Yes, I know, I know.  I’ve blogged about Meditations by Marcus Aurelius more than a few times over the past handful of years.  Here’s the thing: of all of the books I’ve read in my life it is easily on my personal Mount Rushmore of influential books (most likely accompanied by The Book of Joy, New Seeds of Contemplation, the Bible, Essentialism, and The Obstacle Is the Way – yes, that’s more than four, but I’d also modify the true Mount Rushmore slightly if I had the chance).

There’s been something rolling through my head often this week… I’ve been focused on answering a very specific question that is one that seems incredibly simplistic.  Aren’t those some of the most frustrating yet energizing questions?  One that seems way to simple when you first read it that your brain kind of glosses over it, gives the easy surface answer, and then starts to move on… and then you have that, “HOLD ON, WAIT A SECOND!!!” thought that causes you to stop in your tracks.  You pause, re-read the question, and quickly realize there will be no quick answer to it.  Next thing you know your brain is going a thousand miles an hour trying to figure out the insanely complex question you almost blew right past without a thought.  That’s what I’ve been having go through my head.  I’m really hoping you understand, if not I just might have shown a first stage of insanity 😉

After our run this morning I could almost answer the question but it wouldn’t quite roll off my tongue.  I paused for a second, looked at my book shelf of my most influential books (yes, they have a special shelf in my bedroom) and BAM!!!  I had it!  In a few feverish moments I cruised through a couple of books just to make sure I had it right and there it was… another awesome piece of wisdom from Meditations that almost answered the question.

Objective judgement, now, at this very moment.

Unselfish action, now, at this very moment.

Willing acceptance – now, at this very moment – of all external events.

That’s all you need.

The interesting thing about Meditations was that this wasn’t something Marcus necessarily wrote for anyone else.  It was his personal notes to himself, the lessons he’d learned about how he felt life should be lived.  The writings were meant to be a guide for him to study as he added new thoughts and observations while living his life.

Some of what hit home so deeply in this were not only the points themselves, but also the focus on now, the present.  That is definitely one of the keys to my answer.  Staying in the now, being present, focusing on what’s at hand.

I would love to be able to go back to talk with him as he wrote this.  There’s a piece that I’m not quite seeing but I feel he would say it is woven in it.  How amazing it would be to sit and ask him his thoughts.  Seeing as I can’t I’ll have to do the next best thing… guess.  Either way, I am thinking that the only thing that is not clearly (or at least cleanly) threaded into his answer is gratitude.

Marcus, thank you so much for taking the time to write your thoughts so that others may learn from them.  Today your words of advice helped me answer a question I was struggling with.

Thanks!!!

In his awe inspiring commencement speech for Standford Steve Jobs said:

Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

I’ve loved this comment ever since I heard it the first time. What I’m learning as days go by is just how true the comment is and how much I am thankful for it.

Earlier in the day I had a beautifully honest conversation about my past recession experiences and how they relate today. As I shared past experiences – both mistakes made and lessons learned – I couldn’t help but notice just how much of an impact that rough time had on me.

That was by far and away one of the most difficult professional times in my life. Throughout that time I stressed about so many things, both within and outside of my control. There were times in which I had gotten so stressed and worked up about all of the what if’s that I couldn’t sleep and it was taking a physical toll on me. Quite often I would get frustrated discouraged and struggled to stay positive.

Today in our conversation I started to realize how much I learned through those times. While it was incredibly difficult to live through I learned so much about business, sales, stress management, and so many life lessons. While in those times all I could do was persevere and keep faith that it would all work out in the long run. It turns out that it did.

In going through our current challenges I’d almost taken for granted all that I’d learned through the last recession. Many of the reasons I’ve done what I’ve done and stayed as calm as I have through most of this has been drawn from that experience. Without that experience I can’t imagine just how difficult it would be. Now that I have the benefit of hindsight I can see how those trials back in the day have helped to prepare me for now. I can see how some of the dots now connect by looking backwards.

As I get frustrated, nervous, and unsure throughout this current challenge I am going to remember that this experience will help me become stronger and better for the next challenge I face. I may not be able to see how it’s helping me now but at some point I will be able to look backwards to connect the dots. I have faith that everything will work out and I must remain positive.

Thanks!!!

Almost a year ago I wrote a blog post titled “Thankful for Paying Attention to the Nudges the Universe Provides.”  Tonight’s post is very similar, but just a tad different.  Today I’m thankful for the nudges themselves.  Just a warning – as I’m writing this I’m not quite sure it’s making sense quite the way I intended…  if someone wants to jump in and take a stab at it to help me out that would be greatly appreciated!!!

What do I mean by nudges?  You ever have that feeling that you’re about to head in a potentially wrong direction and something happens to help get you on track?  Maybe there’s something you’re doing right and about to change but you get that gut feel to maybe stay the course instead?  To me those moments are when The Big Dude Upstairs is helping to nudge us in the right direction.  Nothing crazy, not like a light bulb going off or a miracle from above, rather just a subtle nudge.

Over the course of the past couple of weeks I’ve felt a few of those nudges.  Some to get me back on track, some to keep me on track.  Nothing crazy or drastic, but just that little shift that could make all the difference if I heed it.

That’s also one of the reasons I am thankful for nudges.  The Big Dude could just push us, force us, or make the call for us.  A nudge is very different.  It’s something we can feel and that gets us thinking, but it’s up to us to take action on or to read correctly.  In some ways it’s kind of like the rumble strips on the highway; it’s an extra warning system to keep you on track.  With it being this close to Easter I can’t help but wonder if it has something to do with the human experiences The Big Dude had while alive.  Just my own personal hunch, definitely will be worth a conversation with Him someday over a cup of coffee in the great beyond.

The fact that a nudge is given and we’re allowed to make our own choice of how to respond is an incredible thing.  It reminds me that the situation is one in which I still have the ability to decide how to move forward.  I’m also reminded that The Big Dude is helping to watch out for me and doing Their best to help lead me to the right place.  It also shows me that I am loved enough to allow me to make a mistake if necessary to help me grow.  If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.

Thank you so much for all of the nudges recently!  I am taking them all in, doing my best to point myself in the right direction, and hope to do what’s needed to be the best me I can be.  Thank you for taking time to help me stay the course and reminding me that I always have a choice.  Thank you for being patient with me, I can be a slow learner sometimes.  Thank you for nudging me at times to remind me I might already be on the right track and need to stay on course.  Big Dude, thank you for loving me enough to nudge me.

Thanks!!!

 

During a walk this afternoon Becky and I somehow brought up Aerosmith.  There were a couple of their songs that played in my head while we walked but I didn’t think too much of it.  Later in the afternoon I went up to my workshop and decided to turn on some music.  Aerosmith was still top of mind so I fired up their greatest hits album – Big Ones.

As I sanded my latest project I caught myself singing along with some classic Aerosmith tunes.  I chuckled when I realized that my sanding was to the beat of the songs I was listening to.  After a while I was totally drifting off while sanding (one of the reasons I kind of enjoy the basic task).

My mind was back in 1994.  On a Friday morning my buddy Garwood and I headed out of Phillips.  We took his white Ford Festiva on road trip to go see his brother in La Crosse.    so much great music was played in the car on the way there.  I still remember us singing along to so many songs.  It was awesome!

The visit was a short one, we immediately left La Crosse and headed off with one of his brother’s friends to Milwaukee to watch Aerosmith.  Quick side note, one of my all time favorite road trip memories happened on the ride from La Crosse to Milwaukee.  I was pretty exhausted and have a tendency of falling asleep while riding in a car.  I must have drifted off because I remember waking up to Garwood’s brother, Mike, screaming at the top of his lungs, “OH MY GOD WE’RE GOING TO DIE!!!”  That certainly caught my attention and my head jerked up and was on a swivel trying to figure out how horrible our deaths were going to be.  That’s about when the laughter enveloped the car.  It was AWESOME!!!  I’ll never forget that!

The concert was amazing and my first huge concert.  What an experience!  Jackal opened for Aerosmith and played The Lumberjack; the song involving a chainsaw.  From there Aerosmith provided an incredible experience.  Song after song of hits.  The energy that Steven Tyler and the rest of the band put off was wild.  Almost everyone song was sung by the entire crowd.  Of the entire night I think that Dream On was the song that stands out.  The entire event (and the road trip home) were surreal.

We headed back up north on Saturday morning and enjoyed another few hours of listening to great music, shooting the bull, and talking about some of the more important things in life like D&D.  How awesome to have so much time hanging out one on one with one of your best friends?  Just thinking about that road trip and the others like them leave me smiling ear to ear.

It’s funny, that’s another piece of the concert experience that I think I don’t take time to appreciate nearly as much as it deserves.  The prep, drive, road trip, pre-game, and after party of the concert are just as important as the concert itself in many ways.  I’ve got many great concert memories, but there seem to be even more awesome memories from the road trip to the show and the ride home.

Garwood – can you believe that was over 25 years ago???  Holy crap!!!  Dude, thank you again for the invite to the show.  What an awesome experience that I’ll always be thankful for.  Great times road tripping with best friends, it doesn’t get much better than that.

Thanks!!!

This morning we took our family hike out at the Trempealeau National Wildlife Refuge.  Talk about some near perfect weather for being outside as a family!  While hiking we saw so much wildlife including ducks, woodpeckers, frogs, snakes, turtles, a caterpillar, and a muskrat.  Being outside in the sun, outside of the house, and wandering around an area we haven’t gone to often was great.  Even better was the time spent as a family enjoying all of this together.  Throw in some exercise through the 15-ish mile hike and it was a wonderful start to the week.  Looking forward to the 20 miler next week!

One of the insights I picked up from the Safer At Home situation was very much unexpected today.  For some reason I was thinking of making meatballs for supper.  As luck would have it we had plenty of ground turkey, but no eggs, no tomato sauce and no spaghetti noodles.  Throw in no mozzarella and most of the natural go to’s I would have done with meatballs were out.  Sure, I could run to the store, but we’re doing our best to only go once every one to two weeks.  This left me with a an interesting decision that led to the insight.  I could run to the store and grab what we needed for the traditional meatball stuff, I could switch gears and make something completely different, or I could still have my meatballs but create something completely different.

As soon as I chose to create something different I was working with limited resources.  I had to cruise through the kitchen to see what we had and figure out a way to make a complete meal using only what we had.  Practicing creativity like this was a blast!

Before I knew it I had cooked up two type of meatballs.  One was Mexican themed with black bean quinoa and the other used a box of Stove Top.  The Mexican meatballs got dunked in taco sauce.  The stuffing meatballs were cut in half and added to a pizza.  Not just any pizza – like I said, we didn’t have pizza sauce or mozzarella.  This was a ranch, meatball, red & banana pepper pizza with rinsed cottage cheese.  Yup, talk about something totally ridiculous, but it ended up tasting great!  Sure, I could have picked up just anything from the store to complete it the normal way, but having to improvise and utilize creativity was awesome.

It really got me thinking…  One of the things that has happened a lot recently is that there are resources that are now much more limited to “the ‘Rona.”  How can I find ways to turn those limited resources into a creativity based game?  Sure it’s always nice to have unlimited resources, but there’s such a challenge to working with you hands cuffed a little.

Thanks!!!

Early this morning Becky and I went out for our normal run.  I’m not sure if I was still half asleep, just not paying attention or what, but all of a sudden a giant crack ripped open in the earth and sent the blacktop ahead of me heaving up in the air by well over 12 inches!!!  Or…  I somehow managed to not pick my foot up all the way and caught it in a pothole…  I guess we’ll never know for sure (though I am kind of doubting the spontaneous freak geological event).

Regardless of the reason I found myself hurtling through the air with my torso further ahead of my legs than they could ever hope to catch and re-balance.  In a flash I realized I was going to fall and I accepted my fate.  By the way – isn’t it crazy how time slows down in moments like that?  Pretty sure there’s another blog there for a different day 😉

In a flash my thinking brain defaulted to my limbic brain.  Without any thought I brought my arms up around my head as I tucked my chin to my chest.  Instead of trying to catch myself I rolled into the motion so my body rolled as I hit the ground.  My weight was spread out over almost maximum surface as to not cause serious injury.  Once my body came to a halt I paused and did a quick systems check.  No issues, no pain (other than pride), and no issues.  I sprang back up to my feet and was off and moving again right away.  All of this in a flash, and all of it requiring almost zero focused thought.

As a lifelong uncoordinated clutz I’ve had more than my share of spills and falls.  I’ve tripped over painted lines, fallen without moving, and missed putting my foot where it was intended.  Honest to God, one time I fell into our basement window well after tripping on the landscaping.  Falling is something I’ve done quite a lot.  You know what else I’ve done just as often?  I’ve gotten back up.

When I fell today the lessons of past falls kicked right into gear and helped me get back on track.  As we took off running afterwards I couldn’t help but see the similarities to recent life.  Throughout life there’ve been many falls.  This is another one to add to the list of experiences.  As I have from all the others I am confident that I’ll rise from it (and if I don’t I guess it means I’m not around to worry about not getting back up!).  I started thinking about the reflexes I went through in my fall and realized I have already done some of these same steps in this fall as well as others in the past.

1. Tuck my head and protect the most vital parts.  If the most important parts of me are broken I can’t get back up.  Protect the core, even if it means sacrificing a limb.
2. Roll with fall.  If I would’ve tried to stop the fall I would’ve landed right on my face and the impact would have been sudden and abrupt.  By rolling with it I was able to keep my momentum.  In an extreme version of this I had one of the greatest trail running experiences of my life.  I was wrapping up the last quarter mile of a long marathon training run and decided to run at almost a sprint to finish it out.  A tree root obviously decided to humble me and took me out while I was at full speed.  I tucked and rolled and somehow, I swear, I rolled all the way through, ended up back on my feet, and was right back in stride.  God as my witness, it really happened.  I took advantage of my momentum and the fall and used it to my advantage instead of fighting it and was successful.
3. Do a quick systems check.  It is so important to quickly pause and make sure you’re okay after a fall.  Check what got hurt and seek medical attention if needed.  Know how you’ve been impacted from this.
4. Get back up right away.  Period.  Even if hurt getting back up moves you forward.  Always get back up immediately, don’t overthink it, just get back up.

This morning while running I was so thankful that the tuck, roll, check, and rise routine had been pounded into my brain.  Whoever would’ve thought that each of those falls were lessons for me to grow from?  In my life I am thankful for each of the falls I’ve risen from in the past, they’ve taught me how to roll through and rise from this one.

Thanks!!!

Good evening everyone!  Yes, I’m totally going in a slightly different direction than normal today…  kind of.  The first thing I’m thankful for is something that hasn’t happened yet.  Crazy right?  Not really!  Tonight’s blog is both gratitude and an ask for your help.  First I’ll set the stage and then I’ll ask for your help.

I still remember way back in the day when I was trying to decide what I wanted to do for a career.  Through a high school internship I had the opportunity to learn form an engineer.  In college I remember learning from several of my managers on how to run a business and what a career in sales and management looked like.  I still remember meeting with someone who was a sales rep in the paint industry and learning more about sales.  That contact was one thanks to a relationship Dad had with the rep and I’ll never forget that conversation, advice and help.  I remember many conversations with business owners early in my Express career that helped me see the in’s and out’s of owning a business.

Long story short, there are so many people who’ve had a very positive impact in my career and career choices.  I am thankful for each and every single one of them.  Without their coaching, conversations, influence and time I would not be in the career I am in.  I am so grateful for the time and advice they gave me without ever asking anything in return.

And that’s where all of you come in today 😉 

I could use your help in helping someone who has helped my family.  Gavin’s basketball coach is a college student and is going to school for a double major of Finance and Accounting.  He’s got a few more years until he graduates and is looking for an opportunity to reality test his career path.  He is mature beyond his years and he’s one of those people you can tell has the Grit, Growth Mindset, and Gratitude to do something very special in his career.  The leadership he showed and his ability to rise to the challenge when facing adversity were on full display as he coached. I am grateful for the coaching experience he provided for my son.

Would you or someone you know who has or had a career in finance or financial planning have an interest in talking with him about the Finance and Accounting career path?  He’s not necessarily looking for a job (though he is most likely available this summer); more of someone to talk with or possibly someone he could shadow once social distancing is lifted.

As you can imagine, I wouldn’t be reaching out to everyone if this wasn’t someone I believed in whole heartedly.  Personally, I’m still hoping to persuade him to consider a career in business ownership via Express.  If that was his interest I’d hire him in a heartbeat!  I can’t wait to see the great things he does in his career.

If you’d like to talk with him please let me know and I’ll be happy to introduce the two of you via email, phone, video conference, or LinkedIn.

Thanks in advance for any help you can provide him!

Thanks!!!

When I think of the phrase I’ve used a lot recently there’s a piece that I maybe didn’t quite realize was crucial to the success of that specific phrase.  Over the past few months I’ve been very much focused on “controlling what I can control.”  I’m a long ways from perfect at it, but in spending as much time focusing on it as I have there’s been a significant difference in how I’ve been viewing the world and the corresponding increase in my joy.

Over the past few years there’ve been many lessons, both personal and professional, that have led me down the path of controlling what I can control.  I’ve used the term “letting go of the whee” in a very similar fashion.  There’ve been several times when I’ve reminded myself that an even itself is neither good nor bad, it just is.  It is I who add the context of “good” or “bad” to the situation.  The event itself is out of my control, but the decision of how I respond is 100% my choice.  When I remember to pause and think about what’s actually under my control and how I should choose to act there’s an underlying foundation that I haven’t really focused on as much as I should have.

What is at the heart of all of these thoughts?  Simple…  acceptance.  In my head and heart I would love to wish away the situation and have a different one.  I would love to find a way to negotiate a different challenge than the one I face.  I can bury my head in the sand and refuse to see what is truly in front of me.  There’s always the option to just disbelieve the reality around me and live in a delusional dream world.  In all of those cases I’m still controlling what I can control, but in such an unhealthy way.

In order to find the right path, to choose the right attitude and actions, I must first accept the situation in its entirety.  That’s not to say that I will just rollover and be run over by it, but there is a point in which I have to accept that this is, or may be, reality.  Once I truly accept it I can then control how I respond.  I can only choose the right attitude after I’ve accepted what’s happening.

This is a tough one for me.  I’m overly optimistic much of the time which can lead me to think that something isn’t as dire as it may truly be.  My ego is strong and I feel confident in my ability to use negotiation to shift a situation in my favor.  Accepting something at face value isn’t something that comes naturally to me.  In a weird circular logic kind of way I have to remember that I control whether I choose to accept the situation first and then determine my response to the situation.

If I accept the situation I can move forward. I can find a way out.  I can find the bright side.  I have hope to use it as a point of leverage to become stronger.  I can bear the short term suffering as I know I will be better for it in the long run.  Once I accept it I know I can find a way to leverage it into becoming more of the person I am called to be.

If I don’t accept the situation I get frustrated.  There’s a dissonance in my brain because my reality and the reality don’t line up.  If I don’t accept the true challenge I will not be successful, I might miss the gravity of the situation, and I will end up frustrated and depressed.  I’ll never get over the hump until I accept that the hump is there.

With all that is going on I’m so thankful for realizing the power and beauty of acceptance.  Turning adversity into strength hinges upon acceptance.  If I accept the gravity of the current challenge I know I can be successful in finding a way to navigate these stormy seas.  If I don’t accept them I’ll disbelieve the tidal wave right up until the point that it crushes me.  I can only control what I can control in the right way once I’ve accepted reality.

Thanks!!!

There’s only one right way to start my blog tonight…

Some things in life are bad. They can really make you mad.

Other things just make you swear and curse.

When you’re chewin’ on life’s gristle, don’t grumble, give a whistle.

And this’ll help things turn out for the best… and…

Always look on the bright side of life.

Always look on the light side of life. – Eric Idle

If you suddenly have an itch you have to scratch you can scratch away here: https://youtu.be/SJUhlRoBL8M

Right after listening to that classic we shot chasers of Don’t Worry, Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin and Three Little Birds by Bob Marley. Talk about three songs that could make you smile anytime. Even as much as I dislike Don’t Worry, Be Happy I cant help but smile and sing along whenever it comes on.

As an added bonus there was also a bonus video that popped up on my YouTube app. Eric Idle on the Late Late Show from about a year ago. It was awesome! It started as very quaint lead-in for Bright Side of Life but then it took a much darker, and more hysterical, turn. Next thing you know they are singing a song that sounds the same musically but has completely different lyrics… We Are Probably All Going to Die. I know, it sounds morbid, but it cracked me up! https://youtu.be/tAPceUSVLKM

This evening I am so thankful for those great songs and funny video. While there is so much wonderful in the world to put a smile on my face the songs and video made it even a little easier to crack a grin. Being able to share them with my family, smiles included, made it all the better.

If you’re night isn’t going as planned or something is just off tonight please remember those great words of advice from the aforementioned Mr. Idle…

If life seems jolly rotten, There’s something you’ve forgotten

And that’s to laugh and smile and dance and sing

When you’re feeling in the dumps, Don’t be silly chumps

Just purse your lips and whistle, that’s the thing..

And…

Always look on the bright side of life

Always look on the bright side of life

Thanks!!!

This morning I got to make an hour long drive time take care of some business. Talk about the perfect morning to do it; the sun was out and there was a fresh coat of snow on the bluffs. The route to my destination led me through some small county roads up and through the coulees. A couple of times I checked for traffic behind me, stopped, and took a few pics of the beautiful snow covered paradise all around me. There’s a magic to the rolling valleys in the Driftless when they have a light coat of snow on their trees.

Times like this make me chuckle. I know my words don’t even begin to do the natural beauty justice but I still try. I’ve already written and rewritten the paragraph above several times to attempt to better reflect the vistas, but I know it’s in vain. Just as is taking pictures of it; they just aren’t the same as experiencing it firsthand.

One of the blogs I follow often talks of “alive” time versus “dead” time. Alive time is when we are productive and truly living life. Dead time is the opposite when we’re doing something that truly doesn’t matter and contributes nothing. To help show that point from a very different angle today the author used a scene from Fight Club to show the difference between the two – how crazy is that? Even more crazy was just how well it really proved the point. Is life truly worth living if you only choose dead time? Knowing that we all only have a limited amount of time why would we all not want to maximize our alive time? This will be in my thoughts often over the next few days.

Thanks!!!