One of my favorite parts of my career path is the opportunity to tour many local manufacturers. In order to help place people in the right career opportunities we tour the facility to see exactly what and how the candidates will do their job. This gives us a chance to make sure everything is safe and also to be able to better describe it to a job seeker.
While it is intended to serve a business purpose it also scratches my curiosity itch. Seeing how things are manufactured blows my mind. Sure, there are TV shows like How It’s Made, but to actually see it in person is awesome!
Over the past couple of decades I’ve seen things from gummy bears to baseball bats to canoes to military surveillance devices to hard drives to train axle lubricators to the orange flexible posts that hold up highway signs to music books to violin bows to air tight cello cases. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg! I’d bet I’ve toured over 200 different manufacturers in my career with Express and each has produced something very different.
Today I had to opportunity to tour two different manufacturers with some of our teammates and I was smiling from ear to ear. In some cases I have try to tone down the excitement a little as I’m so amped up! Crazy right?
From one of our tours today – my apologies, but I had to keep the picture pretty basic 😉
Each time I tour a business my inner child gets crazy giddy at the prospect of seeing how something new is made. What processes are used? What materials are used? Why this instead of that? How do you manage supply line and forecast upcoming demand? Why is the operation laid out like it is? So many questions I want to ask to learn more about how they produce their products.
Thank you to all of the businesses who’ve blessed me with the opportunity to satisfy my child like senses of curiosity and wonder – I appreciate those moments greatly!
It seems like there always several pockets of gap time in each week. You know, those moments in the day when you’re going from one thing to the next and things don’t quite line up resulting in an extra gap of time. For me it’s often that time in-between dropping off Gavin at soccer and picking him up. By the time we drop him off it’s kind of on the fence whether or not it’s productive to head home. That’s the gap time I’m talking about.
I’ve tried a few handfuls of ways to plug the gap, and some have been more successful than others.
Unfortunately my default, even with training myself on it, has been to go to my phone. It’s right there, always ready, and always seems to find a way to grab my attention for more time than I would like it to. When I just react to the gap and am not prepared for it my phone is still the default script I’m working on re-coding.
One that has worked very well situationally is bringing book everywhere with me. Finding the right types of books to quickly open up and take in small doses is key… as is finding one with a small profile. Hauling a novel around is difficult, Meditations by Marcus Aurelius or The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday are about as big as I want. Spending time lost in a book and then letting the ideas and thoughts sink in is about perfect. Thank you Mr. Stephen King for helping me with that one.
If the location is right I’m easily lost in chilling and enjoying the view. This works so well when I’m sitting by a lake or river or forest or anything peaceful like that. Taking that gap time to remember why I so love living in this area is another great use of those bonus minutes.
Dominic and I have found it to be just enough time to sneak in a workout which has been pretty awesome. Not only does it provide extra exercise time, it is an opportunity for the two of just to bond and reconnect during the day.
Becky had a great idea for the gap time tonight. Instead of chilling we went for an awesome walk near the soccer fields while Gavin practiced. Spending time with just the two of us while being active and taking in the crazy copper colored sun was so relaxing and rewarding all at the same time.
I’m so thankful for finding ways to turn gap time into bonus time. Either way I look at it the time is going to be spent, I may as well look at it as a bonus and be thankful for it. This moments are often when some of my best thinking happens. In some ways I almost need to find more ways to cause a little gap time to happen on purpose to give myself a little more space… hmm…
Dominic and I had a good chunk of time with just the two of us tonight. I’m so grateful for the times when he’s in a talkative mood like he was tonight, I’ll soak those moments up as much as possible.
During our conversation tonight we covered a ton of topics, some weighty but most fun. One of the parts I enjoyed the most was listening to Dominic think out loud about the places in the world he’d most like to go back to visit and why. He even mentioned possible interest in living in some of them. The reason I’m grateful for that part of the conversation specifically is threefold.
First off, I’m glad we’ve traveled with the boys to help them see how big the world is and how much there is to explore. Hearing him share the differences between stargazing in Hawaii and Utah (which he hasn’t been to yet) and comparing parts of Australia, New Zealand, and Alaska. Hearing him use his experience to see the grandeur of the planet makes me smile from ear to ear.
Second, when he speaks of it he expresses his heartfelt gratitude for the opportunities and blessings he’s had to have had these experiences. Dominic understands that these are possible of hard work, sacrifice, luck, and, most importantly, from dreaming big. Hearing him speak in almost reverent tones about those experiences makes him sound wise beyond his years.
Last, I’m so glad that he sees life as a gift to be enjoyed and appreciated and the entire world as limitless opportunities. When Dominic is thinking about living out his life he’s not confining himself to one city, state, country or even continent. He’s seeing that where he lives is his choice to make as opposed to a predestined location. I remember dreaming of moving out west and living in the mountains. While I didn’t (at least not yet) there was a magic in knowing that I was choosing where to live that helps to change my perspective to one of positivity. Knowing that he’s already on that train of thought is awesome. His life is his choice, not his obligation.
All of that talk with him coupled with our recent Scouting canoe trip got me more excited for the next mini-adventure. In the not too distant future I’m heading out on a kayak / camping trip for a couple of days. With the wind in my sails I spent more time than I expected tonight going over plans and packing. My goal is to go as minimal as possible (though not as minimal as the Dollar Store Challenge earlier this year). That said, I’m grateful for melding a handful of ideas and experiences together into a experience that is socially distant and yet fun.
Thinking of that specifically, my post from yesterday inspired me to keep looking for more pockets of normal and then I realized I may have been looking at this a little incorrectly. I should really be looking for pockets of awesome in the present, regardless of how it is shaped. In every moment of life there are limiting factors. Some are real, others are largely imagined. If I stay focused on my purpose and my dreams I can find a way to make magic in almost any moment, it is up to me to find it, make the most of the moment and to appreciate it. My big takeaway is that I need to stop comparing now to then as then has past and now is all that exists (though not at the expense of screwing up the potential future). Hmm… That hit home more than I thought. How much time have I wasted comparing now to a time that no longer exists? This will definitely stay top of mind for a while…
Ahh… not gonna lie, this view is amazing in so many ways.
Sitting on a lawn chair, outside in perfect weather, and watching Gavin do something he loves. Sure, I could focus instead on the chairs being 8-12’ away from the nearest parent and having to lower my mask and then putting it back on to take drinks of coffee, but what would that accomplish? I consider myself blessed to have the opportunity to spend time enjoying both the day and Gavin enjoying life. What a beautiful slice of heaven!
What’s funny is that there are these little pockets of normalcy to be found all around in life. They may take a little more work to find as my eyes aren’t necessarily trained to see them yet, but they are all around nonetheless. I find it easy to slide into a fixed mindset and see only obstacles, but if I pause for a second to look at the world through a growth mindset there are opportunities everywhere. Be it Zoom calls with friends, outdoor sports, spending time outside with family, and so on, there are pockets of normalcy all around, I just need to remember to actively seek them out.
Yesterday was the five year anniversary of the weekend we built the treehouse for the boys with Dad. This morning I had to run to Menards to pick up a saw blade for my table saw. The first option I had in hand was the all purpose inexpensive one. In an instant I remembered advice from Dad from back in the day. He’d told me to replace my saw blade more often than I thought I should, buy the right blade for the right job, and never buy the cheapest one (& almost never buy the most expensive either). I put the saw blade down and ended up buying three different ones for all the projects I have and invested in the high quality blades instead. While I didn’t want to spend that much I know my projects will be better and my stress level will be lower thanks to his advice.
What a day it’s been! The morning started off with a run, moved into canoeing, and ended with a Court of Honor. No wonder I’m exhausted right now!
I’m thankful for the run Becky and I got in this morning for a few reasons. First off, the weather wasn’t supposed to cooperate per the forecasts we’d seen last night so we thought there’d be no chance. As luck would have it the rain ended a little before our run and all we got was a light misting. Second, I really wanted to just go back to bed this morning. Days like this when I get my but in gear even when I don’t want to are the ones that feel incredibly rewarding (thanks Becky!). Last, nothing like a good dose of exercise to kick off the day!
The Scouts continue to impress me with finding ways to keep the kids safe and socially distant. Today’s endeavor included a canoeing / kayaking trip. We paddled along with them down the Black River and had a ton of fun for the entire 13+ mile ride. It’s been a while since I’ve been canoeing, I forgot the differences between paddling in a kayak versus a canoe and this was a welcome change of pace. Being in a canoe always brings back wonderful memories of trapping with Dad as we’d paddle from set to set. Being able to do this and see how much fun my boys were having with it was awesome. Even though I’ve lived here for a couple of decades I continue to find reasons why I’m so in love with this area. Paddling today was a great reminder of that.
After the canoeing and kayaking adventure was complete we wrapped up our evening with the Scouts at their Court of Honor. Throughout the pandemic they’ve held off on doing them as they’re best done in person. Tonight it was held outside at the fire bowl and everyone sat around with well over 6 feet from the next nearest person. As the Scouts would get called down to receive their awards their masks were on. Handshakes were replaced with elbow bumps. Outside of that everything else was normal… kind of.
They boys have been crazy productive on their merit badges since COVID started. Seeing as there hadn’t been a court of honor since before then they’ve gotten a stockpile of earned merit badges saved up. Tonight they each got 10+ merit badges – that’s crazy! Seeing them receive a huge stack of reward for their hard work made me so proud. I’m so thankful for how much they’ve worked on the merit badges throughout the past handful of months.
Now it’s time for this dude to crash. A morning run, a canoe trip, and a court of honor… I’m grateful for those three big things that highlighted by day and also for all the moments in between that rounded out the day.
First off, what a day we lived through 19 years ago. My heart goes out to everyone who was impacted by the horrific events of violence almost two decades ago. Quite honestly, that’s pretty much all of us, isn’t it? The impact to some was unimaginable, yet all of us who remember that day have been impacted in many other ways. One of the things I’m grateful for today are the crystal clear memories I still have from that day.
I was in the La Crosse Express office when the first jet hit. I still remember the conversation we had in those first few moments of not knowing what was going on. The topic of business we’d meant to discuss disappeared completely into the ether as the world paused. We asked how this could have happened, how did the pilot make an error like that, and what a tremendous loss of life in an accident. Quite honestly, the true loss of life hadn’t even begun to register in my brain.
While we tried to figure out what was happening the second jet hit. At that point we quickly started to see that something was going horribly awry. After some brief discussion I headed from the La Crosse office to the Winona office.
I’ll never forget the drive to Winona as it was possibly the most surreal of my life. At the time I was a huge fan of ESPN Radio and was listening to Tony Kornheiser. All idea of sports was gone, the only focus on what was happening all around us. The third jet had hit the Pentagon and Tony was broadcasting from Washington DC. He shared what he was hearing and seeing in a combination of first, second, and third hand accounts. At one point he was interrupted, was silent, and then apologized for going off the air as he’d been told to evacuate.
As soon as I got to Winona I remember frantically trying to open and refresh the CNN.com home page to get updates on what was happening. While this was going on I was also taking phone calls from our employees who weren’t sure if they were supposed to go into work that night. There’s one call in particular I’ll never forget as I did my best to calm him down from his panic and nervousness.
I don’t know that I watched as much news in my life as I did that day. Trying to keep up with what was actually happening felt impossible. Each story told brought up more and more emotion as the death tolls increased and the personal stories of victims were shared. As the stories of heroes from that day started to appear the emotions hit even harder.
That night Becky and I headed to the UW La Crosse campus and met with hundreds of others for a candlelight vigil and prayer service. On the way home we saw lines longer than any I’ve seen to this day for gas as none of us were quite sure what to expect next.
So why am I thankful for the crystal clear memories of that day filled with tragedy? In that day and next few afterwards the spirit of our country showed and we all healed as one, albeit for a brief moment. For one day it didn’t feel like there were differences in race, religion, economic class, or nationality. For a brief moment our society was full of love for each other, caring for each other, and comforting each other. We set down all of our petty arguments and worked together to heal. We were one country, founded on love for each other.
With all we have going on in the world today I can’t help but look to the way we all melded together as a nation 19 years ago and dream a beautiful possible future. 19 years ago we proved we could be one nation, all together, loving and respecting each other, the nation our founding fathers dreamt it would be. If we were that once before, we can be that again. As much as the memories of 9/11 still hurt they bring hope for a better tomorrow for our country. We’ve loved each other in the past, we can do it again.
Each Thursday at 11am my teams and shut everything down for 30-45 minutes. In that brief period of time the whirlwind of our jobs disappears and we’re 100% focused on growth and development focused specifically on one of our core values.
For the values of Grit and Growth Mindset we read the books Grit and Mindset. Each week we’d read a chapter and someone would lead the conversation.
My teams had a great idea on how to tackle the value Do Right. Each week one person sends out an article, a video, or some other type of learning opportunity to the team. On Thursday that teammate leads the discussion on that topic.
This week was a prime example of why I am so grateful for this growth focused time on Thursdays. Grant picked out this video: https://youtu.be/5oLfB3tIyHM that shares the story of how one business has gone to extraordinary steps to make an incredible impact in the lives of people in their community. Not gonna lie, there was a case of the feels going on when I watched it.
While we talked about it as a team it was clear to see that many of us were starting to see bigger dreams of how we could make a bigger impact on those in our community. Sure, the ideas were a little different than the video, but it got the conversation going. As we talked it was clear to see that we all were envisioning a future greater than the one we’d seen before watching this video and having this conversation.
It is so easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of daily activity. In the blink of an eye we can lose sight of the bigger picture and focus on what is directly in front of us. When we get too busy we don’t take the time to dream a new future. By taking time to pause, focus, and dream we are able to create a better future than we’d imagined. How awesome is that?
Thursday Learning Sessions help remind us to pause and dream bigger. They remind us to pause and think. They remind us to focus on growth and learning. It’s not always easy and there are always trade offs made to be focused and present on Thursday, but I’ll gladly make those trade offs any time.
Over the past couple of weeks I’ve mentioned reading the book Waking Up White by Debby Irving. That book led me to some incredible revelations that I’d never noticed before. The power of the author’s story helped me widen my perspective significantly. Over the past week or so I’ve been put some of the ideas to work and have been happy with the results. For clarity, the widening of my perspective led to different actions than I would have taken before reading the book.
On my drive home from Eau Claire today I had a choice to make. I could listen to a wonderful fiction or I could continue to widen my perspective. It took a moment, but I made the right choice and started White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo. In a short period of time I started to see how this would help in similar and yet different ways from Waking Up White and I was immediately glad I started listening to it.
At the time when certain others I may have blogged about recently start taking action to block certain types of diversity training it is more important than ever for all of us to learn what blind spots we may have in our perspective. If anyone has interest in discussing these books and some of the ideas they’ve learned from them please let me know, I’d love to have that conversation! If there are other books you’d recommend to help continue to widen my perspective please let me know, I’d love to queue them up!
My Facebook memories from today left me smiling from ear to ear. Two years ago my buddies and I had one of our more epic weekends together up in Minneapolis. The entire weekend was full of hanging out, chilling, joking, gaming, and just existing with each other. It was awesome!!!
Seeing this picture reminded me of how grateful I am for all of the times we’ve gotten together to hang out in real life (IRL) as we have. COVID and social distancing has prevented us from getting together IRL, but it can’t take away all of the great memories we’ve already created together.
After dinner tonight we went for a walk as a family. It was cold, dreary, rainy, and was getting dark earlier than normal, but I could’ve cared less. This tradition we’ve started through COVID is something I look forward to doing many nights each week. For a brief pause there is no news, there are no phones, there is no COVID, and there is no stress. There is only 100% focused family time while doing physical activity. How awesome is that?
Three day weekends might be about one of my favorite things in the world. Having a bonus day at home is kind of like taking just over a week for a vacation. It usually takes a day or two to relax and settle in on vacation and then sometimes my brain starts looking ahead a couple of days before the vacation is over. By going just over a week my brain has almost a full week to totally chill. A three day weekend is very similar, the one bonus day just brings a deeper state of chill.
Imagine my surprise when I found out we had an extension to the long weekend, well kind of. Gavin’s soccer practice was cancelled due to weather. Due to Dominic’s bike injury he took the night off from workmen out to rest up and heal. This meant we had zero agenda for the night. Coming hot off a long weekend it felt like I’d gotten a bonus night off!
In that bonus time I spent time talking on the phone with family. Becky and I went for a walk in the very light rain. We busted out a family game of the card game Golf. Now we’re all chilling by either reading or writing to wrap up the night before bed. Heck, I’ll be in bed before 8:30!
A long weekend is great, but a bonus night is pretty amazing too! I’m so grateful for pauses from real life like this that seem to pop up out of the blue.
First off, you may read this as a political post. Please note that the intent is far from that. Rather, when thinking on all I’ve seen, read, and heard over the past four plus years it is more a list of lessons I’ve learned through my observations of a bully. It would be easy to pound my chest and shout my political and ideological beliefs for all to hear (though none would most likely listen). In taking what I’ve learned through my journey of gratitude I would rather reflect on how I can live a better life from these experiences.
I also know that in writing this some may get frustrated with me, disagree with me, make judgements about me, and so on. I understand; unfortunately I understand all too well. I’ve often made the mistake of judging others off of something so simple as a yard sign. Part of what I’m writing about today is my reminder to myself of just how wrong that practice is and an ongoing reminder to myself that if I am to close the gap between who I am and who I am called to be I must continue to work on eliminating this thought process from my life.
The definition of a bully per Merriam-Webster is:
a blustering, browbeating person especially: one who is habitually cruel, insulting, or threatening to others who are weaker, smaller, or in some way vulnerable
Again, it would be easy to judge and condemn a bully, wouldn’t it? From the outside we can see their cruelty and the impact their hatred and disdain for others has on the people impacted by them. It would be so easy to have hatred for them and wish them ill will, but wouldn’t that reduce us to their level? So how should we handle a bully?
Hurting others is never right and cannot be allowed or accepted. That must be addressed. Taking action to help others must happen to correct the situation.
In my humble opinion, the first thing to be done is a pause to reflect on ourselves and our own actions and intentions. How often have we battled anger with anger, hate with hate, and fear with fear? How does this fair? Never well. What best can quell anger, hate, and fear is calm, love, and hope. Before finding a way to take action against the bully we must first pause and find our inner calm within the storm, find a way to love our fellow human – even a bully, and hope for a better future. If we react like the bully are we not but a bully ourselves, a bully with different intent? Does that make us better than the one we hope to change?
Personally, I’ve struggled with this as I have seen President Trump as a bully. Through my eyes he fits the very definition shared above. Sadly, I haven’t taken the action to do what I described in the previous paragraph. Instead I’ve displayed those same bullying traits towards him. Part of the reason I’m writing this blog today is to help myself get my brain back into the right space.
One of the best ways I’ve learned to clear my head and find calm, love, and hope is to take time to learn from the actions of someone; especially through those I severely dislike. This is especially beneficial with someone I despise as I can’t help but find ways in which I’ve done the same. It hurts to find that commonality between my actions and those of someone I dislike, but it also helps remind me to hope for a better future. If I can find a way to change and grow so can the other person.
So what have learned while examining the actions of the bully and then looking at my own life through that same lens? This list is not all inclusive but hits home and reminds me of the gap I need to close in my own life.
Name calling is easy, never the right decision, and causes flare ups of unnecessary emotion. How often in my life have I labeled someone to minimize the issue, laugh something off, or demean the person? Has this ever proven effective? No, not in any meaningful way. If I truly treat others with dignity, respect, and love the actions of name calling, labelling, and judging have no useful purpose and make me no better than a bully. When have I used this tactic? Usually when I don’t have a solid logical argument or can’t find (or won’t be bothered to find) a better way to explain my thoughts and when my emotions gets the best of me and I lose my sense of calm.
Treating some as better than others is not the right way. There is no one sex, race, religion, sexuality, social class, economic class, or any other possible differences that makes any one human being more significant, valuable, or important than any other. When have I treated one group as superior to another? How often have I unintentionally acted in a way that showed a difference? What biases do I hold that I can change and learn from? How can I better stay open minded to the sacredness of each human being? Each human life is important and equal, how can I better treat them that way?
Using fear as a driver to motivation is not right. This thinking usually focuses on limited and fixed opportunities, keeping an open mind and abundance thinking lead to better outcomes. How have I moved others to action through fear? What would have been different had I focused on helping to find new opportunities for better outcomes instead of focusing on limited opportunities? Had I led with visions of hope and opportunity how would the outcomes have improved?
Treating everyone the same is not the same as fostering equality. Some people need significantly more help than others which means that not everyone should be treated the same. What do I mean by this? If someone has been oppressed, beaten down, or held back in some way they need additional help and resources to help them get back up on their feet. This is a core tenant of so many religions and philosophies – we must help others who need help. What this means is that to treat everyone equally means some people need more help than others. When have I gotten frustrated that someone has gotten more than me? How have I reacted when I felt something wasn’t “fair”? How can I better respond to help others who need more than I do? When someone feels someone else got more than they did how can I help them understand that this is right? If someone or groups of someone have been oppressed for so long how can I remind myself that they need more to bring them back up which means that others will not necessarily receive the same? This is a difficult one to remember, but easier when I think of my lessons in Scouts… “to help other people at all times…”
These are amongst the lessons that come to mind over the past four years. I’ve got so far to go to close that gap between who I am and who I am called to be. As difficult as it may be to swallow at times I am grateful for the lessons I’ve learned from a bully over the past four years. Yes, it would have been great to have learned lessons from a wise, decent, open minded, and loving leader of our nation over these past four year, but that was not what we’ve had. Full disclosure, I am certain we will most likely not have that in the next four years regardless of the results in November. What I will have is the opportunity to learn more lessons from someone to help me live a life closer to that which I feel is right.
Oh yeah, I did maybe mention something else I was thankful for in the title. Yes, I am incredibly grateful for the 22nd amendment today as well. Regardless of who wins the election in November I know I will only have to learn from them for approximately eight years in total. I can survive anything for eight years, and so will our nation.
Thankful for Forty 