Tag: adventure

Thankful for a Reminder to Choose Calm, a Life Well Shared, & the Focus of a First

Day 3,989

Growth:

There is always a choice to make, regardless of the situation.  How will I respond to what’s going on around me?  Hill I lose my cool and get frustrated or will I make the right choice?

Let’s say our delicious pizza we ordered for takeout is going to be 15 minutes late?  Do I get frustrated and angry or do I take a deep breath and have Becky meet me at the local store that has a bunch of locally made great foods and crafts?  Choosing the latter involves having a splendid and engaging conversation with the father of the owner of the store and includes stories about traveling, kids, and how all the proceeds go back to their farm animal rescue farm.  While the choice of frustration and staring at a phone while I wait does nothing but increase my blood pressure, the other leads to a heartwarming story of a blind horse who is essentially adopted by three other sighted horses who start leading it through the fields so it can run freely.  Which choice should I make each time?

Appreciation:

The kayaking trip Becky and I did in the New River Gorge NP today was outstanding.  We obviously took in a ton of the outdoor scenery and loved seeing the 1,000’+ bluffs / mountains on either side, but what I really appreciated was seeing how our relationship has continued to grow stronger throughout the years. 

The two of us in our tandem kayak, laughing about how pissed we used to get at each other when we owned our own aptly named “Divorce Kayak” many years ago.  Rather than getting frustrated we kept encouraging each other, each of us taking the blame on ourselves rather than the other when something didn’t work.  The increased communication as we took on new challenges.  The forgiveness when we realized I’d totally forgotten the sunscreen back in the car when it was time to re-apply.  The way we didn’t have to communicate in full sentences, the way our shared language of past experiences and quotes would get us both laughing and while one would say it first the other was already thinking it.

It hasn’t always been easy, there were definitely some difficulties and challenges, but the more of them we put behind us the more we seemed to grow together.  Spending almost 27 years with someone is wild, we’ve both seen each other at our worst and our best, and we seem to push and help each other grow towards more of our best, almost without trying.  It’s like we both want to be a better version of our self for the other, while always loving the other for who they already are only to somehow still fall deeper in love as they grow more.

As we floated and paddled on the river I just kept pausing to reflect on how grateful I am for a life well shared.

Presence:

The focused presence on the moment is so easily and greatly amplified when I’m doing something for the first time.  Today I was reminded of that while Becky and I were going through some whitewater rapids in an inflatable double kayak!  As we shot down the chutes there was nothing else in the world but the twelve feet across directly in front of me, the rocks and the waves crashing over them, and my paddle as the inflatable kayak bucked and bounced.  For sure, it wasn’t even remotely dangerous, but it was the first time I’d ever done something like that – I was laser focused!  So much fun!

Thankful for Hiking Thoughts, Shared Passions Leading to Increased Resilience, & Quiet Trails

Day 3,987

Growth:

While hiking today there were two thoughts my mind became a little fixated on.

Isn’t it interesting that when we walk on level and flat terrain it is so easy to daydream?  We can almost coast and let muscle memory do the work while we allow our brains to drift off.  As soon as there are roots and rocks and water and sudden drops and cliffs we become hyper focused, fully attentive to our surroundings.

How much of my life has been lived the same way?  When times of ease and simplicity abound it becomes so easy to drift with the surroundings and lose focus.  When difficult times are faced I can’t help but hyper focus.  Where is the proper balance?  How best should I maintain it?  What’s the right way to keep the intentionality and presence high?

The second thought is this – the flow of time in the outdoors is different.  Each moment feels longer and more drawn out as I take in the details of the woods.  Each hour seems to quickly disappear, three hours pass me by and yet I feel I’ve only been gone for thirty minutes.

The paradox of time in hiking in nature, the moments are so long, the hours are so short.

Appreciation:

I’m very grateful for the shared passion for travel Becky and I have.  The travel itself doesn’t need to be crazy or ridiculous, it can be near or far.  The trip could be as short as a day and as long as a month, the act of traveling has brought about so many perspectives for me that I likely never would have known.  In sharing this passion we both are able to grow while also continuing to grow together.

A quote I read on this current trip caught my attention and has been resonating through my mind.  “The voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes,” Marcel Proust.  The act of getting outside my normal life, outside of the way I always look at the same small corner of the world I inhabit allows me the opportunity to see all of it so differently.  My perspectives are changed, my lens cleaned, and my preconceived ideas are tectonically shifted.

As a case in point, this trip has really focused my mind on the Civil War, the reasons behind it, the tragic loss of life as a result, the power of ego and the power of feeling “justified.”  Learning about how Shenandoah National Park decided to open a segregated section for people of color only to have whites complain that they were not being treated as well before the park finally desegregated in 1960.  

My heart breaks when I consider that only 150 years ago many people thought it was okay and their God given right to OWN other humans and that only 65 years ago the park was desegregated.  How was anyone ever capable of deluding themselves into thinking so highly of themselves and showing so little dignity and respect for others?  

This trip has brought so much of these thoughts closer to the surface and cause me to see the world differently, hopefully enough to keep my sense of hurt raw enough to use it for good cause, to help everyone show more love for their fellow humans. 

Had I travelled to these places alone I would still likely have been moved, having travelled them with Becky helps me preserve and hold onto all I’ve experienced, helps me keep my new eyes fresh.

Presence:

Our hike this morning was an ongoing moment of presence.  We started hiking towards Dark Hollow Falls and Rose Falls around 8am and were the only vehicle in the entire parking lot.  From the point we started descending until only moments from reaching our destination miles later we were completely alone in the woods.  

We experienced Dark Hollow Falls completely alone, no one else nearby.  The opportunity to pause, take in the majesty, breathe, enjoy quiet time soaking it all up, and observing it from various angles without any distractions or noise was exceptional.  

By the time we reached Rose Falls we’d encountered three other hikers coming from a different direction, and we had these falls all to ourselves as well.  Sitting and standing on the rock wall watching the water rush over, I couldn’t even guess how long we were there – maybe 5 minutes, maybe 15 minutes.  We just sat quietly and enjoyed the stillness of being in front of something that was here long before us and that will continue to be here long after us.  All alone, savoring the stillness.  

It wasn’t until we were within a mile of the end of the trail that we started encountering people again. First one, then a small family, then a handful of groups, and then a seemingly endless procession of people heading down as we got closer to the parking lot.

All those moments alone in the quiet stillness of that sacred place, wandering heaven on Earth.

Thanks!!!

Thankful for the Campervan as a Reminder of Risk Taking, the Ability to Hike, & Relaxing on a Rock on the Ridge

Day 3,985

Growth:

A few years ago Becky and I decided to put “getting a camper van” into our goals for a title ways out as a present to ourselves for raising both of the boys to adulthood.  The goal was to be measured by dropping Gavin off at college, meaning that he was supposed to be able to adult himself if needed.  About a year in we realized that the cards were lining up a little too well and we should pull the trigger sooner than later.  In the way that life often does, we realized a couple of years after buying it that the timing couldn’t have been better – finances were exactly where they needed to be, there was no worry about job security, and the market had offered up some incredible deals due to the overproduction of campervans during and following COVID.  Had we waited a year we likely would have passed on the entire endeavor, probably waiting until “the timing was right.”

What got me thinking today is how glad I am to have bought it when we did.  Now knowing how the past couple of years have worked out we definitely could have bought it when we did had we known the future, but we likely would have been way to scared to actually pull the trigger, constantly thinking “but what if…”

How often in life do I hesitate out of an overabundance of caution when I should be moving forward?  How often do I skip taking the risk that really could have made all the difference?  When should I take the leap and trust that it will all work out and be okay?  Just last night didn’t I blog about Dad’s confidence in his ability to figure things out – whether on his own or with the help of others?  Where is that gusto in me?  Why do I hesitate?

One more reason for me to be grateful for the campervan – it is an ongoing reminder to take the leap, take the educated risk.  It will all work out, and even if it doesn’t… I’ll figure out a way to make it all work out.

Appreciation:

Once Becky and I got to Shenandoah NP today we decided to do exactly what we both love to do.  We found a couple of trails on the way to our campsite, put on our hiking shoes, and hiked our way to some spectacular sights top the ridge.  

There was no question of our physical ability, we just decided where to go and did it. There was no pausing to consider if it was too far, too steep, or anything like that, we just hit the trail.  Even as we went up the decent elevation increase my heart rate only sped up a little, never going into the yellow zone or beyond, staying nice and chill.  My breathing stayed pretty regular, largely through my nose, only increasing a little on some of the steeper sections.  For sure – I am not bragging up my physical abilities, there are many who put me to shame.  The reason I bring this up is that it is so freeing and liberating to know that as I approach 50 I don’t have to stress whether or not my body can handle what I want to do.

What I’m most grateful for today are the regular habits that keep me ready and able to do what I want to do like this.  My hiking.  Our three runs each week.  Our one (hopefully soon to be two) nights of yoga to build balance and stability.  The way we often get out for a hike or a walk after a large meal like we did this evening.  It would be so easy to skip each of these things and just veg out on the couch or stare at a screen.  By doing these small actions I’m able to do the big things I want to do.  In doing these small actions I find so much more joy and reward from doing the work, from putting in the reps.  There is so much more purpose in there, I often find I enjoy the reps as much of almost more than the hiking itself!

Cheers to the small sacrifices, the simple habits, and all of the things that allow me to live into my best life on the trails!

Presence:

Sitting atop a rock in the sun in Shenandoah.  Taking in the sweeping vistas across the valley from an overlook on the hill.  Quiet calm, no distractions.  Savoring the feel of the cool breeze blowing across my face and arms.  Relaxing and sharing a smile with Becky as we just sit and exist together on the rocks.  Stillness and calm.

Thanks!!!

Thankful for The White Darkness by David Grann

Day 3,535

Based on some recent favorites, I picked up a recommendation to read The White Darkness by David Grann—a gripping true story of one man’s modern-day expedition into the most unforgiving place on earth.

The book follows Henry Worsley, a British explorer and descendant in spirit of the great Antarctic pioneers. In 2015, Worsley set out to achieve something never before accomplished: a solo, completely unsupported and unassisted crossing of Antarctica. His route retraced the one Sir Ernest Shackleton had hoped to complete in 1914 before his ship, Endurance, was trapped in the ice.

No spoilers here—the suspense of not knowing how Worsley’s journey unfolded made the read all the more powerful.

A few quotes stuck with me:

Passion for something can easily tip into obsession, which is a dangerous thing, especially when those affected are the very people who so loyally stand and wait.

Henry Worsley

Men go out into the void spaces of the world for various reasons. Some are actuated simply by a love of adventure, some have the keen thirst for scientific knowledge, and others again are drawn away from the trodden paths by the ‘lure of little voices,’ the mysterious fascination of the unknown.

David Grann

This book is a short but profound reflection on ambition, endurance, legacy, and the blurry line between courage and compulsion.

Thanks!!!

Thankful for Using Tech Correctly, the Deck I Built with Dad, & Hiking (again)

Day 3,346

Growth:

Technology can really help us build connections when used correctly. Today we were able to FaceTime with each of the boys, yesterday we did the same with all four of us at the same time, even though we’re in different states and continents currently! Gavin was able to share pictures and jokes via our favorite social media messenger app. Throughout the day Dominic, Gavin, and I shared music we each enjoyed. Gavin sent all of us pics of all the sights he has seen in Germany. Becky and I used technology the right way for us while hiking, we shut it off completely and enjoyed conversation without electronics. When used the right way (and turned off often), what a gift technology is!

Appreciation:

This afternoon I was removing some old boards form our deck. It was build by Dad and I about twenty years ago and one of my projects for next year is to build a new deck. As I started taking it apart this afternoon I couldn’t help but think back often to the time I spent with Dad building it in the first place. I initially felt a little sad about taking apart something we’d built together, but I quickly realized that what we built together many years ago was not what I was taking apart now. This was only the deck, old beaten up and weathered boards. What we’d built back then were poignant memories of working together, of enjoying each other’s company, and of spending time with each other. The boards may be removed, but the memories not be erased.

So many moments of learning to work together as we built that deck! We learned about how much wood we could actually load into his pickup. We then found out that there was a weird policy at the store we bought it from and one of us had to stay with half the load while the other delivered the first load, unloaded it at the house, and then drove back. I personally learned why it is not a good idea to pull out too rapidly with a truck bed full of decking materials. Dad learned how much he would have appreciated having a cell phone to figure out what was taking me so long to come back for the second load as I was re-loading the lumber into the truck from off the pavement in a somewhat busy road. As you can imagine, as we traded stories afterwards we laughed and laughed! What wonderful memories the entire project was!

The things we build with our hands will eventually age and turn into dust and ash. The time we spend with loved ones making memories will burn in our souls forever.

Presence:

I kind of feel like this is becoming a bit of a broken record, but getting outside and hiking the trails with Becky to start off the day is pretty epic! Nothing quite like the fresh air and exercise while enjoying the views from the bluffs. Certainly my happy place, the trails. A couple of specific moments really stuck out. Standing atop Miller’s Bluff and taking in the view of the city below and river, woods, and bluff surrounding. Catching a spectacular fall scent form the leaves, almost a spicy old cigar box kind of smell (you gotta trust me, it is a wonderful aroma!). Throw in focused time with Becky and I talking as we hike and I couldn’t ask for much more than that!

Thanks!!!