On Sunday we were parking the pontoon in our driveway.  Becky was trying to help me out with where I needed to go with it, but we were communicating in completely different ways and not understanding each other.  I wanted her to be doing one thing and she thought she should be doing it a different way.  As I was finishing up I couldn’t help but laugh as a memory popped back into my head.

I’m still not quite sure what we had on the trailer, but I remember my dad asking me to get out and help direct him in backing up.  What I do remember was that he had a seemingly irrational wave anger suddenly come over him and I couldn’t figure out what he was so frustrated about.  Now, decades later, I understand. 🙂

Ever since the boys arrived it’s been funny to see just how many times something happens  that causes me to suddenly understand what it was that was so frustrating for them in that specific moment.  Most of the time it’s pretty harmless.  Hit in the crotch by the boys, apologize to my dad.  Boys break something in the house, apologize to my mom.  Seems like the boys are ungrateful little bastards (which I type with a smile and in a loving way), apologize to both of them.  It’s crazy to think that funny used to be knocking my dad’s hat off into the lake and mean used to be throwing me in after it.  Now, I see that I may have had it backwards! 😉

While I wouldn’t even know where to start on all of the times I’ve told them that they were right, every time it makes me smile huge and I have fun sharing the story with them.  Being able to consider them such great friends and being able to have complete humility is a fantastic thing.  The fact that they are still around is also a great thing that I am very appreciative of.  I can’t, or don’t want to, imagine a day when I am not able to hop on the phone and share how the boys made their first crack about putting me in a nursing home and then apologize for doing the same!  (Nick, you did sign the papers for Dad, right?)  Every day I can share with them is a blessing and I am very grateful.

Thanks!!!

Way back in the day, like decades ago in the high school days, my friends and I went to a concert together.  It was one of our first overnight road trips, head to a concert in Stevens Point, stay over at James’ grandparents’ house, and then head back.  While the main act is pretty embarrassing to mention, please keep in mind that it was in Stevens Point…  Anything was better than nothing.

When we got to the show we found our metal folding chairs in the middle of the gymnasium (yup, that’s how tiny it was) and waited for the concert to start.  The warm up was a band we hadn’t heard of before, Billy Pilgrim.  It was two dudes with acoustic guitars and microphones.  That was it.  No supporting cast, no anything, just them.  Prepared to be completely underwhelmed we were absolutely shocked when they started playing.  My mind was blown, they were AWESOME!  The songs were great, the lyrics fantastic and the way they were just enjoying the hell out of jamming out was very memorable.  Needless to say, they completely destroyed the headliner.

It took a while, but eventually I was able to track down their albums.  Ever since they have been either in a CD binder in the car or downloaded on my phone.  So many of their songs have resonated with me at various times in my life and it seems like I pick up something new every once in a while or see things in a different light.  There’s just something relaxing and soothing about listening to their music.  It’s like snuggling up under a warm blanket on a cold rainy day.

And that’s why they popped into my brain today.  Between running around seemingly non-stop for the past couple of weeks with another busy couple of weeks ahead of us my nerves have been feeling a little frazzled.  Soccer, cub scouts, work, and everything in between I caught myself having to take a few more deep breaths tonight than I’d like.  Driving home from scouts I heard a lyric in my head that made me smile, hit the brakes, whip a U turn and head to the store to pick up a little something…

From their song Halfway Home (great song to chill to by the way!) :  “Son just sit a while, and let the whiskey dull the edge”

And that was all I need to hear in my head.  I poured myself a little, turned on that song, sat on the couch and started typing this blog.  It was the music my soul needed to hear today to help me chill.

I’m so thankful that we happened to stumble onto this band way back in the day!

Thanks!!!

Interesting side note #1, I’m pretty sure this was the same road trip when Chris rolled down the window (literally) and joked about throwing his Hootie and the Blowfish CD out.  One second he’s laughing and joking, the next it flies out the window and his jaw drops.  “I didn’t mean to do that,”was his response as the rest of us laughed.

Interesting side note #2, Billy Pilgrim is no longer around.  Kristian Bush is no a part of a pretty famous country band, Sugarland!

Parent teacher conferences tonight went really well.  Almost all positives, only a couple of things for the boys to work on.  All in all, I couldn’t be more proud of them.  They’re a couple of great kids with good heads on their shoulders most of the time.  Of course, I’m very thankful for that.

But that’s not what I’m writing about today.  The thing I’m thankful for today is being able to look at them through a different lens.  In my head I have these expectations and perceptions of who they both are and how they both react to things.  Spending as much time with them as we do I can’t help it, I totally have paradigms of each of them and just expect that those thoughts are always correct.  Going to conferences reminds me that there is way more to the boys than I think.

Between seeing them interact with their teachers and other faculty I got to see different sides of their personalities.  Somethings were spot on with my ideas, but others were just a little different.  Watching Dominic’s confidence when talking with adults made me smile, I sometimes get worried that he’s a little too shy.  While I get anxious about Gavin’s ability to sit still and focus we see him calm down and focus on one thing at a time.  Hearing the stories, examples, and progress from the teachers helped me see other sides as well.  There were different strengths that I sometimes don’t recognize or pay enough attention to.  Dominic’s ability to work with anyone.  Gavin’s competitiveness and ability for great self-reflection.  There were so many nuggets from the night that I am having a tough time remembering them all.

It was a great reminder for me to watch the lens I’m wearing when I look at the world and try to see it for what it is, not what my brain is twisting it to be because of my previous experiences, preset paradigms, and false pretexts.  I still remember someone telling me long ago to envision the lint screen in a dryer.  Before interacting with others I need to remember to clean it out and start fresh.  That’s what the parent teacher conferences helped me do tonight, clean out the filter and see the people my boys are growing up to be.  I’m very thankful for the opportunity to see them clearly from a different angle.

Thanks!!!

Over the past couple of days Facebook has done a great job of reminding me that it was almost exactly four years ago that we adopted LuLu.  Two days ago it was a picture of Becky with Sky and LuLu the day we got her.  Yesterday it was a picture of the road trip I took to the south side of La Crosse to buy gloves for dodgeball.  The girls loved the ride and were snuggling in the backseat by the time we got home.  Today’s picture memory was from LuLu’s first ride on the boat.  She was nervous, but still smiling.

A little over four years ago Becky told me about a dog she had heard about on the radio that was looking for a home.  The dog had been found abandoned on a golf course, obviously starving, and recently had a litter of pups.  Becky showed me a picture of her as soon as I got home and when we saw how much they looked alike we knew what we had to do.  Skywalker was crazy energetic and we knew she’d love to have another friend in the house.  Next thing we knew we were in contact with Amber (which, on a side note, led us to a friendship with of our Ragnar buddies, Adam!) and we were set up with a time to introduce Skywalker to LuLu.  They got along great, even though I was a little weirded out by LuLu humping Sky, I’d never seen a female dog do that before!

While Sky and LuLu hit it off right away we definitely had struggles with LuLu early on.  She knew we were her new family and she was (& still is) very protective of us.  We kept working with her and training her to calm down, not be too nervous, and to relax when new people came into our house.  There were times when we were tempted to give up on her, but she was family and we knew we had to work it out with her.  She just needed a lot of love and we were able to give it to her.
We’re not sure what LuLu saw before we got her, but we’re pretty sure she must’ve seen physical abuse.  When the boys and I would wrestle she’d grab my hands with her mouth, put herself in between the boys and I, and cry. If Becky and I were goofing around she did the same.  When I was borrowing a punching bag from a friend and working out with it in the basement she had the same reaction.  It is sad to think about what she experienced, and it melts your heart when you realize that she’s trying to protect her pack.

LuLu still sometimes things she’s the alpha female in the house.  When Becky and I snuggle she tried to wiggle in between us.  If I want to tease LuLu I lift Becky’s shirt up just a little and rub her belly.  LuLu goes crazy!  She also still thinks there is something terribly wrong with my feet and she would lick them for hours if I didn’t tell her to stop.

I will usually grumble like the old man I sometimes am when we talk about our pets, but truth be told, I love that dog to death.  She might not always be the best listener when her nose gets in the way, but she is pretty awesome.  I can count on her to always be there to snuggle with, and she’s always happy to see me.  It doesn’t matter if I’m in a good mood or a bad one, she’s there to snuggle with regardless.  She’s one of our pack, and we wouldn’t be quite the same without her.

Thanks!!!

How often do I take life for granted?  How often am I just being as opposed to living?  How much of my most precious resource is squandered every day, even every hour?  How often do I take my family and friends for granted and just assume that they’ll be around forever?  Sadly, the answers to all of these questions are all the same…  More often than I care to admit.

Yesterday contained several events that brought that realization to the forefront of my brain.  Over the past 24-ish hours I’ve been able to digest some of it and see that I still have a very large gap to bridge.  While this blog has been helping appreciate things more there are still many spots where I’m lacking.

One of yesterday’s events that got my mind rolling was a Facebook post by a very good friend of mine.  His post was this,”Today is a day that I always give thanks to all the people in my life that I love. Take every chance you have to let them know how much you love them!”  As you can imagine, he lost someone he loves several years ago and this lone tree one on a rock in Sylvan Lake has special meaning to him.

Another conversation late in the night informed me that someone I love greatly is about to go through a very serious battle with cancer.  I fought hard to stay as stoic and strong as I could for the person who was telling me, but as soon as I had a moment of quiet to myself I was in tears.  How many times had I meant to call and I hadn’t?  How many times had I meant to write a blog about them and I hadn’t?  How many times have I just wanted to sit down with them and hear more of their incredible life’s story and I hadn’t?  Fortunately there is still time and I’m positive that they’ll kick cancer’s ass something fierce.

While I understand that life is not forever, why is it that I don’t think about that until I’m slapped in the face with that fact?  It seems that there should always be a focus on living life to its fullest and focused on what’s most important to me.

The two events yesterday reminded me of that we have only limited time to be us.  There’s no guarantee that we’ll have another sunset, another sunrise, or another full moon.  While I know that in the back of my head and have come to grips with that fact it is not until I feel the cold hand of the looming specter of death that I pay attention and remember to try to live my life that way.

This blog has helped me to keep my eyes open to more things to be thankful for (my boys are probably totally tired of hearing me say “Look at that beautiful sunset!” by now), but I need to keep an eye out for the more subtle reminders that our lives are not eternal and I need to be sure to live my life accordingly.

As an example, when I see things like this on a hike or while driving I need to soak it in and pause.  Today went to work pretty early and I took a hike over lunch.  While hiking I saw this tree, strong and seemingly healthy, uprooted and gone.  As I walked through the valley there were leaves falling around me like giant snowflakes, their purpose complete and going back to rest on the earth.  When I see these types of things I need to take a quick inventory of my life.  As Steve Jobs very eloquently put it, “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?”  In those fleeting moments when I just fill my time with nothingness, the stuff that I do because my brain is on cruise control, I need to remember these signs.

Life is too short, too fragile, and often taken for granted.  I am thankful for the reminders all around me that help me appreciate all that I have.  While some of them may be incredibly painful they are all reminders that I need to put energy and focus into living the life that I want to live.  I need to take action and enjoy every single second that I am very fortunate to have.

Thanks!!!

This evening I had the opportunity to be a guest speaker at Winona State University to help students learn the art of interviewing.  About a month ago I presented at Winona State to a group of Human Resources managers on how to start a career in HR.  In both cases I had fun and hope I was able to be a positive influence for the students.  I have two hopes from doing this.  One, that I help at least one student walk away with one idea that will help them find their future career.  The other hope is that I help light a spark in them to help others in the same way Tony Worley did for me.

As my college career was wrapping up back in 1999 and I was looking at career opportunities my dad hooked me up with a Sales Rep that he knew from the Twin Cities.  Tony was a pretty good guy and had offered to meet up with me and spend some time helping me learn how to write a resume and interview.  I’m sure part of his willingness to help was to help seal a sales deal with my dad, but based on his passion and enthusiasm I’m positive that there was more to it.

When Tony met with me he brought piles of old resumes, old interview notes, a book on interviewing, and tons of potential interview questions.  We spent the better part of a day discussing what worked and what didn’t in resume writing.  His thoughts were backed up with his experiences, of which he shared both positive and negative.  He was incredibly humble and candid while being very upbeat and optimistic.  There was no question that he was passionate about helping me be successful.  On the short term his help was a success, every interview I had (every single one) led to a job offer.

After we wrapped up we didn’t really speak afterwards.  It was before the days of email and LinkedIn and I was a foolish early twenties guy who didn’t realize the importance of maintaining relationships.  It is sad to admit, but I’m not even sure if I spelled his name correctly.   I’ve spent time looking him up online but to no avail.  Who knows, maybe someone who reads this blog will know someone who knows him and get it in front of him.

As I look back on where I am with my career and the successes I’ve had, I know they wouldn’t be quite the same without Tony’s help.  How crazy is it that one day with one person who I haven’t spoken with since helped to spark my passion for helping others with interviewing?  At the end of our time together I promised him that I would be sure to go out of my way to help someone else the way he helped me.  Little did either of us know that I would make a career out of it and work to inspire as many people as others to do the same.

Tony, wherever you are, thank you for the help and the advice.  Your time spent with me has started a ripple effect that I will continue to try to perpetuate.

Thanks!!!

We’ve been working on solving a challenge for one of our clients for a while now.  The situation is a little tough to explain without getting into confidential information, so let’s keep it at that.

In trying to find a solution we’ve had to look at several things in very different ways and we’ve brainstormed many ways to try to resolve the issue.  While we haven’t yet found the right solution we have had many very interesting and unique conversations as a result.

As we walk through some ideas we’re finding new ways to tackle some of our old challenges.  It’s kind of funny how you can solve something by focusing so hard on something completely different and all of a sudden BAM!!!  You see what you’ve been missing from the first situation.

It’s still frustrating that we haven’t been able to get things squared away on one front, but I’m thankful for going through the thinking processes that have led to many new ideas!

Thanks!!!

Audiobooks are pretty awesome, but talking several of my coaches is even more awesome.

While driving to Rice Lake today I had a great conversation with Norm.  We start off every Monday with a call to walk through the priorities for the week.  This week was focused on a couple of pretty specific things.  He did a great job of mixing up excellent questions, listening, pushing me to think differently, and helped me clarify some ideas and thoughts I had been working on recently.    As I got off the phone I was pretty surprised to see 30+ minutes had flown by in the blink of an eye.

On may from the Rice Lake office to Eau Claire I had a quick question so I dialed up Beth.  Recently back from a sweet vacation the happiness and high energy exuded from her even more than usual (which I didn’t even think was possible!).  We talked for a while about the benefits of unplugging from time to time to get our mindsets right and then jumped into business.  As always, she heard me out, offered up ideas, and supported my action plan.  More pumped and with a feeling of validation and some ways to improve my ideas, I drove  in silence so I could think.

A little while after talking with Beth the coaching calls were flipped and I got a call form Carolyn.  She had a relatively quick and easy question, but as most of you know, a short conversation with me is very much a rarity!  I had so much being able to listen to her team’s  successes with a recent new client – they did so well they have an opportunity to more than double their business with that client.  They’ve been working on this one for a very long time and seeing it come through had us all smiling from the sense of accomplishment.  To be honest, I’d been trying to land that same business ever since we opened her office over six years ago.  I am so happy for them and proud of their accomplishment.

As I was nearing Arcadia I got a phone call.  Normally I wait until I get through one of the dead spots on the other side of Arcadia, but when I saw it was Mark I answered.  He had a couple of ideas and questions and once we covered them we moved on to another topic.  We shared ideas, reminisced, and came up with new possible solutions.  Next thing we knew we were on another topic…  sharing ideas, remembering old war stories, and applying some of those ideas to some of today’s challenges.  Then we got on to another topic…  and so on, and so on.  Next thing I knew I had pulled into my driveway about 45 minutes after the call started.  It was awesome!  There’s just something about talking with Mark that leaves me feeling energized with new ideas, or in actuality, past ideas with a new twist that are very applicable to today’s situation.  Throw in the fact that he’s just flat out an awesome guy and I was smiling as we hung up.

While there have been so many things to be thankful for today, these coaching calls were an awesome surprise.  Having just finished one business audiobook, I had a new one loaded up and ready to go and that was going to be where my brain went for much of my road time today.  I’m very thankful that I was able to have some excellent mobile coaching calls instead!

Thanks!!!