Tag: solitude

Thankful for Family Motivation, Balance and Counterbalance, & Ninety Minutes of Churning Calm

Day 3,022

Growth:

As a family we continue to push and motivate each other to more than we would likely do on our own. Thanks to wanting to keep up with my sons while hiking on our next adventures I hit the gym for a solid Saturday workout. Gavin asked Dominic to lead him in a speed workout for track. They pushed each other and Dominic worked Gavin so hard that Gavin tossed his cookies at the end of the run… twice. The motivation of Dominic helped Gavin push himself further than he likely would have on his own. 

Tonight I’m very appreciative for the ways we help push and motivate each other as a family.

Appreciation:

Life is sometimes about balance and counterbalance. Last night I wrote about being grateful for the high umber of connections I made throughout the day. So much of my day was spent in interactions with others and engaging with them. Today has been very much the opposite and I’m just as appreciative of it.

The morning kicked off with a short conversation with Dominic before we all split up to go our separate ways for our workouts this morning. I had my AirPods in while I knocked out 90 minutes of solo stairclimbing with no interaction with anyone else in the gym. Dominic and I were going in different directions afterwards and I was off to pick up Gavin before Dominic left for work. Gavin and I talked for a little while on our drive, but then it was off to showers and then lunch. We took Leia for a four mile hike and spent much of it in silence as we both took in the stillness of the forest. Some more interaction on our way home and then I was off to the grocery store. 

At the store my AirPods were in and I enjoyed one of my favorite solo experiences – listening to music amongst a crowd of people. I was in the world, but not of the world. I know, sounds goofy, but it feels amazing to find a pocket of “aloneness” in the midst of a crowd. 

More quick interactions with Gavin as we unloaded groceries, and then he was off to hang out with his buddies. As I type I’m surrounded by the cacophony of laughter that is exploding up from the basement stairs. They’re obviously having a blast and I’m enjoying the second hand sounds of it. 

It’s largely been a day of disconnectedness and I’m grateful for it. Such a beautiful counterbalance to yesterday!

Presence:

For ninety minutes I climbed steps to nowhere while sweating my butt off and smiling the entire way. I had my audiobook on and just kept putting one foot in front of the other for much longer than I’d planned. My hope was to do about half of what I did, but I was feeling great and decided to keep on going. 

In many ways it reminded me of the state of mind I used to get into during long distance runs, when I was kind of zoning out to the world, but traveling inward and listening to and engaging with my thoughts with so much more clarity than other times in life. The ongoing monotony of the motion kind of creates its own stillness, not too different than what I wrote about a couple of days ago with watching the hourglass.

Ninety minutes of a churning calm, ninety moments of presence.

Thanks!!!

Thankful for Solitude in Nature, Travel Tangents, & Getting Lost in a Story

Day 3,018

Growth:

2024 started off with finishing up my most recent reading of Awareness by Anthony de Mello. One of the passages that really hit home for me was this as he talks about finding peace and awareness through becoming okay with being alone…

It will help, too, if you return to nature. Send the crowds away, go up to the mountains, and silently commune with the trees and flowers and animals ad birds, with sea and clouds and sky and stars. …Get back to nature, go up in the mountains. Then you will know that your heart has brought you to the vast desert of solitude, there is no one at your side, absolutely no one. 

At first this will seem unbearable. But it is only because you are unaccustomed to aloneness. If you manage to stay there for a while, the desert will suddenly blossom into love. Your heart will burst into song. And it will be spring-time forever, the drug will be out, you’re free. Then you will understand what freedom is, what love is, what happiness is, what reality is, what truth is, what God is.”

Anthony de Mello, Awareness

From my backpacking experience last year I can start to understand what he means by this quote. Being alone in the woods, experiencing solitude, is magic for the soul.

Appreciation:

Vacations… ahh… one of my happy places and favorite activities! This evening I was working on a few details on planning one trip and then went down a bit of a rabbit hole cleaning out some old travel emails. That task somehow parlayed itself into digging into old vacation photos. While digging into the old photos I was reminded to pull some additional for a few different friends relating to trips and had the opportunity to re-live some of those past trips. 

Some of the reading in Awareness tonight was focused on being present while on trips, not living behind the camera and only seeing the trip through the lens. I am grateful for the advice I got somewhere along the road about taking just enough photos to spark and clarify the memories, but not so much to miss the moment. It is a difficult balance, being present in the moment while also capturing just enough to re-live it over and over again and to maximize the memory dividend.

LOL – there I go again, drifting off on another vacation and travel related tangent! That’s exactly what I am thankful for this evening!

Presence:

While there were a handful of moments of presence throughout the day I’m going to kind of cheat and go back to last night. Gavin recommended Timeline by Michael Crichton a little over a year ago and it has been sitting on my nightstand ever since. Last night as I prepped for sleep I decided it was time to bust it out and give it a read. The next thing I knew almost an hour had passed and I was deep into the story. 

What a gift it is to get lost in a wonderful book! When written well our minds can clearly picture all that is happening while also making connections to real life and piece together where the story may be going. Each page leads us further down the path, committing us more and more to the story. Today I’m grateful for those moments of presence while reading, I’m off to see if I can replicate it again!

Thanks!!!