Sometimes I’ve got a blog in me all bottled up and ready to go and all I need to do is let it loose. Other times the act of sitting down to type my blog is exactly what my brain needs to process the events of the day. The writing itself becomes a combination of thinking, learning, reinforcement, and therapy. Tonight? Tonight is totally one of the nights when I’m looking forward to taking the time to pause, slow down, and think.

My morning started off with intentionality. I was sure to go to bed early last night to be well rested to jump right back into reality. It felt wonderful to get back into my normal routine of reading, thinking, and reviewing my goals before getting out of bed.

Last week I was grateful for the opportunity to let a thought sit and ferment over a long period of time before taking action. I utilized that process again today and it paid huge dividends. My initial train of thought would not have been nearly as effective as where my thoughts eventually led. At one point I paused and smiled and soaked in the joy of seeing something come together almost perfectly. Without intentionality I usually tend towards taking action. Pausing before taking action was exactly what led to success.

Today I’m thankful for not visiting Dad. Dominic learned a valuable life lesson about driving today. Meanwhile, I am pretty sure he shaved a year off of my life in the process. Everything is good, nothing was damaged and no one was hurt – excepting, of course, my heart. After the shock subsided and my blood pressure went back down I got a laugh out of knowing that I must have done the same to my parents way back in the day when I learned to drive.

I’m also thankful for perspective. In thinking about Dominic’s maneuver while driving I couldn’t help but think about how I would have reacted if I were in the other car. Would I have been frustrated and angry or calm, forgiving, and understanding of a novice driver? I know the answer, it wouldn’t be the right one, and that’s something I need to remember.

I’m grateful for open mindedness and seeing new metaphors to help me understand some of the deeper thoughts of life. There are so many things I’ll most likely never understand while I walk this earth, but I know that if I keep a closed mind I am certain to never see or understand them. By keeping an open mind I can provide an opportunity to possibly see something to help me truly see. When listening to a podcast on our trip there was a discussion about finding ways to see different types of energy in outer space. Before we learned how to see them we didn’t know they existed. Once we saw them we were able to better understand. What in life am I not seeing as I am not ready to see it yet or haven’t been looking for in the right way?

One of the other thoughts ringing through my head over the past day or so is the need to create space for creative time. There is a time and place for busy-ness and action, but there is also a time for quiet thought and creation. In many ways, that is exactly what this has become for me tonight. I am thankful for so many things today – some I’ve written about and others I’m holding in my heart – but taking the time to write and create this evening is what is providing me the opportunity to appreciate all of those blessings even more this evening.

There was more I’d like to write, but I have a LuLu to attend to. With being away from home she’s decided it’s time for me to stop writing. My focus should be on her – according to her. 😉

Thanks!!!

COVID may have thrown our vacation plans for a loop, but we were still able to figure out ways to have a safe family road trip. From the St Louis Arch to Hot Springs National Park to digging for gems to spending time with Becky’s sister and our brother in law our road trip was a huge success. There were many smiles and many memories made while also remembering past trips as a family.

One part of the road trip I’m always grateful for is a safe return home. It’s easy to get missed and taken for granted, but it’s definitely something to be thankful for. Getting home on time, in one piece and 100% healthy is the best part of wrapping up any vacation.

Something else I’m thankful for is a specific podcast that Becky downloaded and got us both hooked on – StarTalk by Neil deGrasse Tyson. What an awesome way to be reminded of the wonder of the natural world (and many other topics)! In our time on the road I learned more about black holes, the concept of time, volcanoes, and astrophysics than I’ve learned in my entire life combined. The funny thing was that Becky really nailed the way we were feeling about black holes – “the more I learn the less I understand.” The podcasts were a perfect way to keep learning while also staying entertained during hours and hours of driving. I haven’t done the Patreon thing yet, but this would be one of the first I’d contribute to.

Thanks!!!

What’s your favorite autobiography? If you were going to recommend one autobiography to a friend, which would it be? What is it that you appreciate the most about that book? What was the biggest insight you took away from it? Why are you grateful for reading it?

One of the reasons I enjoy reading autobiographies is the ability to see the world through someone else’s eyes. By pausing my life to read about theirs I’m able to see how differing thought processes work. Often I catch myself in my own paradigms of thought as those thoughts are the ones I know best. When I think of my life experiences I have the tendency of thinking that everyone has had the same life experiences.

The most recent autobiography I’ve had in hand is The Push by Tommy Caldwell. I’m only a little ways in, but I’m already enjoying the story behind how one of the greatest climbers of all time grew into that title. Reading about his childhood has left me scratching my head on more than one occasion already. A few times I’ve had to pause, go backwards, and then remind myself that he was only 6 when he climbed Devils Tower, only 12 when he climbed The Diamond at Long’s Peak. I like to think I’m pushing the boys by having us go out to camp several times each year. When he was six he’d go off camping by himself. It’s wild!

Reading an autobiography like this is such a great way to help me expand my mindset and views. Hearing the extremes people will go to for their passions motivates me to do the same for mine. When I think something isn’t possible I can remind myself of how many times others have done the impossible. It is also common to go through periods of questioning themselves – the difference is that they push through instead of listening to the voice in their head.

Thanks!!!

Way back in late July / almost August 2019 my Express Leadership Academy cohorts and I met in St Pete’s in Florida. The last night of our awesome training was one I’ll remember for the entirety of my life.

While others had invited me to join them for dinner and a night of drinks and camaraderie I felt compelled to decline and spend some time alone. We’d had a mind blowing couple of days of training on many different topics. More than anything my brain felt like it needed time to process all the information it had just taken in. I politely declined and opted for my own Plan B.

I ordered an early dinner via room service. After a great meal in my room in silence I put in my ear buds and went outside to the beach.

While sitting on a chair on the beach I watched what was one of the single most beautiful sunsets I’ve ever watched in my life. In my ears I heard the album “Sleep” by Max Richter. When the entire experience was complete I had a mind blowing sunset crossed with a wildly peaceful musical album with a side of solitude. This mix combined to create what was one of the most profoundly serene and peaceful moments of my entire life.

Almost two years later when I hear that album I think back to that time on the beach. When I have a feeling of deep peace I think back to this time alone on the beach. When I know I need to slow down and relax I think of my time on the beach. Two years later that moment of wonderful serenity is tattooed into my psyche.

Over the past few days that moment on the beach has come to mind several times. The instantaneous peace that comes to my soul is nothing short of beautiful. It was a moment in time when I remembered to stop and just listen to life and all it had to say without using words. It reminds me to enjoy those wildly beautiful moments of life and to appreciate the moments of perfect serenity in life.

Thanks!!!

Lots of driving today. Hours and hours. Well worth it for where we’d been. Well worth it for where we were going. All went well on the drive and we arrived safe and sound.

Something that really helped to not only pass the time but kept my brain going a thousand miles per hour was a steady diet of podcasts. Relatively short segments of learning certain topics. Amongst my favorites were a handful of Star Talk by Neil Degrasse Tyson focused on some pretty wild physics concepts. there were also a few wildly thought provoking others as well. Finding a way to keep the entire family learning while driving was pretty awesome.

Another thing I’m thankful for today are mental bread crumbs. What do I mean by those? Things like this pic from yesterday:

I snapped this pic on our hike yesterday. Without fail, at some point in the future I’ll stumble across it in my photos. I’ll pause and stare at it. I’ll read it and remember where, when, and why I took it. I’ll smile and re-live the mindset I was in when I took the picture.

This works not only with pictures, but with other random notes and quotes and thoughts saved in one of a variety of different formats including apps and paper. Today I stumbled across a quote from Walden that made me think and smile. On an almost daily basis I’ll run across a mental bread crumb or two. days like today I’m reminded of how thankful I am for the moments when I take time to leave them as well.

ThNks

Number one on my dream list is to visit all the National Parks with Becky. Prior to this morning we’d had visited 29 of the 63 parks. Late this afternoon we knocked out #30 – Hot Springs National Park.

While this wasn’t the craziest or most scenic parks we’ve been too it was pretty wild to visit. The trails were completely quiet and peaceful with only a couple of other people on them. The hot springs are very interesting to see and put our hands and feet into.

One of the other parts I’m really liking about this National Park is that one of the old bathhouses that is technically in the National Park has been converted to a brewery – with beer take out! Whoever would’ve thought that beer made in a National Park made with natural hot spring water would be so delicious?

Seriously, this visit has been an awesome double whammy. First, we’re one step closer to a lifelong goal, something that’s always worth celebrating. Second, we created many memories as a family doing something we love doing together – the something that makes the dream even more worthwhile and meaningful.

Thanks!!!

Yesterday I was plowing through my task list early in the morning when an email caught my eye. A good friend is working on a project and asked if I could help. Without hesitation I started typing up an email saying yes and seeing how many different ways I may be able to help. I was smiling from ear to ear at the opportunity to help and repay her for all the ways she’s helped me. As I wrapped up the email a bell rang in my brain…

One of my big three goals for this year is totally in her wheelhouse. Seeing I was already in contact why not see if she might have an idea to help me move my goal closer to conclusion.

The email I received bag was incredible! Not only was she happy to help she immediately introduced me to an individual who could really help me out drastically! How awesome is that?

In the back of my head I’d planned on contacting her at some point for help, but I probably would’ve waited way longer than I should have per my discomfort with asking for help (see yesterday’s post). The email she sent was so cosmically well timed I can’t help but pause and be thankful for such a serendipitous moment.

Another thing I’m very grateful for today is intentional scarcity. My brain works in strange ways. When I’ve got a project due I like to spend much time tossing it over and over in my brain. The longer I can let it ferment and rough out many different ideas and solutions the better the final product.

Unfortunately my brain has a tendency of wanting to continue working on an idea much longer than I should. As soon as I come to a right solution I immediately go to work on creating a “more right” solution. If I’m not careful I can quickly cross the threshold of diminishing returns and have no finished project.

What I’ve been working on for the past week had a deadline of late this morning. With three hours to spare I put a stop to all the ideation and moved into creating the finished project. I put myself into an intentional mindset of scarcity.

With that scarcity mindset I was able to hyper focus on putting all of my ideas into a concise and consolidated whole. I then took a step back, reviewed the “why” behind the project, looked at it through my eyes, my team’s eyes, my customer’s eyes, and then back to the why. Several revisions were made and then there it was before me.

From the outside it’s be easy to think that it was created just in those short couple of hours. In reality it was the hours upon hours of thought beforehand that was the majority of the heavy lifting. With that foundation laid the focused mindset of scarcity helped to force me to build the solution on the foundation.

For sure, a state of constant and uncontrolled scarcity would have doomed this project. That said, using it to apply the right pressure at the time and in the right place was pure gold!

It reminds me of the story I’ve mentioned many times of Dad telling me about taking time to assess the solution completely before choosing the right tool and plan of attack. I’d just spent minutes grunting, groaning, and sweating as I wrestled with an old cabinet I was attempting to remove. As he told me the story he calmly picked up a crowbar, sized up the cabinet, stuck one end of the crowbar into a very specific spot. Finishing his story he smiled at me, winked, gently nudged the crowbar… and set the entire cabinet free.

Intentional scarcity as a tool… definitely a lesson I need to remember more often!

Thanks!!!

The conversation on our morning run took an interesting and thought provoking time this morning. In essence there was a question that kept my head thinking. Is the pursuit of perfection a good thing?

Personally, I love the pursuit of perfection. What’s wild is that I know that it will never actually happen, but I still find it something worth striving for. In my head I measure success as growth towards something and not the something itself. If I pause and get frustrated for not being perfect I can shut myself down in anger or disappointment. If I focus on what I’ve learned from this specific pursuit of perfection I can use it to fuel me to push harder, try again, and continue the pursuit. Ultimately, my choice in attitude determines whether or not I find motivation or disappointment in pursuing perfection.

Starting my morning with that thought forming in my head helped me focus on choosing a growth mindset through the day – something I’m very grateful for!

One of our online training sessions today really helped me see a concept from a different perspective. The topic was on vulnerability and I was quickly reminded of how much I (& virtually everyone) enjoy helping people. When someone has a challenge or struggle we find joy in helping and supporting them.

What I was also forced to quickly see is how much I avoid being the person who needs the help sometimes. This is probably a longer topic for a different day – the short version is that it is almost a phobia of mine, needing help. I want to be independent – my greatest motivator – and asking for help directly opposes that.

During the training one of my Express “heroes” admitted that they were struggling and needed help. Never in a million years would I have ever thought that would be the case. They’re the one who’s always helping someone else while motivating and inspiring so many. To witness their vulnerability was an eye opener for me. If they are willing to ask for help when they are struggling why do I struggle to do the same?

An interesting insight I found with this is to remember to view the challenge through the lens of what would I recommend to a friend. When attaining a slight different perspective it’s easy to see that I should ask for help. If I can remember to use that mindset I know can make a better choice in the future.

I’m so grateful for that training and insight today, I will remember it for years to come.

Thanks!!!

One of my favorite all time metaphors is thinking of life as a shadowbox. Jim Collins turned me on to this concept many years ago and it’s stuck with me. When I learn a profound new way of viewing the world I think back to the shadowbox.

Back when I was a kid I still remember a school project involving putting together an entire world in a shoe box. We cut out holes in the top and covered them with tissue paper so light could get in but our curious eyes couldn’t look through. We then cut a set of eyeholes in one side to view the world we’d each created.

If we paused and punched new holes in from a different side we’d see details never before seen. They existed the entire time but we couldn’t see them until we had a different angle. Not only were there new sights to see, there was also more context helping us see how things may be related. When those new holes were opened up we could see the world differently than before. When we would look back through the original eye holes we would now see details and meanings that had previously gone unnoticed. Everything inside was exactly the same but we’d never see or understand it all until we’d seen it from all angles.

I like to think of our world, my life, and my thought processes as a giant shadow box. My entire life is there in the shadowbox. Sometimes I have a new set of eye holes punched in to look through – ie Stoicism, religion, a life altering experience, etc… Quite often it comes in the form of a new idea or concept from a book or video. Regardless of the delivery system I’m provided with an opportunity to look at my thought processes from a different perspective, to see different connections, and to better see more of the whole self.

Today the new eyeholes came in the form of a Zoom presentation by Patrick Lencioni sharing The Working Genius model (check it out herehttps://www.workinggenius.com/). In the matter of thirty minutes my mind was blown from the new perspectives he shared. The model helps to show how work happens and how each of us contribute different strengths to see it through to completion. Such a simple concept with so much depth. This’ll certainly be one my brain keeps wrapping itself around.

Thanks!!!

I love spending time with my family. Whether it’s all four of us together or some combination of at least two of us time with my family is pretty much my favorite thing in the world. With COVID we’ve had a ton of time together as a family over the past year.

When Becky and the boys got home yesterday after being out of town over the weekend Becky pointed something out that pretty much floored me. My jaw dropped as I tried to figure out if her comment was true. Near as I can still figure she’s 100% right.

Due to COVID I haven’t had an entire weekend to myself like I had this past weekend in well over a year. How crazy is that? These weekends don’t happen often when there’s not a pandemic, but they usually aren’t nearly this rare.

The entire weekend was spent doing thing on my time. Go to bed early, wake up when I feel like it. Not much of an agenda, just a list of what I want to accomplish. Change my mind and want to do something else? Sure, why not? Turn up the music a little louder than normal. Eat at the random hours when I’m actually hungry and eat whatever I’m in the mood for (corned beef? Yes, please!). When I want some quiet time I just turned everything off and chilled. When I wanted to walk I went. Hmm… which movie do I want to watch as I wind down? Oh, that’s right, whatever one I’d like to watch. The entire weekend was at my pace, my volume, and on my timeline. Ahh…

For sure, while it felt amazing, part of the reason it did was because it had been a while since the last one. Granted, I didn’t have any idea it had been over a year, but I knew it had been a while regardless. There’s a crazy deep level of peace and serenity when I have quiet time like that once in a while.

If I could only choose one for the rest of my life I’d choose family time over solo time without having to put any thought into it. That’d be an easy choice. It is wonderful that it is not a binary thing and I’m able to add the occasional alone time to the mix of family time. Weekends alone like this help me to be a better husband, dad, and friend. My batteries recharge and I’m able to be a better me than I would be without time to myself.

This weekend was exactly what I needed and I’m so grateful for having the entire weekend to myself. The next one doesn’t have to be anytime soon, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed that it does happen in less than a year this time.

Thanks!!!