Two wonderful reasons to remember to listen today, both for very different reasons.
The first was remembering to listen rather than react. My mind quickly races to an answer, long before a question is asked. If I react too quickly I miss hearing the correct question and answer incorrectly. Pause, listen, think, and then respond if necessary. Too often I’ve responded when response was needed. Today reminded me of the power of listening completely and then responding in due time. Remember to listen rather than react.
The second was remembering to listen closely and attentively in the stillness. The voice can be heard anytime, but I must find stillness to hear it. Create space, eliminate noise, and listen with more than my ears. In that space if I listen closely with my soul I will hear the call. Remember to listen closely in the stillness.
Two simple lessons, both profound. Remember to listen, the reward is so much greater than talking and responding.
Pause. Breathe. Relax. Zoom out. Prioritize. Focus. One step. Another step. Breathe in. Action. Breathe out. Action. Repeat. Intentionally present. Enter flow.
What a powerful tool the mind is. Used intentionally the focus is unstoppable. Pause, focus, enter a state of flow. This can be done at literally anytime. Yet I do it far more rarely than I should.
When left reacting to emotion each wave becomes like another would be rescued hoping to save a drowning person by jumping in with them only to be drug down to the depths while adding another victim to the situation. Emotional response to emotional response only compounds and exacerbates the challenge.
Pause to focus, to breathe, and to grasp what can be controlled. Set emotion aside for its proper time and take logical and intentional action to solve the scenario first. Enter a state of flow through focused effort and complete the goal.
Today I was the calm in the center of the storm. I paused. I breathed. I focused. I took logical and intentional action. Emotions were set aside, my presence was targeted at the right task with no distraction. I was in a state of flow until the task was completed.
I realized that I have the opportunity to do this at anytime. I need only choose it. So easy to say and see, so difficult to do. Practice, practice, and more practice.
Today I saw a glimpse of the other side of the gap. The beauty on the other side so close at hand and so difficult to attain. The memory of today will steel my will to practice to work towards it more.
Dominic is starting to work on his Eagle Scout project. The potential project includes creating a dog park in our neighborhood. The first step before he can even put his proposal together is to ask all the nearby home owners if they would be okay with that.
No worries, Dominic just put on his Scout uniform, grabbed his notepad, and started knocking on doors. How wild is that? Even better, he doesn’t know who more than half the people are! Dominic is basically going out and doing cold calls voluntarily in support of a good cause.
That simple action makes me so proud. It’s be so easy to take the easy way out and find a different project, use a over, or some other form of communication. Nope, he’s grabbing the bull by the horns and has received some tremendous feedback already.
One more reason I’m proud of Dominic, he understands that some of the best things in life lay well beyond the point of discomfort. Never give in to fear when courage is the right answer.
Rather than boarding a flight to an ocean beach I was wandering the woods in the snow. Quite the contrast, right? I was exactly where I should be.
Becky and I spent most of our morning at Pike’s Peak outside of MacGregor, Iowa. Due to the cold weather and snowfall we were amongst the few in the entire park. Once we were more than 100 yards from the observation area we never saw another soul.
I drew in breaths of fresh autumn air through my nose and concentrated on soaking in each exquisite little detail of the sights and sensations around me. The bright red leaves and even more scarlet berries of one type of plant. The drops of water resting on the waxy underside of oak leaves. Each little “brick” in the elaborate lattice work of the limestone rock outcroppings. The sensation of the cool winter-ish breeze and snow rushing against my face and tickling the hairs of my beard. The lighting of the woods shifting and transforming as the sun danced amongst the clouds. The music of Becky’s voice as we shared our joys of the wilderness. Each step. Each breath. Each individual second. Pure magic, pure joy.
Our morning was spent in a walking meditation in the stillness of the woods. Exactly where I was called to be in those moments.
If this were my last day I would go peacefully, full of joy, fully satisfied, and with a heart full of love. Today I have lived.
One of my favorite songs, Lucky by Seven Mary Three, has set my brain wandering. The line has been my foundation today.
“Son, time is all the luck you need.”
Jason Ross, Seven Mary Three
Today I’ve been lucky, another day around the world. Another opportunity to live. The fortune to grow further into myself. The chance to practice gratitude for all the splendors of life.
Why this has hit home so hard today is rather interesting. So much of my life I do out of habit, good or bad, for better or worse. When I operate on auto pilot the blinders are put on.
On days like this my mind focuses on seeing clearly and through a different set of lenses. Two questions really put those new glasses on for me.
What if…?
Why?
Today both of those two questions came up for various reasons several times. They helped me see potential paths to a better future, one in which I live into my truest self. The questions led me to some slightly unexpected answers, answers which both clarified and muddied at the same time. No decisions made today, only opportunities created. Time for winnowing will arrive soon, but not yet. More opportunities are to be created before they are to be sifted through.
Quite honestly, these two questions have made my life more complex and yet somehow more simple. The beauty lie in distilling the complicated into the pure essence. While I’d love to boil it all down quickly the aging process is where the magic happens. In so many ways the aging in of itself is the true magic….
So many new thoughts, so many new possibilities, all from asking two questions, all from looking at the world through a different set of lenses.
Today I have been lucky. Lucky to have the opportunity to grow, collect, process, and age. I was given the gift of time.
BTW – I’d be remiss to not mention how much I appreciate our family viewing of Free Guy this evening. The metaphor of lenses comes directly from it as does some of the perspectives drawn today. Fantastic movie with many wonderfully well timed themes for my life.
I have a tendency to make life so much more complex than it needs to be. Busy schedules, technology, financial management, business, and so on. There is so much I pack into life that is unnecessary and self imposed.
In the woods everything fades away. The noise of daily life is muted by the simplicity of existing in nature. Trees who’ve stood before I was born demand my attention. The rocks and hills I observe have existed long before man walked the Earth will remain long after I’m gone. The sounds of the streams provide a more beautiful music than any I would play on my iPhone. Everything I need is there in the woods, in the simplicity, and in that exact moment.
In that moment all of the busyness of life fades from existence. There are no deadlines and tasks, only serenity and wonder. My ego is replaced with the reminder of how small and temporary my life is compared to so much of what exists around me. I am lost in the moment at the very time I find my true self in the woods.
The simplicity of nature surrounding me is deafening.
Today that simplicity was shared with Becky and Gavin (Dominic was refereeing soccer games). The ridges we hiked were so amazing. I could bring a hammock and backpack and stay up there for days. The peacefulness provides a profound state of chill and introspection while my wonder and curiosity often lead me off the trail to observe interesting plants, rocks, and tree roots. Those heavily canopied maple and oak forests are some of the most magical places in the Driftless.
Before getting into my Uber from the airport I was hoping for a driver who wouldn’t want to talk much. It had been a long day and I just wanted a little bit of quiet to chill and unwind. As luck would have it I got the exact opposite and that was exactly what I needed.
Within a minute Alex and I were laughing and trading vacation stories. He shared that he and his wife had just been on a trip to Miami and shared all fun they had by the beach relaxing.
About 10 minutes in Alex shared the story of how he had moved his family away from a rough part of Chicago only to lose his only son in a tragic act of violence. We talked about family and faith.
Another few minutes in and Alex shared the story of how they just had a surprise baby girl not too long ago – even though their other daughter was 21 and they had been told that they couldn’t have any more kids. We talked about the joy of being dads. We talked about having trust in the plan of The Big Dude Upstairs – especially when we don’t quite understand his reasoning.
As our ride was wrapping up we talked about his son and my dad sitting up above and laughing at the two of us in the car joking, laughing, and loving life. We shared our belief that life is best lived with kindness and love for all people. Alex reminded me of the impermanence of life and to appreciate each and every moment we are blessed to have.
Alex brought so much joy to my heart that I can’t even begin to explain it fairly in words. In his willingness to engage in conversation with a stranger, his openness to sharing all aspects of life – good and bad, and his courage to stay positive and optimistic in the most difficult of times reminded me of what is truly important. Love and kindness for each other.
Alex dude, thank you for an incredible ride, amazing conversation, and a truly inspirational time together. Before I got in the car my heart was closed and my skies were cloudy. Big hugs to you and your family Alex, you made my world a better, brighter, and more beautiful place today. I cannot thank you enough!
Thankful for Forty 