Is there anything better than living into our purpose? Seizing the opportunity to do what we were intended to do is rewarding on so many levels. Today I was fortunate to have opportunity to work on closing the gap between who I am and who I should be. Throw in a couple of other insightful moments which helped me see how to close the gap more clearly and it quickly became a +2 day.
Appreciation:
During a conversation with a colleague today we got on the topic of coaching leaders. I was reminded of how much the coaching of some of my employees has helped me grow and lead better. Their openness, honesty, and directness really helped open my eyes to how I could improve my communication and leadership styles. They helped coach me on how to clarify a message in a way that helps them more easily digest it. Their feedback guided me towards pausing to respond in different styles based on the unique individual I was working with.
Offering up potentially difficult feedback can be a struggle and intimidating, but they handled it with grace and incredibly professionally. Thanks to the way they brought it up I was more easily able to absorb it and take it all in.
Overall, they’ve left their fingerprints on my leadership style and have helped me become a better communicator. Today I was reminded of how thankful I am for the way they have, and continue to, coach and lead me!
Presence:
This morning I had the opportunity to meet with someone who is quickly becoming a wonderful friend. We were talking about a handful of topics including our personal histories, long term career goals, and ways to turn dreams into reality. The conversation was so engaging that my mind was blown when I realized 75 minutes had gone by in the blink of an eye! What an awesome way to start my work day off on the right note early in the morning!
Over the past couple of days I’ve found myself joking with others about how I wished I had more time. Funny that my brain goes to wanting more rather than pausing to ask how I’m using my time and what I’m focusing my time on. Between those three variables – amount of time, efficiency, and prioritization – my default is to wish for the one I do not have control over. This has been an interesting lens to view the world through today, it’s led me to make better choices of how and where I put the time I have.
Appreciation:
This may be something I’ve blogged about before, but I am so appreciative for my experiences of driving in snowy conditions while growing up in northern Wisconsin. With our first true snowfall of the year the conditions were less than ideal, especially for a day when I was commuting an hour and a half.
Thanks to learning to drive on snow and ice covered roads up north I was much ore relaxed in spite of the slick conditions. Take a deep breath, hold the wheel lightly, slow down a bit, give more space, test the roads and braking when no one is nearby, stay calm, stay focused. Nothing to it!
My day was pretty jammed as it was, not having the additional stress of driving in snow was greatly appreciated.
Presence:
During my drive home this evening my audiobook shared a story that caused me to hit the Pause button. The story resulted in a confluence of three different ideas in a very unexpected way. It was one of those proverbial “lightbulb” moments. I had to pause, focus, and work through the newly created idea while it was fresh in mind, a lump of wet clay quickly starting to firm up. In those moments my mind was fully concentrated on the task at hand and it was an awesome sensation!
Just like I guessed yesterday, “Yesterday Mike’s” hard work really made “Today Mike’s” life much better today!
For reals, what a difference some preparations can make! Doing a few bonus steps yesterday when I had time really helped me be a better me today.
Appreciation:
This morning I ran with Becky. After work I lifted weights. This evening I went to yoga. 155 minutes of physical activity. In each I felt the results of my increased activity level from the past month and change. I’m feeling increased strength and flexibility and endurance – not too shabby! I’m grateful for the goals I’ve set for myself this year, they’re truly helping me grow into 24-4-47 (2024 is dedicated to the fitness of my next 47 years).
Presence:
As we went into final rest at yoga this evening I found myself smiling. Having all four of us at yoga, voluntarily, and sweating our butts off was ppretty awesome. It was time we shared as a family. It was an opportunity to help the boys find more ways to stay in shape and battle stress. It was us sharing something we enjoy doing. That moment when it all sunk in, all I could do was smile and soak it in.
There have been a few times today when “Today Mike” went out of his way to do “Tomorrow Mike” a favor. Whether gassing up the car, packing my workout clothes, or doing a clean up of my inbox there were times when I could have just chilled and relaxed today, but realized that my day will go so much more smoothly thanks to these actions today.
Appreciation:
This weekend I’ve gotten myself hooked on the book Let My People Go Surfing: The Education of a Reluctant Businessman by Patagonia founder Yvon Chouinard. It is quickly proving to be another one of those divine moments of catching the right book at the right time. Throughout the first half of the book I’m catching myself having to rewind often to allow key concepts to truly sink in. For a variety of reasons I’m very thankful for stumbling upon this gem at the right time!
Presence:
This morning I woke up and got after it right out of the gate. I started up my coffee and busted out my Reminders app to make sure I got everything down. From there I started knocking out tasks one after another after another. I was the only one awake, drinking my coffee, doing stuff around the house. So quiet and chill even though I was getting chores done. Oddly serene way to start a Sunday!
As a family we continue to push and motivate each other to more than we would likely do on our own. Thanks to wanting to keep up with my sons while hiking on our next adventures I hit the gym for a solid Saturday workout. Gavin asked Dominic to lead him in a speed workout for track. They pushed each other and Dominic worked Gavin so hard that Gavin tossed his cookies at the end of the run… twice. The motivation of Dominic helped Gavin push himself further than he likely would have on his own.
Tonight I’m very appreciative for the ways we help push and motivate each other as a family.
Appreciation:
Life is sometimes about balance and counterbalance. Last night I wrote about being grateful for the high umber of connections I made throughout the day. So much of my day was spent in interactions with others and engaging with them. Today has been very much the opposite and I’m just as appreciative of it.
The morning kicked off with a short conversation with Dominic before we all split up to go our separate ways for our workouts this morning. I had my AirPods in while I knocked out 90 minutes of solo stairclimbing with no interaction with anyone else in the gym. Dominic and I were going in different directions afterwards and I was off to pick up Gavin before Dominic left for work. Gavin and I talked for a little while on our drive, but then it was off to showers and then lunch. We took Leia for a four mile hike and spent much of it in silence as we both took in the stillness of the forest. Some more interaction on our way home and then I was off to the grocery store.
At the store my AirPods were in and I enjoyed one of my favorite solo experiences – listening to music amongst a crowd of people. I was in the world, but not of the world. I know, sounds goofy, but it feels amazing to find a pocket of “aloneness” in the midst of a crowd.
More quick interactions with Gavin as we unloaded groceries, and then he was off to hang out with his buddies. As I type I’m surrounded by the cacophony of laughter that is exploding up from the basement stairs. They’re obviously having a blast and I’m enjoying the second hand sounds of it.
It’s largely been a day of disconnectedness and I’m grateful for it. Such a beautiful counterbalance to yesterday!
Presence:
For ninety minutes I climbed steps to nowhere while sweating my butt off and smiling the entire way. I had my audiobook on and just kept putting one foot in front of the other for much longer than I’d planned. My hope was to do about half of what I did, but I was feeling great and decided to keep on going.
In many ways it reminded me of the state of mind I used to get into during long distance runs, when I was kind of zoning out to the world, but traveling inward and listening to and engaging with my thoughts with so much more clarity than other times in life. The ongoing monotony of the motion kind of creates its own stillness, not too different than what I wrote about a couple of days ago with watching the hourglass.
Ninety minutes of a churning calm, ninety moments of presence.
There is a time to be a resource for others and to spend time helping them. There is also a time to ask others for help and appreciate the resources they provide. The former is so easy, the latter so much more difficult. Today I was reminded of how important it is to ask for help.
Appreciation:
Today has been a day of connections. Throughout the entirety of the day I’ve been interacting with others almost nonstop. Each has brought joy to my day. Typically I prefer more time on my own, but the increased number of interactions seemed like exactly what I needed today. To everyone I had a conversation with – THANK YOU!!!
Presence:
My run this morning with Becky felt especially awesome for a couple of reasons.
First off, she headed out of town for the weekend so our run was our last bit of time together likely until our run on Monday morning. That meant I was extra focused on enjoying the time with her.
Secondly, my legs felt totally exhausted from the combination of different types of workouts throughout the week. The tiredness added extra focus from the additional effort to keep on moving. Each step was felt a little more than normal.
Waking up early for our 5am run is never easy, but I never regret it afterwards. The presence and focus it brought my mind early in the morning was awesome!
You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.
Marcus Aurelius, Meditations
Completely out of the blue today I was informed of the very unexpected death of a past client, teammate, and friend. At 54 years old he was seemingly one of the most healthy individuals I know, incredibly big hearted, quick to smile and radiate positivity, and so full of life he seemed to be pulled right out of a movie. He was so incredibly vibrant in every way. Three days ago he passed away. Just like that, a light extinguished.
As my brain still grapples with the reality of his passing I keep thinking about many of the decisions I’ve made recently to live better. While my goal is to be hiking in the woods deep into my 90’s I am reminded that tomorrow is promised no one. Work towards the long term goal and dream, but enjoy the ride along the way and be thankful for each breath I am blessed to take.
While my heart weeps for my friend and his family I will sleep with a heart full of gratitude for the day I’ve been blessed to live today.
Appreciation:
Today has been a deeply emotional day in a variety of ways. Starting the day with an excellent bike ride while watching a video of fastpacking the O Circuit in Torres del Paine in Chile. Thinking ahead to all the adventures and goals I’ve set for myself in 2024. Finding out someone passed away too young. Struggling with work stress and challenges. Taking five minutes of stillness to reset my mind and soul (more on that in a bit). Hitting an epic workout that pushed me well outside of my comfort zone but balanced out my mindset.
Highs and lows. Peaks and valleys. What’s interesting to me today is that I’m still feeling positive and optimistic today. It would be easy to let the valleys sink my heart and cause me to be more negative. It would be just as easy to gloss over the tough stuff and focus only on the positive. In either case I would not be experiencing life to its fullest. Life throws us wonderful stuff. Life throws us difficult stuff. By experiencing both we are better able to appreciate all of life.
Today has been an incredibly full day in many ways and I am grateful to have experienced it. I would love to change parts, but I can’t. What I can do is find ways to grow through each portion – delightful and stressful – and use that growth to close the gap between who I am and who I am called to be.
My responses and actions have not been perfect, but I am okay with that. I’ve lived into a better me today than I would have if I were given the same day a year or two ago. I’m grateful for making progress.
Presence:
This afternoon my brain was awash in next steps, projects, tasks, and life. I felt like I was circling a whirlpool and slowly sinking. For whatever reason I set everything down and sat at the table in my office facing my bookshelf. My eyes immediately saw the five minute hourglass on my shelf and I knew what t do next.
I shut off my phone. I closed my laptop. I closed my door. I took my shoes off. I grabbed the hourglass and set it in front of me. I took a deep breath, flipped it, and gave myself the permission AND direction to do nothing but let my mind wander as I stared at the grains slowly draining from top to bottom.
Five minutes of completely undistracted and focused time letting my mind have the space it desperately needs to be. Five minutes of quiet. Five minutes of thought. Five minutes of stillness. Five minutes of healing. Five minutes of clarity. Five minutes of de-cluttering. Five minutes of challenging myself. Five minutes of self-condemnation. Fie minutes of acceptance. Five minutes of purpose. Those five minutes were amongst the most full moments of my entire day.
In the stillness I found peace. Direction. My why. Next steps.
Honestly, it felt like an eternity before the last grain dropped. While incredibly uncomfortable, it felt profoundly soothing. I walked away with clarity, purpose, and direction. The stress and clutter was gone, only life lay ahead of me.
Day 3,019 – Glad I started writing earlier in the day! I’m exhausted and will be keeping it short tonight.
Growth:
Two related quotes which proved particularly useful today:
One cannot make a slave of a free person, for a free person is free even in prison.
Plato
Freedom lies not in external circumstances, freedom resides in the heart.
Anthony de Mello
Appreciation:
More of a second Growth section this evening, but very fitting as the pausing for awareness is something I am truly grateful for today.
So easy to react, more difficult to pause and reflect. Why was my initial response/reaction/emotion what it was? Where did I direct my frustration? How does my reaction change when I reflect it back to myself and remember that my response is due to MY choice rather than the external event itself?
In pausing to consider the quotes of the first section there was much growth. Rather than blame outside factors for my frustrations I realized it was I who was causing myself to get upset. When I dove deeper into why I was responding this way it quickly cleared up my thinking and helped me see the correct path forward.
Presence;
This evening Becky, Dominic, and I ate dinner and played games together. Throughout we talked and laughed. The time spent joking around was priceless!!! So much fun and joy in those moments of shared time together!
2024 started off with finishing up my most recent reading of Awareness by Anthony de Mello. One of the passages that really hit home for me was this as he talks about finding peace and awareness through becoming okay with being alone…
It will help, too, if you return to nature. Send the crowds away, go up to the mountains, and silently commune with the trees and flowers and animals ad birds, with sea and clouds and sky and stars. …Get back to nature, go up in the mountains. Then you will know that your heart has brought you to the vast desert of solitude, there is no one at your side, absolutely no one.
At first this will seem unbearable. But it is only because you are unaccustomed to aloneness. If you manage to stay there for a while, the desert will suddenly blossom into love. Your heart will burst into song. And it will be spring-time forever, the drug will be out, you’re free. Then you will understand what freedom is, what love is, what happiness is, what reality is, what truth is, what God is.”
Anthony de Mello, Awareness
From my backpacking experience last year I can start to understand what he means by this quote. Being alone in the woods, experiencing solitude, is magic for the soul.
Appreciation:
Vacations… ahh… one of my happy places and favorite activities! This evening I was working on a few details on planning one trip and then went down a bit of a rabbit hole cleaning out some old travel emails. That task somehow parlayed itself into digging into old vacation photos. While digging into the old photos I was reminded to pull some additional for a few different friends relating to trips and had the opportunity to re-live some of those past trips.
Some of the reading in Awareness tonight was focused on being present while on trips, not living behind the camera and only seeing the trip through the lens. I am grateful for the advice I got somewhere along the road about taking just enough photos to spark and clarify the memories, but not so much to miss the moment. It is a difficult balance, being present in the moment while also capturing just enough to re-live it over and over again and to maximize the memory dividend.
LOL – there I go again, drifting off on another vacation and travel related tangent! That’s exactly what I am thankful for this evening!
Presence:
While there were a handful of moments of presence throughout the day I’m going to kind of cheat and go back to last night. Gavin recommended Timeline by Michael Crichton a little over a year ago and it has been sitting on my nightstand ever since. Last night as I prepped for sleep I decided it was time to bust it out and give it a read. The next thing I knew almost an hour had passed and I was deep into the story.
What a gift it is to get lost in a wonderful book! When written well our minds can clearly picture all that is happening while also making connections to real life and piece together where the story may be going. Each page leads us further down the path, committing us more and more to the story. Today I’m grateful for those moments of presence while reading, I’m off to see if I can replicate it again!
Taking the time to track certain activities can take a little extra time, but it is often well worth it. For clarity, not everything needs to be tracked and logged, only what is most important to our dreams and goals. Also, we have to create time to pause and review those notes to determine how to best adapt and adjust our future actions to live better into our dreams.
As I pause and begin taking time to review 2023 I’m quickly seeing I should have carved out more time for this practice as it always seems to take longer than expected. This evening I started reviewing my reading list from 2023 and quickly caught myself drifting off to the major lessons learned throughout each book (both fiction and nonfiction). Taking time to go through the list of each book I read last year reminded me of so many things and I was surprised to see just how many pages I covered last year (61 books – down from 112 in 2022, but I felt much more balanced).
So much knowledge and wisdom can be drawn from reviewing the past year, but only if we track it. Here’s to doing more tracking and to living more closely into my dreams and goals in 2024!
Appreciation:
For the past handful of years (I think almost a decade or more) I’ve taken the week between Christmas and New Year off to spend time pausing from work. It initially started as a way to watch the boys as they didn’t have daycare & school available. Those days off created some pretty epic memories throughout the years. We’ve worked on projects, gone camping, played games, gone hiking, and have had so much bonus time together. I’m beyond appreciative for the time we’ve been able to share together!
Not only has that time off provided opportunities with the boys, but it has also given Becky and I an opportunity to hang out a little more too. Sometimes an afternoon off, a walk over lunch, and some extra time to head out to see our families.
This year I am also reminded of how grateful I am for the time I have to myself to pause and take a deep breath as I transition from one year to the next. Time to pause and reflect, plan, and reset. When I jump back into work I do so with a renewed fire and intensity as I’ve taken the time necessary to rest and prepare for the next push.
This time off is quickly coming to an end, I’ll be off to bed shortly after typing. As I reflect on it and think about all this time has provided my heart is full and I know I’ll be planning on this again next holiday season.
Presence:
This morning the combination of walking the dog, spending time in the woods, sharing time with family, AND drinking a hot cup of coffee on a chilly morning was magical! Our short-ish walk felt great, allowed time as a family to talk and relax, gave me a dose of fresh air, and was exactly long enough to let me start and finish my entire Yeti mug of coffee. Perfection to start the New Year!
Thankful for Forty 