First off, what a day we lived through 19 years ago. My heart goes out to everyone who was impacted by the horrific events of violence almost two decades ago. Quite honestly, that’s pretty much all of us, isn’t it? The impact to some was unimaginable, yet all of us who remember that day have been impacted in many other ways. One of the things I’m grateful for today are the crystal clear memories I still have from that day.

I was in the La Crosse Express office when the first jet hit. I still remember the conversation we had in those first few moments of not knowing what was going on. The topic of business we’d meant to discuss disappeared completely into the ether as the world paused. We asked how this could have happened, how did the pilot make an error like that, and what a tremendous loss of life in an accident. Quite honestly, the true loss of life hadn’t even begun to register in my brain.

While we tried to figure out what was happening the second jet hit. At that point we quickly started to see that something was going horribly awry. After some brief discussion I headed from the La Crosse office to the Winona office.

I’ll never forget the drive to Winona as it was possibly the most surreal of my life. At the time I was a huge fan of ESPN Radio and was listening to Tony Kornheiser. All idea of sports was gone, the only focus on what was happening all around us. The third jet had hit the Pentagon and Tony was broadcasting from Washington DC. He shared what he was hearing and seeing in a combination of first, second, and third hand accounts. At one point he was interrupted, was silent, and then apologized for going off the air as he’d been told to evacuate.

As soon as I got to Winona I remember frantically trying to open and refresh the CNN.com home page to get updates on what was happening. While this was going on I was also taking phone calls from our employees who weren’t sure if they were supposed to go into work that night. There’s one call in particular I’ll never forget as I did my best to calm him down from his panic and nervousness.

I don’t know that I watched as much news in my life as I did that day. Trying to keep up with what was actually happening felt impossible. Each story told brought up more and more emotion as the death tolls increased and the personal stories of victims were shared. As the stories of heroes from that day started to appear the emotions hit even harder.

That night Becky and I headed to the UW La Crosse campus and met with hundreds of others for a candlelight vigil and prayer service. On the way home we saw lines longer than any I’ve seen to this day for gas as none of us were quite sure what to expect next.

So why am I thankful for the crystal clear memories of that day filled with tragedy? In that day and next few afterwards the spirit of our country showed and we all healed as one, albeit for a brief moment. For one day it didn’t feel like there were differences in race, religion, economic class, or nationality. For a brief moment our society was full of love for each other, caring for each other, and comforting each other. We set down all of our petty arguments and worked together to heal. We were one country, founded on love for each other.

With all we have going on in the world today I can’t help but look to the way we all melded together as a nation 19 years ago and dream a beautiful possible future. 19 years ago we proved we could be one nation, all together, loving and respecting each other, the nation our founding fathers dreamt it would be. If we were that once before, we can be that again. As much as the memories of 9/11 still hurt they bring hope for a better tomorrow for our country. We’ve loved each other in the past, we can do it again.

Thanks!!!

Each Thursday at 11am my teams and shut everything down for 30-45 minutes. In that brief period of time the whirlwind of our jobs disappears and we’re 100% focused on growth and development focused specifically on one of our core values.

For the values of Grit and Growth Mindset we read the books Grit and Mindset. Each week we’d read a chapter and someone would lead the conversation.

My teams had a great idea on how to tackle the value Do Right. Each week one person sends out an article, a video, or some other type of learning opportunity to the team. On Thursday that teammate leads the discussion on that topic.

This week was a prime example of why I am so grateful for this growth focused time on Thursdays. Grant picked out this video: https://youtu.be/5oLfB3tIyHM that shares the story of how one business has gone to extraordinary steps to make an incredible impact in the lives of people in their community. Not gonna lie, there was a case of the feels going on when I watched it.

While we talked about it as a team it was clear to see that many of us were starting to see bigger dreams of how we could make a bigger impact on those in our community. Sure, the ideas were a little different than the video, but it got the conversation going. As we talked it was clear to see that we all were envisioning a future greater than the one we’d seen before watching this video and having this conversation.

It is so easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of daily activity. In the blink of an eye we can lose sight of the bigger picture and focus on what is directly in front of us. When we get too busy we don’t take the time to dream a new future. By taking time to pause, focus, and dream we are able to create a better future than we’d imagined. How awesome is that?

Thursday Learning Sessions help remind us to pause and dream bigger. They remind us to pause and think. They remind us to focus on growth and learning. It’s not always easy and there are always trade offs made to be focused and present on Thursday, but I’ll gladly make those trade offs any time.

Thanks!!!

Over the past couple of weeks I’ve mentioned reading the book Waking Up White by Debby Irving. That book led me to some incredible revelations that I’d never noticed before. The power of the author’s story helped me widen my perspective significantly. Over the past week or so I’ve been put some of the ideas to work and have been happy with the results. For clarity, the widening of my perspective led to different actions than I would have taken before reading the book.

On my drive home from Eau Claire today I had a choice to make. I could listen to a wonderful fiction or I could continue to widen my perspective. It took a moment, but I made the right choice and started White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo. In a short period of time I started to see how this would help in similar and yet different ways from Waking Up White and I was immediately glad I started listening to it.

At the time when certain others I may have blogged about recently start taking action to block certain types of diversity training it is more important than ever for all of us to learn what blind spots we may have in our perspective. If anyone has interest in discussing these books and some of the ideas they’ve learned from them please let me know, I’d love to have that conversation! If there are other books you’d recommend to help continue to widen my perspective please let me know, I’d love to queue them up!

My Facebook memories from today left me smiling from ear to ear. Two years ago my buddies and I had one of our more epic weekends together up in Minneapolis. The entire weekend was full of hanging out, chilling, joking, gaming, and just existing with each other. It was awesome!!!

Seeing this picture reminded me of how grateful I am for all of the times we’ve gotten together to hang out in real life (IRL) as we have. COVID and social distancing has prevented us from getting together IRL, but it can’t take away all of the great memories we’ve already created together.

After dinner tonight we went for a walk as a family. It was cold, dreary, rainy, and was getting dark earlier than normal, but I could’ve cared less. This tradition we’ve started through COVID is something I look forward to doing many nights each week. For a brief pause there is no news, there are no phones, there is no COVID, and there is no stress. There is only 100% focused family time while doing physical activity. How awesome is that?

Thanks!!!

Three day weekends might be about one of my favorite things in the world. Having a bonus day at home is kind of like taking just over a week for a vacation. It usually takes a day or two to relax and settle in on vacation and then sometimes my brain starts looking ahead a couple of days before the vacation is over. By going just over a week my brain has almost a full week to totally chill. A three day weekend is very similar, the one bonus day just brings a deeper state of chill.

Imagine my surprise when I found out we had an extension to the long weekend, well kind of. Gavin’s soccer practice was cancelled due to weather. Due to Dominic’s bike injury he took the night off from workmen out to rest up and heal. This meant we had zero agenda for the night. Coming hot off a long weekend it felt like I’d gotten a bonus night off!

In that bonus time I spent time talking on the phone with family. Becky and I went for a walk in the very light rain. We busted out a family game of the card game Golf. Now we’re all chilling by either reading or writing to wrap up the night before bed. Heck, I’ll be in bed before 8:30!

A long weekend is great, but a bonus night is pretty amazing too! I’m so grateful for pauses from real life like this that seem to pop up out of the blue.

Thanks!!!

First off, you may read this as a political post. Please note that the intent is far from that. Rather, when thinking on all I’ve seen, read, and heard over the past four plus years it is more a list of lessons I’ve learned through my observations of a bully. It would be easy to pound my chest and shout my political and ideological beliefs for all to hear (though none would most likely listen). In taking what I’ve learned through my journey of gratitude I would rather reflect on how I can live a better life from these experiences.

I also know that in writing this some may get frustrated with me, disagree with me, make judgements about me, and so on. I understand; unfortunately I understand all too well. I’ve often made the mistake of judging others off of something so simple as a yard sign. Part of what I’m writing about today is my reminder to myself of just how wrong that practice is and an ongoing reminder to myself that if I am to close the gap between who I am and who I am called to be I must continue to work on eliminating this thought process from my life.

The definition of a bully per Merriam-Webster is:

a blustering, browbeating person especially : one who is habitually cruel, insulting, or threatening to others who are weaker, smaller, or in some way vulnerable

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/bully

Again, it would be easy to judge and condemn a bully, wouldn’t it? From the outside we can see their cruelty and the impact their hatred and disdain for others has on the people impacted by them. It would be so easy to have hatred for them and wish them ill will, but wouldn’t that reduce us to their level? So how should we handle a bully?

Hurting others is never right and cannot be allowed or accepted. That must be addressed. Taking action to help others must happen to correct the situation.

In my humble opinion, the first thing to be done is a pause to reflect on ourselves and our own actions and intentions. How often have we battled anger with anger, hate with hate, and fear with fear? How does this fair? Never well. What best can quell anger, hate, and fear is calm, love, and hope. Before finding a way to take action against the bully we must first pause and find our inner calm within the storm, find a way to love our fellow human – even a bully, and hope for a better future. If we react like the bully are we not but a bully ourselves, a bully with different intent? Does that make us better than the one we hope to change?

Personally, I’ve struggled with this as I have seen President Trump as a bully. Through my eyes he fits the very definition shared above. Sadly, I haven’t taken the action to do what I described in the previous paragraph. Instead I’ve displayed those same bullying traits towards him. Part of the reason I’m writing this blog today is to help myself get my brain back into the right space.

One of the best ways I’ve learned to clear my head and find calm, love, and hope is to take time to learn from the actions of someone; especially through those I severely dislike. This is especially beneficial with someone I despise as I can’t help but find ways in which I’ve done the same. It hurts to find that commonality between my actions and those of someone I dislike, but it also helps remind me to hope for a better future. If I can find a way to change and grow so can the other person.

So what have learned while examining the actions of the bully and then looking at my own life through that same lens? This list is not all inclusive but hits home and reminds me of the gap I need to close in my own life.

• Name calling is easy, never the right decision, and causes flare ups of unnecessary emotion. How often in my life have I labeled someone to minimize the issue, laugh something off, or demean the person? Has this ever proven effective? No, not in any meaningful way. If I truly treat others with dignity, respect, and love the actions of name calling, labelling, and judging have no useful purpose and make me no better than a bully. When have I used this tactic? Usually when I don’t have a solid logical argument or can’t find (or won’t be bothered to find) a better way to explain my thoughts and when my emotions gets the best of me and I lose my sense of calm.
• Treating some as better than others is not the right way. There is no one sex, race, religion, sexuality, social class, economic class, or any other possible differences that makes any one human being more significant, valuable, or important than any other. When have I treated one group as superior to another? How often have I unintentionally acted in a way that showed a difference? What biases do I hold that I can change and learn from? How can I better stay open minded to the sacredness of each human being? Each human life is important and equal, how can I better treat them that way?
• Using fear as a driver to motivation is not right. This thinking usually focuses on limited and fixed opportunities, keeping an open mind and abundance thinking lead to better outcomes. How have I moved others to action through fear? What would have been different had I focused on helping to find new opportunities for better outcomes instead of focusing on limited opportunities? Had I led with visions of hope and opportunity how would the outcomes have improved?
• Treating everyone the same is not the same as fostering equality. Some people need significantly more help than others which means that not everyone should be treated the same. What do I mean by this? If someone has been oppressed, beaten down, or held back in some way they need additional help and resources to help them get back up on their feet. This is a core tenant of so many religions and philosophies – we must help others who need help. What this means is that to treat everyone equally means some people need more help than others. When have I gotten frustrated that someone has gotten more than me? How have I reacted when I felt something wasn’t “fair”? How can I better respond to help others who need more than I do? When someone feels someone else got more than they did how can I help them understand that this is right? If someone or groups of someone have been oppressed for so long how can I remind myself that they need more to bring them back up which means that others will not necessarily receive the same? This is a difficult one to remember, but easier when I think of my lessons in Scouts… “to help other people at all times…”

These are amongst the lessons that come to mind over the past four years. I’ve got so far to go to close that gap between who I am and who I am called to be. As difficult as it may be to swallow at times I am grateful for the lessons I’ve learned from a bully over the past four years. Yes, it would have been great to have learned lessons from a wise, decent, open minded, and loving leader of our nation over these past four year, but that was not what we’ve had. Full disclosure, I am certain we will most likely not have that in the next four years regardless of the results in November. What I will have is the opportunity to learn more lessons from someone to help me live a life closer to that which I feel is right.

Oh yeah, I did maybe mention something else I was thankful for in the title. Yes, I am incredibly grateful for the 22nd amendment today as well. Regardless of who wins the election in November I know I will only have to learn from them for approximately eight years in total. I can survive anything for eight years, and so will our nation.

Thanks!!!

LOL – today I was going to write about a handful of different things. There was a wide variety of gratitudes throughout the day. From simple things like beautiful sunrises and walks after eating. There were slightly deeper thoughts like the joy of creating something for others. At times I started going way deep on a few other issues such as equality and doing right for others. So many different directions I could have gone.

Yet what am I out thankful for today?

A safe and healthy family. A wonderful day with those I love. Time together, time alone, time with family. What more could I ask for?

Simple, complex, surface, and deep all at the same time.

Thanks!!!

Today’s been a pretty chill Saturday at home; exactly what the doctor ordered. Nothing like the first day of a long weekend setting the tone for the rest of the weekend.

Biking to yoga and back got the blood flowing. Some physical activity to kick off the day helped set the productive tone that continued through most of the day.

Back at home I tagged in on cleaning the living room. Funny how something that seems like work can be oddly relaxing when done in with the right mindset. Spending time moving furniture and cleaning under it was oddly calming and rewarding.

After lunch we pulled out Settlers of Catan and busted out a family battle. I’m always thankful for the time we spend around the kitchen table playing games and hanging out as a family.

Up I went to the workshop I went afterwards. I had an hour or so before heading to church so I took advantage of the time. There were a couple of projects I was working on that have been gathering dust over the past couple of months so I dove back in. I was surprised at how much progress I was able to make in a short period of time. By the time I had to head down it felt like I’d had more like a few hours by myself up there.

After church we hit the grocery store and knocked out almost the last of what I wanted to accomplish for the day. When we got home I had the idea to pre-make the egg bake for breakfast / brunch tomorrow before I finally settled in to type.

Now that I’m on the couch I’m feeling a great sense of accomplishment, a deep state of relaxation, and am ready for a day of relaxing on the river tomorrow… ahhh… what a great start to the long weekend!

Thanks!!!

Tonight’s blog post is pretty simple. The past week and change has been very full and busy. All good, there’s just a lot going on in life at present. In one of our team wrap up calls this afternoon we all shared what we were most excited for this upcoming long weekend. While others shared fun activities like camping and kayaking my answer was pretty basic… chillin’.

After work was done I ran to the grocery store to pick up some hornet spray to help Dominic complete his self-set goal of eliminating the three hornets nests at our house. I helped him out, put a few things away, and then it was go time…

I grabbed this beauty that came in the mail today, plopped myself on the couch, brought the dogs up to snuggle with me, and I proceeded to chill and read.

In just a few short pages I was hooked in an awesome story focused on gratitude. I’m sure there’ll be a separate blog post about it in the future after I’ve finished reading it – just a hunch.

After a few chapters I fired up a frozen pizza. Next thing I knew I was still sitting on the couch, eating pizza right off the cardboard atop the coffee table, and still reading. Once the pizza was devoured I cleaned up, sat back on the couch, snuggled with the dogs, and started reading all over again.

Once Dominic was done fighting hornets we went out on the deck and I went right back to reading.

Kicking back on the couch, snuggling in with a great book, and tuning out the rest of the world was exactly what I needed tonight. Throw in the fact that the book is all about gratitude and it became even more perfect.

Thanks!!!

This morning I got up and moving early, jumped on my bike, and headed out for an early morning ride. Riding in the dark while the world is waking up is an excellent way to chill while getting exercise. Sure, there were a few cars, but it was so much more peaceful and quiet than normal. I am thankful for the mornings when I’m disciplined enough to get up and moving while the rest of the world sleeps.

Over lunch I took a quick ride to a quiet little place in Winona that is a little secluded. I quickly ate while I sat in the car. The windows were down, the moon roof was open, and the sun was pouring in. Without hesitation I set the timer on my watch and proceeded to take a quick nap in the sun. A twenty minute snooze later and I was feeling ready to take on the world again!

When I put today in perspective I am thankful for the pockets of solitude I was able to carve out for myself. There was a lot going on today, many moving parts, and I spent time engaging with quite a few people. In the moments with others I was able to focus (and was very thankful for the time one of my teammates called me out when I wasn’t!) it was largely due to the moments of solitude helping to keep me focused. Having space to think really helps me function at the right level.

So today I’m thankful for occasional solitude, calm, and quiet. There’s so much more I can accomplish when I remember to carve out time to be still and enjoy the quiet.

Thanks!!!

My mind has been racing in a few different directions for today’s post. True to form I’m going to go with the strategy that has helped me hatch many ideas in the past… only write the first part of the title (Day 1,436 – Thankful for…) and then process and work it all out as I type.

There are a few things I’ve really been focused on today. The power of presence in the ability to focus on the beauty of nature really captured my attention. In order to continue practicing yoga without risk of COVID we’ve been going during the week at a local park. We all space out well beyond the six feet and practice while the instructor gives directions a little more loudly than normal.

One of the things I appreciate most about yoga is the focus on the present through focusing on my breath. In doing so I find myself more “in” the present than normal. There’s typically no inner monologue going on or anything, just a focus on the sensations of my body as I move from pose to pose. Tonight there were several things in nature that caught my attention. There were two squirrels running and playing nearby. When we all turned to do a twist in their direction they froze in their tracks and just watched. It was awesome! Throughout practice some nests of flying ants seemed to erupt as the sun hit them just right. A times it looked as is thousands of them were literally pouring out of the ground like fireworks. There were so many I could hear their buzz when relaxing. Yes, bugs can be kind of gross, but there was a very cool feeling to this hatching. Both of the flying ants and the squirrels would have been totally missed had I not been focused on the present.

What if I were more present more often in all of my life? What other beauty would I find that I may otherwise pass by without noticing? Today was a great reminder of the beauty of stillness.

Something else I’m thankful for are friends who give the honest feedback I crave. In working on a project I got in touch with an old friend and asked for their feedback. While most of it was positive they did an excellent job of pointing out potential mistakes and how I could improve the product. It was pretty awesome.

At my core there is something that continues to build. In some ways it’s almost as if there’s about to be a storm. The pressure is building and I am liking where it is all going. Sometimes the best ideas need time to truly ferment and I’m going to give this one all the time it needs to be ready. As I close in on five years of blogging each day I’m starting to see patterns and cycles in my life and my response to the world. Putting these thoughts into a cohesive whole is starting to building my brain and is something I’m looking forward to putting into words. Sometimes when a storm comes it’s best to take shelter. Other times I get giddy with anticipation and sit out on the deck to admire its majesty as it rolls in. I’ll be sitting on the deck for this one.

Thanks!!!