LOL – so my inspiration for today’s blog came from earlier today, but I was just reminded of why I’m thankful for this after attempting to write my blog in the living room while Gavin watches an episode of Parks and Rec.

When we learn something new and put it to use it is very helpful. When we practice that new skill it becomes more useful. When we blend in other skills we can turn it into a habit.

With so much focus on what I am putting my thoughts and energy towards I really looked at today very differently than I would have a couple of weeks ago. Instead of attempting to pack too much in I kept some flexibility. When things started to twist a bit off course I paused, took a deep breath, and created a buffer. I realized I’d set a self-imposed deadline that wasn’t necessary. Putting the busy-ness of the day with the newly re-learned concept of having a buffer I made a move that significantly lifted stress off my shoulders while simultaneously creating more space for me to perform better at what needed to be done. A couple of weeks ago I would’ve plowed right through and not completed as much as well.

One of the things that made a big difference today was adding a thought process from Atomic Habits to Essentialism to help me embed the behavior I wanted to live. The exact thought exercise was to pause and think, “how would someone who was an incredible essentialist respond to this moment? How would they react?” In removing myself from the situation the solution was clear. Move back the deadline and create some buffer space. Once I had that answer I moved ahead and felt much better.

There was another habit I started using a similar mindset. Gavin’s practices for soccer are at 5:30 and end at 7:00pm. Two nights each week I take him and Dominic to Gavin’s practice, drop him off, go to the YMCA with Dominic, weight lift, and then pick up Gavin. When I think about what’s important to me this habit covers so many bases. I get to spend time with my boys, I get 1 on 1 time with Dominic, I get to exercise and become more fit, and I have the opportunity to make Becky’s life a little easier. Talk about wins all around! Instead of packing random stuff in or dropping off, going home, driving back, and picking him up I am able to use that time to live into how I feel the true version of me should live. It feels great!

As I started the blog with, there was another reminder of progress I am thankful for today. I need to eliminate the distractions when I want to get something done. I thought I had the will power to resist the urge to watch the TV show with Gavin while I typed, but I was wrong. After watching for several minutes I realized I needed to eliminate the opportunity to not focus so I headed downstairs and am blogging where it is quiet and peaceful. Am I going to stay focused and head straight to bed? That is yet to be decided 😉

Today I’m thankful for the opportunity to practice the ideas I’ve been working on and to hone my thought processes instead of letting my old bad habits control my day.

Thanks!!!

Talk about beautiful bookends to the day. This morning Becky woke me up early so we could get our bike ride in and we caught a brilliant red sunrise. This evening we went for a walk a little later than normal and caught a brilliant orange sunset. Nice bit of symmetry for the day!

What a lesson I learned today! There’s been a pile of old project supplies I’ve needed to take back to the store for quite some time. When I got all the old receipts together and got everything ready to take back I noticed something odd on all the receipts. There was a date in which you could no longer return something. I was furious! I figured I’d still go to return them, but the entire way there I was thinking about how they would say no, how I would try to negotiate, how I would ask for the manager, and the tizzy I would throw when they denied me. I should go back and look at my heart rate monitor, I’m sure I had quite the spike for 15-ish minutes. I was so wound up I had to take a couple of deep breaths before I walked into the store.

Guess what happened?

“No problem at all, let’s get everything rung up. Would you prefer cash or in store credit for everything? Would you like it to be one transaction or several?” asked the service desk person with a huge smile.

I couldn’t help but laugh at myself all the way home. How foolish for me to worry and get worked up? Not only did it do zero good, but it was totally unnecessary. With everything I’ve talked about with gratitude and presence it was disappointing to lapse like that. That said, I am thankful for the experience as it reminded me how much more I have to learn and why I focus on gratitude.

While listening to some old music today I realized something pretty wild. Many of the songs I’d felt like I’d identified with in the past just didn’t quite ring as true today as they did back in the day. It was rather strange, all these lyrics I used to feel hit very close to home now felt almost uncomfortable.

When I stopped to think about it I realized something. The growth and focus on gratitude and presence has helped my attitude and joyfulness more significantly than I’d realized. In the past the songs were about dreams that hadn’t quite come true, things I wanted instead of wanting what I had, living in the past and the future. The lyrics got me thinking about how that situation could be turned into a positive, how the singer should focus on the present instead of looking ahead, and so on. It was crazy! That’s when I realized how much progress I’ve made. There’s still so far to go, so much to work on, but seeing a measuring stick moment like that is something I am very thankful for today.

Thanks!!!

What a beautiful sunny day it was! With a few of our nephews in town it was the perfect weather for heading out on the pontoon. So much sun, many laughs, tons of outdoor time. Perfect! While it seems like the weather has worked out a lot for us this year today was another one to be thankful for.

While out on the water I read while the boys played. I finished reading Essentialism for the umpteenth time. Of all the times I’ve read it I don’t know that I’ve taken my time to read it this in depth. It seems like I’ve gotten so much more out of it this time than in the past. I’ve read a lot of other books since the last time I went through it. Since the last time I’ve read it a lot has changed both personally and globally. Reading this time through a lens polished with new thoughts was quite enlightening.

I’m finding some very common themes across the books I’ve been reading lately. One of the core concepts in almost all of them is stripping away the extemporaneous in favor of living simply. This has really struck a chord as I’m finding just how difficult it can be to live simply. I don’t just mean get rid of worldly possessions and whatnot, but all of the extra “stuff” going on in our lives at any given time. The projects or meetings at work that don’t truly move the dial. The attention focused on non-productive things like surfing the web and social media. Everywhere I turn there’s something else vying for my attention, time, energy, and resources. Which leads to the next common theme…

Actively choosing how to live. Each moment of each day we may not control the circumstances around us, but we all have something that can never be taken from us… Choosing how we live. Our attitudes, thought processes, and perspectives are up to us to choose. Similarly, it is up to us to choose where and how we spend our attention, time, energy, and resources. By not actively choosing we are allowing someone else to choose for us. This book and the others before it remind me that it is up to me to actively choose how to live my life.

Another thought that permeates is remembering that I am finite and I will not live forever. I had a wonderful conversation with a friend about this topic recently. In the past I’ve written about my occasional trips to a cemetery to remind me that I will die. This isn’t a cold or dark thought, rather it’s one that leads to great joy. When remembering that there is an end I am reminded to live in the present and enjoy the life I have. If I don’t take time to remember that it is so easy to waste so much time. In this reading of the book there were so many reminders that I need to stay present in the moment and focus on what is truly important to me in life. To suck all the marrow form the bones of this life.

Whew! I wasn’t planning on going quite this deep tonight, funny how sometimes my daily blogging works as a release valve for my brain.

Here’s the cliff notes version. I’m thankful for the beautiful weather we had today as it helped make some wonderful memories on the water. I’m thankful for re-reading Essentialism slowly and deliberately as I got even more out of it than in past readings. I’m also grateful for all of the books, articles, podcasts, and life I’ve lived in the past year or so that continues to help shape me. The gap between who I am and who I should be is still more expansive than I’d like, but each day I continue to focus, think, and live in the present I can close the gap inch by inch. Slow but consistent progress.

Thanks!!!

How in the world has yet another year flown by so quickly? It feels like it was just last week that I was blogging about Gavin’s birthday. Here we are again already, another birthday in the books for Gavin. At 12 years old I’m floored when I consider that he’s 2/3’s of the way through his time at home already. In just a handful of year’s he’ll be heading off to college about this time.

I’m thankful for Gavin every single day – though some more than others 😉 He’s non-stop, upbeat, positive, kind, energetic, happy, smiling, joyful, playful, respectful, and has a huge heart. Over the past year his maturity and personality have continued to blossom and I’m so thankful for him.

In following along with my tradition I went through all of the photos of him from the past year and found a handful that remind me of different reasons I am thankful for Gavin.

Happy birthday dude!!! Love you Bud!!!

Thanks!!!

The past few days of work have been very much a blur for a variety of reasons. Some of the busy-ness was pre-planned and proactive. Some of it came relatively out of the blue. Regardless of the source or reasoning much of my time has been spent on calls, video conferences, and composing emails. My brain has been on overdrive the first three and a half days of the week. Heck, even at yoga last night I struggled to get my inner voice to stop monologue-ing.

Over the past couple of weeks I’ve had an idea hatching that could have a huge impact. With all of the other “stuff” going on I haven’t made time to focus on putting it together. The way this week was going it looked like it was going to be more of the same. Until I had an idea…One of the books I’ve been reading recently mentioned how the author went into “monk mode” to stay focused on his writing. As I stared at my task list after lunch I realized that the single most important thing I could be working on in that moment was to start my project. I shut down my email. I turned my phone on silent mode. I gave myself two hours to focus on that one project and put myself into “monk mode.”The results were amazing! Before I knew it the two hours were up and I had made more progress than expected. There’s still a long way to go on it, but putting 100% laser like focus onto it helped me kick start it.

I’ll definitely use this strategy again!

Thanks!!!

When I opened up the fridge to grab my lunch this afternoon I saw this…

You might be wondering how this is something I could be thankful for. Kind of strange, right? An apple on a Tupperware container full of food? Yes, I am totally thankful for this.

Fun fact about me: If I can’t see something it doesn’t exist. My mind is very visually oriented and I have some weird minor issue with objet permanence. Want to hide something from me? Put it in a cabinet and close the door. Poof! You made it disappear! I won’t even remember it existed until I open the cabinet to retrieve something else.

This weird trait extends to food in the refrigerator. If it’s not near the top or close to the door I just don’t see it. This morning I was giddy when I “discovered” a stash of sparkling water in the back of the fridge, pushed in about 18 inches from the front.

Becky realized I’ve been forgetting to eat my apples. She verbally reminds me, I thank her, I think about eating them, and then… what were we talking about? 😉 Today she remembered how my brain worked and pulled off a trick that had me smiling for many reasons. By setting the apple on top of my lunch I couldn’t help but remember to eat my apple! How awesome is that???

Thanks for helping me out using a strategy perfectly tailored for me!

Thanks!!!

Like I wrote about last night, Dominic and I hit the gym yesterday. That was the first time in quite a while that I have lifted weights. Sure, I’ve done yoga, but that’s not nearly the same… even though I was lifting very light weights last night.

This morning when I got out of bed I felt like someone had been beating my upper body with a baseball bat. Whenever I moved I found a new source of discomfort. My muscles were all sore, some more than others. Even as I blog tonight my chest and back are still feeling rather tender.

It’s kind of crazy, but it’s kind of a good type of sore. I know I pushed myself and the soreness leads to strength. The discomfort is a sign of growth.

Here’s the twist though… I know that if I were to get back into the lifting shape I’ve been in before and then maintain it I’d still be a little tender, but it’d be barely noticeable. Once I am in shape it is so much easier to maintain versus building up. This morning was a huge reminder to me that I need to find a sustainable long term balance as I build back up.

What got me thinking tonight is that it is very similar to my daily ritual of blogging. Over the past couple of weeks I’ve gotten some seemingly random compliments on my positivity and optimism. Sure, part of me is a naturally happy person, but it takes discipline, rigor, and practice for me to sustain a healthy level of positivity. By writing each and every single day it is my daily mental / optimism / gratitude workout. Writing like this pushes me to work parts of my brain that would quickly atrophy if they weren’t worked on a regular basis. Part of why I started doing this almost five years ago was because I hadn’t worked out like this in a long time and there were many of those first posts that were brutal!!! They still aren’t easy by any stretch, but they are easier due to repetition and discipline to practice.

As I sit here with sore muscles I’m thankful for the reminder to stay in shape. While it is my physical self that is sore today I know the same could be true of my mental self if I wee to start skipping workouts.

Thanks!!!

Tonight was a bit different than the past weeknights. Monday nights in particular have been focused on yoga in the park with Becky followed by supper, a walk, and then blogging. About the only part of that which remained tonight is happening right now – the blogging.

Thanks to the efforts of Gavin’s soccer club to find ways to keep the players and coaches socially distanced during practices Gavin had his first night of soccer in well over 8 months. Talk about a quick switch back to the old normal!

Becky hit yoga solo. Dominic and I dropped off Gavin at practice and then headed to the YMCA. We worked out in masks in a very spaced out and quiet fitness area and then headed back to pick up Gavin. Becky had the pizzas in the oven and just about ready by the time we walked in the door. The boys and I devoured the ‘za and here we are. After this I’ll be reading in bed for a little bit, go to sleep, wake up early and do it all over again tomorrow. Back to the old normal!

It’s kind of crazy. Back in February I found this exhausting. Today I found it wildly refreshing! When normal is no longer normal it truly feels better to get back to normal. What’s changed? Really nothing but my perspective. Again, another reminder of the power of choosing my mindset. I can either find it tiring or refreshing, it’s up to me to put the context to it.

Deep thoughts aside, whew, normal-ish felt pretty damn good!

Thanks!!!

One of the tricks I’ve picked up from the book Digital Minimalism was keeping a book nearby at all times. Truthfully, this wasn’t the first time I’d read that advice. A year or so ago when I read On Writing Stephen King offered that advice up to anyone interested in writing. The funny thing was that I realized it was a great idea then, but I did nothing with it other than feel occasional guilt when surfing on my device. After Digital Minimalism I saw it as way for me to break my habit of staring at my phone during down time.

This weekend while camping I had Essentialism in my shorts pocket most of the time. When there was a lull I was able to bust it out and read a few chapters. Over the past couple of weeks I’ve had it nearby often and there’ve been many times I’ve found space to read an extra chapter or two. This weekend I was able to remind myself of some great strategies for staying focused including how to say “no” more confidently and a process to help focus only on the right opportunities.

This afternoon when I went to pick up the boys from Scouts I knew I was likely going to spend some time waiting in the car. Thinking ahead I grabbed a different book, Man’s Search for Meaning, and started reading after I pulled up. I’m so thankful I did as there were several very interesting insights and points to ponder. Specifically, I was surprised by the mindset of individuals who’d been freed from the concentration camp and how they responded afterwards. In addition to helping me realize I need to continue to focus on finding ongoing meaning it helped me see that we will continue to have serious struggles as a society even after COVID has been mitigated. The shift back to normal is never easy and there are going to be varied emotions as we all attempt to get back to “normal.” It’s already got my mind rolling at a fevered pace thinking ahead to how I can help both myself and others through what is sure to be trying times ahead. Spoiler alert, we all must focus on finding meaning in our suffering – how can we find ways to become stronger because of this rather than just suffering through this.

Long story short, here’s what I’m most thankful for today. A minor behavioral change has helped me find more insight today. While the gap between who I am and who I feel I am called to be is still large I was able to make progress on closing the gap. Had I continued to behave the way I used to only a month ago I most likely would have missed this opportunity until I had specific downtime to read in detail. Through one minor change I’m able to grow in a positive way; and all without missing the activity that would have consumed that time in the past.

Thanks!!!

If you’ve read my blog over the past few weeks you’ll most likely note I’ve been focused on some deeper thoughts and gratitudes. Today? I’m going in a very different direction. Sometimes there is something that is just so good and I appreciate so much that I’ll just focus there instead of going deep.

While camping today Matt started prepping ribs for dinner at approximately 10am. Over the next 7+ hours he continued to take care of the ribs in his smoker. Every so often he’d pause everything to focus on the ribs, slathering a delicious coating of butter and vinegar on them to help them roast to perfection. By the time they were complete they were pretty much falling off the bone.

There was a ton to be thankful for today. Many awesome moments, great memories made, and some interesting insights. All that said, eating the best ribs I’ve ever had in my entire life totally took the cake today! Each juicy, savory, delicious bite was mind glowingly amazing! Between the couple dozen of us we easily took down all 9 full racks.

Matt – thanks for working your art for all of us today, we appreciate it greatly, though our waistbands may be a little more strained 😉

Thanks!!!