Day 2,921

Growth:

I have a compulsion for fixing things, it is in my nature and sometimes it is a wonderful strength. There are other times when it can cause issues and unnecessary challenges. The wisdom is in realizing which time is which and acting accordingly.

I prefer to take action rather than sit back and let things happen. My default is motion rather than pause. Sometimes taking time to pause and let nature run its course is the right choice, but I struggle to do that.

When these two butt up against each other I struggle to figure out the right way to react – to push forward and fix or to pause and the let fix happen on its own without my intervention.

Today I am remembering to pause to weigh out which response is correct prior to acting. The pause frustrates me, but I know it is the right solution, not action. I must remember to pause and think, to be aware of the situation, and to then choose the right response rather than let my nature take its course.

Appreciation:

Throughout the day it is so easy to get stressed and worked up about so many things. So many possible stressors and challenges that can cause me to get agitated or draw away my focus. Each irritant compounds with the last until I’m focused on the entirely wrong things. On the contrary, the same thing can happen with good things too. It is so easy to allow the gravity of little positivities pull me off track and in the wrong direction.

Tonight was a wonderful example of how important it is to remember what is truly important, to focus on what is truly important, and to let those relatively meaningless things – positive and negative – roll of me like water on a duck’s back and to stay focused on what is truly important.

Presence:

While driving home from Eau Claire I had a moment of pause to appreciate the views of the bluffs as I drove through Arcadia. I had an awesomely intense moment of purposeful presence to soak in all around me. The dark green grass, the steel blue clouds, the white mist rising from the valleys of the bluffs with a sea of green leaves broken up by patches of oranges, reds, and yellows. The song Crossfire by Brandon Flowers vibrating the inside of the car as the windshield wipers slowly pushed away the raindrops. For a moment there was nothing else in the world, only existence in that moment, and it was amazing.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,920

Growth:

Throughout our greatest challenges we find opportunities to grow beyond what we thought possible. By actively re-living those difficult moments with others we learn to handle the next challenges more successfully. Today I’m grateful for honest feedback helping to create growth through a difficult time.

Appreciation:

After as busy as this soccer season has been I’m certainly not disappointed that tonight’s game was cancelled due to lightning. With the game first being delayed and then cancelled I had the opportunity to have some bonus time with Becky and Leia on a walk after supper and then some more bonus time with Becky and Leia on the couch. I love soccer season, but having a surprise reducing the games this week by one was pretty sweet.

Presence:

There’s a magic to running in the woods in the darkness of early morning. Everything is so calm and still, serenity with each breath. This morning we had a view of Orion and so many stars throughout most of our way back. The world is so quiet in that moment, it is like snuggling into a warm sweatshirt of stillness and solitude.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,919

Growth:

The mindset I start an activity with really has a profound impact on my perception of the activity if I don’t pause to acknowledge my mindset. Church today seemed a bit quiet, subdued, and just a bit off. Can you guess my mindset when I walked into church? Yup, what I was feeling was a perfect reflection of myself. What helped me see that it was me was a simple gesture by two friends as they walked up for communion. Both tapped me on the shoulder and smiled as they passed me. When I caught myself smiling at them and the excited toddler a row in front of us.

Yet again it was awareness for the win. Pause to reflect on how I’m feeling and thinking, take time to be aware of my thoughts and then choose the appropriate mindset.

Appreciation:

Having kids means that we sometimes have to help them through some difficult situations. This one has been boiling up for a while and it’s been frustrating for sure, but there’s also been some opportunities for learning. They’ve gotten more experience in working through difficult situations, asking questions to help understand the challenge, and putting ego aside in order to focus on what’s truly important. It’s difficult and I wish there was a different way to learn than through this level of frustration, but I’m grateful for the opportunity for them to learn and grow as a person.

Presence:

This afternoon was likely a “last” for us. Becky and I pulled our pontoon off the water after taking it out for one last ride. Based on the declining use of it over the past few years we realized it is time to sell it and move on to other hobbies like canoeing and kayaking.

Knowing this was our last voyage on the Serenity Now!!! (bonus points to those of you who are Seinfeld fans and understand the reference) we took a little extra time to appreciate all the fun we’ve had as a family, all the memories we created. It was a sad moment in realizing that we are moving on, but a happy moment in remembering all the joy we had on it.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,918

Growth:

So humbling to blog about this one, times like this I really wish I would have kept my writing to myself, but no going back now and especially when the only reason is to protect my pride / ego.

While driving today I got frustrated several times. There were a couple of drivers totally camped out in the left lane rather than moving back into the right lane after passing like they should have. The number of people not using their blinkers almost made my head explode. So frustrating, such easy things to do, such simple ways to maintain the order we should all have. Argh!!!

All that said, really, why was I so frustrated? Even after we’d passed them by and I’d physically moved on I had still not emotionally moved on. What a waste of energy! There was no reason to be that worked up in the first place let alone holding that frustration for as long as I did. Definitely something for me to work. Let it go, do right but don’t judge others for it, attempt to lead through example

What I’m grateful for today is the reminder of the importance of awareness. Without it I would have just been frustrated, with it I’m able to grow through the experience.

Appreciation:

What a day it has been! There’ve been so many moment of joy, thought, and reflection. Many positive things, working through some frustrations, and everything in between.

Honestly, this entire day has been a blessing. Connection with loved ones, time in thought, and time in rest. Sitting on the couch as I type this I’m listening to the wind chimes outside our window and feeling the cool breeze on my legs. I’m the only one awake in the house (Becky & Leia asleep, Gavin with friends) and all is peaceful. The day has been full of life.

Presence:

Leia got to go on her first hike today! We kept it short, but there was a lot of elevation gain to help wear her out. She was totally loving every step she took, bounding and bouncing and stopping to smell everything. Turns out she’s also a huge fan of chewing on acorn caps. So much fun experiencing the trail through the eyes of a pup!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,917

Growth:

Something that never ceases to make me chuckle is the number of times I’m working on something and think about how nice it would be to have a tool from a past training to help out and then realize that the right tool to use is one that I created for a past training. Such was the case this morning as I was prepping for a conflict resolution conversation and wanted a way to help organize my thoughts to maximize effectiveness. Lo and behold, I found exactly what I was looking for, the conversation outline from a difficult conversations training class I created about four years ago!

I should probably remember to turn more of my life lessons into trainings – not necessarily for others, but for myself in the future!

Appreciation:

What was supposed to be an hour of helping Gavin with two quick tasks turned out to be a couple hour long adventure and opportunity for the two of us to bond. We went from home to the DMV to home to the DMV to Kohls to Target and finally back to home. In between we had conversations, plot twists, even cameo appearances! Just when we thought it was over there was even another act waiting as I took Gavin’s soccer coat to him at the Logan homecoming game.

The details aren’t important (though we will both be laughing about them for quite some time), but the time together was priceless even if it wasn’t planned to be that way. As Bob Ross would have said, the entire experience was a happy accident!

Presence:

Sitting on the couch at home enjoying a moment of quiet brought a wonderful surprise, the pitter patter of rain falling outside our open windows. Such a wonderful sound to relax to, deeply centering at any time regardless of what’s happening in the world around me.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,916

Growth:

Gotta love how sometimes divine intervention works out! This morning I got my weekly email from Ryan Holiday (which you can also check out here: https://ryanholiday.net/blog/) and there was a specific paragraph I sent to Becky and the boys.

Everything is an opportunity for excellence. The now famous passage from Marcus Aurelius is that the impediment to action advances action, that what stands in the way becomes the way. But do you know what he was talking about specifically? He was talking about difficult people! He was saying that difficult people are an opportunity to practice excellence and virtue–be it forgiveness or patience or cheerfulness. And so it goes for all the things that are not in our control in life. So when I find myself in situations big and small, positive or negative, I try to see each of them as an opportunity for me to be the best I’m capable of being in that moment. It doesn’t matter who we are, where we are, we can always do this.

Ryan Holiday

This evening I had the opportunity to live into this. I’m not sure that I handled it as well as I could have, but this thought kept rolling through my head and helped to point me closer to the right direction. That said, I really would have been fine with not having the opportunity to grow through dealing with this specific issue this evening 😉

Appreciation:

At the soccer game this evening (source of the thought above in the Growth section) I thoroughly enjoyed spending time with the entire crowd. Throughout the years both Dominic and Gavin have played on teams with players from the other high school and we’ve gotten to know the parents very well. In many ways it was a lot like a soccer family reunion! I’m pretty sure I spent more time in conversation with parents wearing the opposing team’s colors than our own, definitely not par for the course.

It was a blast to rekindle friendships and catch up on all the life that’s gone on since we last saw each other, so much more than just the game we all came to watch.

Presence:

My ride home from work was full of a solid silence as I shut off both music and audiobooks to think through an immensely frustrating challenge. That quiet time focused in thought helped me work through the initial emotion and then start developing a strategy for resolution. The silence was deafening and helped drown out the entire world aside from my challenge. So thankful for those moments of quiet to help calm my brain and provide clarity towards right action.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,915

Growth:

Leverage really makes all the difference. Taking time to pause, listen, consider, ask, listen, observe, create, test, re-design, and then implement in the right spot. It reminds me of the story of Dad and I working in the kitchen when he shared the importance of taking time and using leverage (long story – short version is that he showed me up with a simple movement after I was sweaty, ornery, and frustrated).

Today was a day in which it wasn’t my hardest day of work ever, but it is was likely one of the most productive. I took time to listen, to observe, to think, and then to apply laser like focus in the one exact spot which would provide maximum results.

What then really was a growth moment today was seeing how many areas of my work (and life) I should be applying this concept to rather than just reacting or following habit. Where can I make the most of leverage? Today I saw the world differently.

Appreciation:

Business is business, but often times those we work with become good friends in addition to business teammates and associates. Today I was fortunate to have lunch with someone who fits this bill and it was awesome to re-connect! The best part is that there really wasn’t any past business covered, only sharing our life experiences since and trading books and health tips. LOL – may not sound like the most exciting conversation, but trust me, it was awesome (maybe I’m just getting older than I care to admit if I find conversations on diet and health awesome).

What I’m grateful for today is the number of these relationships that continue in my life. They started through business, but have grown beyond that and maintain after the business portion has gone. So much fun to reconnect with friends!

Presence:

What is this? A night at home with nothing going on? A night home alone for a little bit with just the puppy and I? No way!!! This was for reals, a night with nothing going on during the soccer season. Still feels like a dream!

In all seriousness, having a small handful of time alone (while not driving) felt pretty excellent. There have also been pockets with Becky and Gavin too which has really helped it to feel like a very relaxing evening. At this pace I’m going to head off to bed early, maybe read in bed for a little bit, and keep the relaxation going!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,914

Growth:

I’ve written about finding the edges a handful of times throughout the past year. The edges of the comfort zone, the edges of impossibility, the edges of success and failure. When I push to find those edges growth is most likely to occur.

While there’s certainly an upper and lower limit to this next point I’ve found that one of the best times to explore the edges is when I’m tired and run down. There’s a point to which the tiredness increases my nerves and makes everything look a little more clear. If I focus on that sensation and lean into it I seem to find the edges more clearly.

For sure, I won’t run myself ragged just to get to that point, but when it happens I need to remember to have even more awareness, to really push to explore the edges, and to maximize the potential for growth.

Appreciation:

Today there were a handful of interactions which helped as guideposts to living towards my purpose of brightening lives through shared experiences. Each touched my heart at a very deep level in several different ways. Some were in person, some via text, some through email, and some over the phone – all had the commonalities of touching my soul and helping me grow. To each of you who created those impacts today – thank you!

Presence:

This morning I had a moment of extreme clarity at work. In the heat of the moment I forgot one simple step I was going to do and instead ran right into the next item on my list. The moment I realized I had forgotten that one small step this morning caused immediate frustration. As I worked to correct the mistake I paid extra attention to the swath of chaos my mistake made for myself and my team. Afterwards I paused and reflected on how the mistake was made and the leading indicators which could have predicted the likelihood of the mistake being made. I then adjusted and then shared the thought with a teammate for confirmation. Throughout each step I was laser focused so as to learn and grow from the experience. It was painful, but an excellent way to grow and learn!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,913

Growth:

Today a friend of mine told me they were having a bad day. Very honest, open, and full of the grace they were giving themselves. “They can’t all be great days, and this has been a tough one.” This was coming from one of the most positive people I’ve ever met.

I often struggle with accepting and admitting when I have a bad day. My pride gets in the way. The mindset of having to live into a specific role and identity cause me to fake my way through it. I don’t give myself any slack for having a bad day, I try to figure it out and fix it. Sometimes I’d be much better to accept it, give myself a break, and live into a better tomorrow. LOL – even after writing a book about these types of feelings I STILL struggle with them.

Today I’m grateful for the example my friend lived. Not only did I not think any less of her (as I sometimes fear others will think of me if I admitted I was having a bad day), my respect for her grew significantly. I’ll remember the interaction the next time I “have the dips” as Gavin calls them and will respond accordingly.

Appreciation:

Dominic’s college experience is only a month old did I’m absolutely glowing with excitement for all he’s already experienced. I wrote the following to a buddy this evening after Becky and I had been on the phone with Dominic hearing about his week:

We were just talking with him tonight and I’m thinking he’s good for the moment… he’s on the rugby team, the rocket team, is working 10 hours a week as the IT person in his dorm, and just let us know he’s heading up to Duluth to rock climb the sea caves with the Climbing Club this weekend. All that while taking honors classes and studying a few hours each day. Oh yeah, and he’s been out late night longboarding at Prospect Park. Talk about living his best life!

So pumped to hear about how Dominic continues to grow into his best self!

Presence:

There were a couple of meetings today which required my full focus doc attention. While I often blog about something in nature in this section I couldn’t help but focus on how present I was in both of those conversations. They were incredibly important and I needed to be fully engaged to do my best. Being in those conversations that completely led to excellent and productive meeting and next steps. So glad I slowed my crazy squirrel brain down to be in the moment!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,912

Growth:

This morning we had quite possibly the most influential sermon I’ve ever had on the topic of forgiveness. Our priest suffered a terrible tragedy when he was a child when his grandparents were the victims of robbery and murder. He’s spoken on this topic – forgiveness – in the past, but this time in particular really hit home at a deeper level.

What stood out to me the most was the reminder that there must be an accounting of the hurt, of the pain inflicted, before true forgiveness can begin. From there we can work through the process of forgiving the individual, not once, but over and over again while wanting the best for them. This provides the balance of justice AND mercy, what we should all provide others.

I’m grateful for how he pointed out how sometimes this can be easier when it involves someone we hardly know, but more exponentially more difficult when involving someone we know well and love.

This is still processing in my brain, I need to watch it again a couple of more times to let it fully seep in (you can check it out here if you’d like – https://www.youtube.com/live/wNjnmXTfpvA?si=MLUinDNMpupcxcF1&t=1353). So much to unpack, so many levels to process this at to fully get it – at least as much as we as people can do.

Appreciation:

After all the busyness of this past week (or more) today was a beautiful respite. We hit the grocery store early, walked the dog, did some housework, and still had time to kick back and relax a bit. Much of the time we were all heading in our own directions, but there was still a solid chunk of time spent together. Having a little downtime to breathe felt amazing as will the early-ish bedtime this evening.

Presence:

There was a deeply moving moment at church today. I’m still not sure how I got to the exact emotion, but there was such a deep sense of gratitude for my Grandma Lamping that I was almost brought to tears. The older I get the more I wish I would have spent more time getting to know her better, to hearing more of her stories from her own memory. She was an incredibly amazing woman who brought so much joy to my life, but I know I only saw a fraction of the full person she was. Through the stories of others I have started to see how extraordinary she was. Had she lived longer and I matured earlier I feel there is so much I could have learned from her. This morning I couldn’t help but feel more connected to her at a deep level and I was so grateful for the flood of emotions and memories at church this morning.

Thanks!!!