Day 3,020
Growth:
You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.
Marcus Aurelius, Meditations
Completely out of the blue today I was informed of the very unexpected death of a past client, teammate, and friend. At 54 years old he was seemingly one of the most healthy individuals I know, incredibly big hearted, quick to smile and radiate positivity, and so full of life he seemed to be pulled right out of a movie. He was so incredibly vibrant in every way. Three days ago he passed away. Just like that, a light extinguished.
As my brain still grapples with the reality of his passing I keep thinking about many of the decisions I’ve made recently to live better. While my goal is to be hiking in the woods deep into my 90’s I am reminded that tomorrow is promised no one. Work towards the long term goal and dream, but enjoy the ride along the way and be thankful for each breath I am blessed to take.
While my heart weeps for my friend and his family I will sleep with a heart full of gratitude for the day I’ve been blessed to live today.
Appreciation:
Today has been a deeply emotional day in a variety of ways. Starting the day with an excellent bike ride while watching a video of fastpacking the O Circuit in Torres del Paine in Chile. Thinking ahead to all the adventures and goals I’ve set for myself in 2024. Finding out someone passed away too young. Struggling with work stress and challenges. Taking five minutes of stillness to reset my mind and soul (more on that in a bit). Hitting an epic workout that pushed me well outside of my comfort zone but balanced out my mindset.
Highs and lows. Peaks and valleys. What’s interesting to me today is that I’m still feeling positive and optimistic today. It would be easy to let the valleys sink my heart and cause me to be more negative. It would be just as easy to gloss over the tough stuff and focus only on the positive. In either case I would not be experiencing life to its fullest. Life throws us wonderful stuff. Life throws us difficult stuff. By experiencing both we are better able to appreciate all of life.
Today has been an incredibly full day in many ways and I am grateful to have experienced it. I would love to change parts, but I can’t. What I can do is find ways to grow through each portion – delightful and stressful – and use that growth to close the gap between who I am and who I am called to be.
My responses and actions have not been perfect, but I am okay with that. I’ve lived into a better me today than I would have if I were given the same day a year or two ago. I’m grateful for making progress.
Presence:
This afternoon my brain was awash in next steps, projects, tasks, and life. I felt like I was circling a whirlpool and slowly sinking. For whatever reason I set everything down and sat at the table in my office facing my bookshelf. My eyes immediately saw the five minute hourglass on my shelf and I knew what t do next.

I shut off my phone. I closed my laptop. I closed my door. I took my shoes off. I grabbed the hourglass and set it in front of me. I took a deep breath, flipped it, and gave myself the permission AND direction to do nothing but let my mind wander as I stared at the grains slowly draining from top to bottom.
Five minutes of completely undistracted and focused time letting my mind have the space it desperately needs to be. Five minutes of quiet. Five minutes of thought. Five minutes of stillness. Five minutes of healing. Five minutes of clarity. Five minutes of de-cluttering. Five minutes of challenging myself. Five minutes of self-condemnation. Fie minutes of acceptance. Five minutes of purpose. Those five minutes were amongst the most full moments of my entire day.
In the stillness I found peace. Direction. My why. Next steps.
Honestly, it felt like an eternity before the last grain dropped. While incredibly uncomfortable, it felt profoundly soothing. I walked away with clarity, purpose, and direction. The stress and clutter was gone, only life lay ahead of me.
In five minutes I found peace.
Thanks!!!