

Presence:

Spending time lost in conversation at Mom’s – no stress, no electronics, and no distractions. Only conversation. Such an enjoyable time!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,383

Growth:

I went in reverse order tonight which really helped lead me to this topic.

In the moment in which something happens I have a very specific reaction and thought process based on the person I am in that moment. As time passes and I look back to that same event my perspective is often very different thanks to the additional experiences I’ve had since then. Sometimes this can lead to a little frustration at how the event was initially handled, but I need to remember to give myself grace. The me of back then did not have the life experiences I do today which would have led to a different reaction.

The me of now then has to help make mental notes for the the future me in order to react to similar situations the way I would like to handle them now but with the understanding that the me of now and the me of the future and the me after the future me will all likely look at the situation differently thanks to their different experiences.

Ouch… I think I just broke my brain. 😉

Here’s the short version – remember and analyze past events to focus on growth rather than to judge myself and my actions in the past. Growth and grace over judging.

Appreciation:

Well written fiction does an amazing job of dredging up long lost memories. As I’ve been reading The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss there’ve been a handful of times in which it took me way back to experiences in middle school, high school, and college. So much fun thinking back to those old memories. The person I was when they happened is so different and yet somewhat similar to the person I am now. So interesting to see the difference in perspective from then to now!

Presence:

How awesome is it to hear the birds chirping and singing in the morning? So glad Spring is here, little things like the singing of birds really help center my brain on the present moment.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,382

Growth:

There is very little we truly have control over in our lives. We can’t always choose what happens but we can choose how we respond. I’ve blogged about this often but it is still a lesson I’m always grateful to remember.

I have several options to work on this today. Some went well, others less well. In each I caught myself observing myself and it created an introspective sensation of awareness. So far to grow!

Appreciation:

In so many ways it feels like I’ve been with Express forever and in just as many ways it feels like it’s only been a few years. Thanks to a project I was working on today I paused to reflect on all twenty three years of my Express life. Some lessons from twenty years still burn clearly in memory while some from the past year seem so much older. I’m thankful for working on this project today, it’s reminded me of so many moments while helping me appreciate all the experiences I’ve had.

Presence:

One of the reasons I love our normal route for our morning runs is the way I feel like I’m out in the woods. This morning Becky stopped to listen to the sound of an owl hooting from across the river. Earlier there was a rabbit who decided to run alongside us. What a wonderful way to start the day!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,381

Growth:

I used to see leadership as meaning I needed to talk most, but I’ve learned that nearly the opposite is true.

Appreciation:

I’m beyond grateful for those moments when someone finally sees the beginnings of the true potential in themselves that we’ve seen in them for a while. That magical aha moment in which you can see the lightbulb flash on and the smile appear on their face is truly priceless and one of my favorite moments in life.

Presence:

I left for my office in Eau Claire before 6:20am and arrived home after 6:20pm. Even though I was tired from the drive, the weather, and work I was so happy to be home in time to eat supper with my family. Spending time with Becky and hearing about the news of the day from the boys was awesome and totally centered me in the moment. What a gift to share a moment with family around the dining room.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,380

Growth:

Inspired by a book I recently read – The Holy Longing by Ronald Rolheiser – there’s been a thought I keep going back to in my head. In my humble opinion, in many ways it is perfect for Easter season. The concept I keep going back to is realizing that in many ways we have to accept the changes which happen in life and our joy may be derived from how we view those changes.

Where this is really hitting for me is a wonderful example from today. I worked from home this afternoon due to an eye appointment and was able to get supper started on the grill while I worked. We had dinner for the tow of us, relaxed and talked, set up our accommodations for the 2024 solar eclipse (an event on both of our bucket lists) and then headed out to our typical Monday Yoga Date Night. The car ride provided more time for the two of us, the yoga was a wonderful shared experience, and on the way home we were able to talk about the yoga session and life in general.

Back in the day a date night would have been completely different in so many ways. We enjoyed different things, had a different relationship, and were very different people in many ways. Seeing the large change between our relationship twenty years ago and our relationship now is rather mind boggling.

If I didn’t recognize that we’ve changed and it would be easy for me to want what we used to have, to be who we used to be, and to re-live the “glory days.” If that was the case and I wanted only what we had in the past I could live a rather miserable life and not enjoy the moment.

If I recognize the difference and look to all the ways I appreciate both how we were and how we are AND recognize that I can both appreciate who we were while being grateful for who we are my heart is full of the joy which can only come from appreciation and gratitude. As someone once said – “happiness is wanting what you have, not having what you want.”

Life changes us, it changes others around us, and it changes the world. Each night we say goodbye to the present which is about to become our past, we witness the death of who we were, and we are reborn into the new day… which will very quickly be shed as we die to that present and are reborn into the new. The wisdom I want to remind my future self of today is to appreciate each – the past, the present, and the future. They are each different, they are each beautiful in their own way if I choose to see their beauty and to appreciate them. But once the present dies and becomes the past I must remember to look to the present rather than attempt to shape the present into the past.

LOL – I really just over complicated the shit out of this one! I might have to come back to this one sometime in the future!

Appreciation:

We all have dreams whether we want to call them that or not, whether we have them written down or not. Today I’m grateful for taking time to write out a list of what I want to live before I die. I’m grateful for sharing that list with Becky and for hearing her list. I’m grateful for finding dreams we share and for taking action on those dreams.

One that we realized we had in common is to see a total solar eclipse form right in the path of totality. We did some homework to figure out when the next total eclipse would be, where it would be, and set a calendar reminder to help us lock up a hotel or house rental for the event over a year in advance.

Today the calendar invite buzzed, we took action, and have our spot reserved to watch the solar eclipse, to make one of our dreams happen. The only way this happened was by pausing to consider what we wanted out of life, to set a plan to make it happen, and to then take action on it. So glad we took each of those steps and shared our dream lists, so pumped to live out another one of our dreams together!

Presence:

Yoga for the win. I know, I sound like a broken record, but there’s such a magic to the presence of yoga. Moving my body synchronized with my breathing, such a powerful presence creating combo!

Tonight was more of the same. Even before class started I was laying on my back, my eyes closed, and focused only on my breathing. Nothing else in the world mattered and there was no stress, there was only the moment and me floating within it. Throughout the class my mind stayed focused on the task at hand. I could feel my muscles individually tense and stretch with each pose. I could feel my body opening up as I twisted with my breath. Each movement and the results of it were the only things in my mind. Such a perfect state of flow!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,379

Growth:

Some actions really outweigh others when attempting to change behavior. Not all actions are equal, there are typically a couple of specific actions that can make a huge difference. The key is in pinpointing those actions and taking them.

This was manifested for me today in choosing to prep my lunches for the week. Focus on the right choices at the grocery store. Make my meals all at once. Those two actions will have the highest return on how I eat this week.

Pause to think about what will really lift the load. Where to place the fulcrum, where to place the lever. Think twice, lift easily once, and live to lift another day.

Appreciation:

One of my favorite stories from the Bible is Matthew’s version of Jesus praying in the garden of Gethsemane. For so many reasons it continues to be one of the moments in which I can understand my faith more clearly. His humanness becomes so palpable in that story and really helps me see the bigger picture of God.

This story is also such an inspiring reminder of controlling what we can control and realizing there are moments when we must trust and let go. The grace shown in that moment – and the struggles that even Jesus faced in that moment – brings on the feels every time I think of it.

Presence:

The hiking trail we stumbled upon a couple months ago continues to bring some excellent moments of presence and new discoveries. Today there were the combinations of different tree species right next to each other, the always and only counterclockwise spiraling of the vines up trees, and the bark that seems to grow in layers from outside the tree. So many new discoveries for me to help draw in focus. I’m so grateful for the outdoors!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,378

Growth:

Will we ever really know the true depth of the impact we’ve made in life? We went to a celebration of life for the brother of a friend today. Throughout I couldn’t help but wonder if he realized how much joy he’d brought to so many.

Now as I type I can’t shake the thought that my initial question is misguided. Does it really matter if we know the impact we’ve made or is that just an egocentric thought? Better to live in a way that we brighten lives because it is the right thing to do and not ask for validation.

Ugh.., ego. Yet again you flare up. So thankful to take time to reflect and think, it’s the flashlight needed to scare ego out of the shadows.

Appreciation:

Even in loss there is beauty. Gathering of friends, sharing of stories, opening of emotions, expressions of love, opportunities for growth. The loss itself can hurt so tremendously, but we can choose to look for bright spots around it. Many big my thoughts today have been focused in very different directions, largely centered on life and death, the value of time, accepting what we can really control, faith, and the ways we come together as community to help each other. More growth and insight as a result of loss,

Presence:

With all the different directions we’ve all been going it was incredibly soul warming to eat supper together as a family. Eating together, talking, and spending time together was one of my favorite moments of the day.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,377

LOL – too exhausted from the drive home to blog too much AND there’s one thing I’m most grateful for today.

Due to the crazy snowfall and blizzard conditions our normally two hour ride turned into an over four hour harrowing journey. That was the closest I’ve ever been to pulling over to wait out the snow.

What’s most important is that we made it home safe.

Thanks!!!