One of the ways my brain is wired to thing is through comparison. I’m continually comparing something to something else to see which is better and how the other could be improved. In a vacuum and focused on two things that are unrelated to me comparison is a wildly important and effective tool. The process of comparing things is a beautiful scalpel to cut away the extraneous and get to the root of why one thing is more effective or better than the other.

While comparison is a fantastic tool in comparing ideas, things, and whatnot it is a terrible tool to live my life by. A recent quote from the Tim Ferris’s podcast with Jim Collins (yes, I listened to it again!) hit the nail on the head:

“Comparison is the primary sin of modern life.”

Michael Ray

Jim goes on to share that the days when he feels the least fulfilled there are often moments of comparison between him and someone else. What do they have versus what he has? What have they done compared to what he has done? What have they created compared to what he has created? In those moments there is only discontentment.

Over the past couple of weeks I’ve had several reminders of the ills of comparison. In some situations I was envious of what others had done and created. Sometimes I wished had more success like someone else. I wanted their ability to see the world differently or to have had the opportunities that they’ve had. Nothing crazy, but enough that as I look back I can see that those times involved feelings of discontentment.

I’ve also had situations going in the other direction when I was comparing myself to others to make myself feel better. Seeing how I’d already learned from the experiences I’ve had while they hadn’t. This is also certainly did not lead to joy or contentment. It may have made me feel momentary happiness, but it was quickly followed by the regret of realizing I was essentially deriving happiness from the misfortune of others. Another example of comparison gone bad.

In each of those types of solutions I was allowing myself to be lured into the appeal of personal comparison. What’s funny is that I already know and actively practice the antidote to personal comparison…

Gratitude.

If I am instead grateful for what I have, where I am, and for what I’ve experienced there is no room for personal comparison. When I feel the clutches of comparison / envy / jealousy / schadenfreude grasping at me I need to remember to pause and be thankful instead. Yes, there is always more to learn, more to do and more ways to grow, but if I am thankful for what I have I will not be lured away. As a philosopher once put it, “happiness is not having what you want, it is wanting what you have.”

Jim goes in a slightly different direction when he feels the lure of personal comparison drawing him in. He focuses on creating something new. His mindset is that in creating something new there is nothing to compare it to. This seems like a wonderful strategy also and I plan on trying to adopt it into my practice as well.

Is my way right or is Jim’s the correct way to conquer comparison? It really doesn’t matter, does it? There is only what works for each of us in the moment as we find the discontentment that comparison always leads us to eventually.

Thanks!!!

I stayed up way later than normal last night to watch a movie with Gavin. Needless to say I slept in later than usual this morning. After getting out of bed Becky and I made the plan of hitting the grocery store before it got busy. I made the bed and then hopped in the shower.

Switching from scalding hot water after a minute or so to cold water for the remaining several minutes of the shower still takes a bit of willpower. Even though I love the sensation of the cold shower it still takes a little focus to talk myself into it. Listening to the right music really helps. I fired up a song I’d really enjoyed on Pandora yesterday and got to it.

As the song Shots (Broiler Remix) by Imagine Dragons (check it out here if you’d like it as background music while you read this) blasted from my iPhone I started moving and grooving in the cold water. My body flipped from hot to freezing and I could feel the endorphins kick in as I gasped. Within a couple of seconds I went from frozen shock to having a cold water jam session loaded up with a 100% natural high. Who ever would’ve thought I could have so much fun in a cold shower??? After Shots wrapped up I slid right over to Lucky by Daft Punk and got a few extra minutes of cold water blasting me.

The entire day I’ve been moving nonstop and riding that high. That cold shower jam session really set the tone for the day!

Thanks!!!

After dropping Dominic off at the ski hill this morning I stopped off at the post office. Even though the postal workers were cruising through customers very rapidly there was still a substantial line. Everyone was being totally chill, giving space, and there were a lot of smiles (everyone was wearing masks, but now that we’re all getting used to recognizing “eye smiles” you know what I mean). One thing was a little off that I didn’t quite notice right away… it was crazy quiet in there. No music and no one was talking, it was almost completely silent.

From behind me I heard someone come in and start joking around with the person in front of them. They were obviously smiling and in a cheerful mood and started talking about where the line should go to help everyone feel more comfortable. I smiled to myself and was immediately grateful for their cheerfulness on a dreary morning while waiting in line. Within seconds I was thinking about possibly blogging about being thankful for his cheerful spirit.

And that’s when something happened that was out of a movie.

“It’s way to quiet in here… Who’s up for some Christmas carols?”

Before anyone could say no the same individual burst into song!

“We wish you a merry Christmas…”

Before he got to “merry” another person jumped in. By the time “Christmas” finished almost everyone in the post office was singing along with him. It was like a scene right out of a movie!

Yes, thanks to the mask I was playing the role of the dad from Elf and was mouthing along. Quite honestly, I was mouthing as I didn’t trust myself to maintain my composure if I started to sing. I was already battling “the feels” thanks to to the emotions fo a post office full of people singing together.

I’m so thankful for the person who started the singing. Many years ago one of my favorite pastors made the comment “God takes action and moves through people in the form of the Holy Spirit.” For some readers I know this will sound crazy, but there was a presence of something greater than the people in the building with all of us in that moment.

In that moment there were no political parties, different economic classes, different skin colors, or anything. There was no COVID, there was no unrest, there was no hate. There were only people sharing a moment full of peace and love together. The overwhelming feeling of joy was palpable. I wish I could describe it better, but that’s really it. The entire room was filled with love.

To think, a situation that usually causes frustration became a moment which had a profound impact on my soul which I’ll never forget. The part that has stuck with me all day is that there is no reason why I didn’t start the singing. How often could I have helped create a moment like that for others if I would’ve put my ego aside and thought of how to raise up others? How often have I added to the negativity of a difficult situation as opposed to creating a moment of overwhelming love? When confronted with a line in the true how will I respond – with quiet repose as I did today or with the singing, joy, and zeal of the gentleman who created a moment forever embedded in my heart? I hope to stay strong and be the light as he chose to be today.

Thanks!!!

Today is one in which I’m thankful for pausing to be thankful. There have been moments in my day when I’ve felt a little down. Nothing awful or anything, just a light dose of dissatisfaction for zero good reason whatsoever. Kind of like the changing of the seasons or lack of light – nothing brought due to work, family, friends, or life – just like I need a little more sunlight or something. What’s been interesting is that whenever that feeling has crept up it’s been gratitude that has swatted that subtle “off-ness” away.

What was I grateful for that helped raise my spirits? I thought you’d never ask 😉

All day long I’ve smiled as I thought of an incredible social media experience a good friend recently had. Great things happen to great people, especially when they need them most. Kelsey’s favorite band played a song specifically for her yesterday – how awesome is that??? The song itself is incredibly symbolic and a virtually perfect 2020 theme – Hang On by Guster.

Today was the first day of snowboarding season for Dominic. It was awesome to see how excited he was for the opportunity to get out on the hill and do what he’s been looking forward to for the past 10 months or so. The joy he radiated has had me smiling all day and I’m grateful for his opportunity to do something he loves.

Work was pretty awesome today for many reasons. There was an excellent sales success, some great teammate successes, and it was a day filled with the feeling of positive progress. While I don’t want to get into too many details I felt like I was living into my purpose on several occasions and I’m thankful for that feeling.

Becky pointed out a Facebook post one of our favorite old haunts had put up. La Cave at La Chateau downtown is by far and away one of my favorite places to hang out when there’s not a pandemic. Their smoked drinks are mind-blowing. Picking one up for home tonight has had me smiling (and I’ve only had a little so far!). I’m grateful for a little smoky taste of normalcy.

When someone shares their gratitude it’s a pretty awesome thing. Completely out of the blue and totally unprompted came a letter from someone I’ve known for many years. The letter shared how grateful they are for the impact I’ve had on their life. Let’s just say there may have been a little awesome leaking out of my eyes when I read it. That letter will be saved and pulled back out in those moments when I need a pick me up. I’m incredibly grateful for those kind words and can’t begin to express just how full it made my heart today.

So many moments of gratitude to combat a slightly off day. How awesome is that? I am thankful for each and every person who had such a positive impact on me today, thank you for keeping me in a good mood!

Thanks!!!

The majority of my drive to Winona this morning was spent with one thing on my mind – the breathtaking sunrise behind me. It was one of those awesome ones when the sky starts changing into that deep dark red on the horizon. There was a beam of light that slowly ascended from the earth to the heavens and stood like a pillar without any peek at the sun below it. The sky slowly shifted to all different shades of purple and pink as the sun slowly rose. Even though I was viewing it largely from my mirrors it took my breath away. How awesome to view such a spectacular sight in the morning? Having all of it unfold above the bluffs and the Mississippi made it all the more majestic. I’m grateful for those moments of extreme natural beauty.

On one of my seven Zoom/Teams calls today I was laughing pretty hard. We were talking about “way back in the day” and having to actually pay for long distance calls. My friend Justin reminded me of one of the items almost every college student had back in the mid to late ’90’s… a phone card. This was the wonderful piece of plastic that was pre-loaded with a certain number of minutes so you could call home and talk without having to pay for long distance. I still remember burning through many of those back in the day when I’d call my parents at a very reasonable hour – usually after 10pm!

The phone card in of itself isn’t what I’m really grateful for today, but rather a symbol of something I’m thankful for. Think about it – that was only 20-25 years ago! Isn’t it wild to think of just how far technology has come in such a short period of time? I can’t remember the last time I looked at a phone bill that showed long distance charges other than when I leave the country.

It also reminded me of my first “real” job when I got my first pager. Just over 21 years ago I was mesmerized by my ability to see baseball scores being updated in almost real time when I wasn’t by a TV, computer, or radio. I still have a couple of old fantasy football magazines from back in the day showing the newer and fancier versions of the pager. What a change over a couple of decades!

What I’m thankful for is the reminder to pause and be grateful for what we have, while imaging a better tomorrow. Sometimes it’s easier to appreciate something when I can look back to something from the past to remind myself of how much better life is today. That little mention of a “phone card” did just that for me today.

Thanks!!!

This evening our Winona, MN team completed a focus group of our employees to pick their brains on many topics related to employment. Without giving away any spoilers it was an incredible success! In addition to the wealth of ideas and information we were able to receive there was no short supply of compliments as well. I was very grateful for the opportunity for my team to hear about all of the great work they’ve been doing firsthand from the people they serve on a daily basis.

What really struck me was just how differently I assumed some people saw the world. In my head I thought I had many of the motivations figured out. I’ve been doing this for so many years I thought it would all tie back to what I’ve learned throughout that time. Sure, there were some pretty staple answers too, but there were many more times in which I was left surprised.

Back in the day I was fortunate to be selected to go to a training in London, Ontario focused on thinking with an “Outside In” mindset rather than an “Inside Out” mindset. Using the Outside In approach you gather info from outside the organization and use it to drive strategy. Inside Out is making assumptions from within and then taking action. Of course it is clear to see that Outside In is the preferred method, but it is so easy to put the blinders on without knowing it and to think Inside Out.

The focus group today was an excellent reminder of why it is important to take a step back and get that outside opinion. The insights we gleaned will have an impact on our strategy and direction and I’m so thankful for them. I can honestly say our 2021 will be even more successful as a result of having that knowledge.

Where else in life should I remember to pause and listen to outside voices? Maybe not just listen to them, but actively seek them out. This is a lesson that will bounce through my brain for many months I’m sure.

Thanks!!!

Whew!!! What a day it’s been! From an early morning drive up north to time in the workshop with Dominic tonight it’s been a full one.

There are a handful of things I’d like to blog about, but they aren’t things that can always be shared in detail. I know, sounds suspenseful, right? Totally not intentional, and certainly nothing scandalous. Here are some of the high level highlights:

• Laying in bed after waking up and seeing how low I can drop my heart rate (39bpm)
• Reading my daily Stoic meditation before getting up
• Re-listening to the Jim Collins podcast I wrote about last night and gleaning more ideas and insights
• Enjoying the quiet and calm of being in an office before anyone else comes in
• Enjoying the rapidly increasing sounds of teammates coming into the office
• Learning from past mistakes
• Seeing others view mistakes as their biggest successes as it was an opportunity for hem to learn (living the Growth Mindset)
• Learning from the advice of mentors
• Patience – from others, for others
• Well timed jokes
• Having the confidence to say no to potential business deal that isn’t a favorable one
• Seeing how excited Becky is when she’s talking about her work day
• Teaching Dominic how to grill
• The smells of different species of sawdust
• The stinging in my eyes from sawdust
• Learning I can get my favorite Old Fashioneds to go
• The weight of LuLu leaning up against me as she whines and insists I should be rubbing her belly instead of typing my blog

There are those and so many other moments of awesomeness in my life for which I’m grateful for today.

Life, thanks for all you gave me today – the good, the bad, the motivating, the frustrating, and everything in between. I’m grateful for each moment and the opportunity to exist today.

Thanks!!!

Last week I caught a new podcast in my feed that stopped me in my tracks. Tim Ferriss was interviewing Jim Collins. If you’d like to check it out you can find it here: The Tim Ferriss Show Transcripts: Jim Collins on The Value of Small Gestures, Unseen Sources of Power, and More (#483) – The Blog of Author Tim Ferriss

Jim Collins is by far and away my favorite business strategy author. Meeting him almost three years ago knocked off #17 on my dream list. The way his brain works is nothing short of incredible. When making an important business decision I can virtually guarantee that his advice from one of his books (including Good to Great and Great by Choice) will be running through my brain.

Hearing his interview with Tim blew my mind even more than I ever would have expected. What I appreciate about Jim’s style is his inquisitiveness, logic, and thought process. While I of course got some of his sage like business advice as well, what really has had me thinking often came from several other directions. Here’s just a short snippet of some of the topics / thoughts that have had me thinking long since first listening to it.

• What is it that really drives you?
• Seeking out and appreciating the dichotomy of “light” and “dark” forces our heroes exhibit. Seeing the jump from their difficult times to their peaks.
• “30 years and 30 minutes” – how the past dean of admissions at Princeton makes great admission decisions. The example of the potential student who’s vocation of choice was demolition derby.
• The power of spontaneous gratitude for someone
• The importance of preparation and deep research
• The many lessons that can be gleaned from reading biographies and autobiographies
• The power of questions and curiosity in business

So many wonderful stories and concepts from this podcast that my mind is still reeling. I’m so thankful for hearing this podcast, I am excited to listen to it again tomorrow on my drive to let it fully sink in.

Thanks!!!

Over the past few Christmases we’ve offered the boys the option of gifts or a vacation. Part of the reasoning behind it is to help them learn to appreciate experiences more than stuff. The deeper we’ve gone into the pandemic the more we’ve all appreciated the travel we’ve done in the last. There have been many times the conversation will go back to some excellent memories we have made together while on vacation.

This year has obviously been different and vacations aren’t really on the agenda until more gets sorted out with COVID. That said, there’s one we’ve got planned for June of next year that it would be very difficult for COVID to disrupt. Through Scouts we’re going to backpack as we hike across Isle Royale all 40+ miles.

Instead of travel itself we went back to the well in a different way and got the boys a Christmas gift geared towards travel – nice backpacking bags. As luck would have it we found some at REI in Appleton last night and picked up their Christmas presents early (I also got an early Christmas present of Chick-fil-A in the drive through, but that’s another blog for another day 😉).

Rather than wrapping them up and putting them under the tree we busted them out for a trial run this morning. Loading up for church had me chuckling to myself. It wasn’t just us loading up like usual, it was each of bringing hiking clothes to change into and the boys and I each loading fully packed backpacks into the back of the car. As soon as we left church we hit County Road B, parked, and took off on a 5 mile test hike with the packs.

Not only was it fun busting out Christmas presets early, but it caused so much conversation about the upcoming trip (only a couple of months away). Sure, it wasn’t the same as actually traveling, but all of the parts that make family travel awesome were rolled into one. We had time as a family. We were outside doing physical activity together. We talked about travel memories. We talked about future travel. It was a crazy mini-vacation while we prepped for a future vacation.

Thanks!!!

Today was an awesome dose of normalcy that I’m extremely grateful for. Thanks to a combination of a few factors we were able to spend time with my little brother and his family without any fear of COVID. The hours flew by and I enjoyed every minute of it.

Hanging out with my brother. Meeting my new little nephew, Cooper. Spending time with my niece, Lauren. Talking with my sister in law, Jennifer. My boys hanging out with their Uncle Nick. Shooting the bull, watching a little football, eating lunch together, and chilling. How perfect is that?

For a handful of hours there was no pandemic – a perfect bubble of normalcy.

Thanks!!!