Day 2,985

Growth:

How often in life have I witnessed this cycle repeat itself?

I start without knowledge and need direction, but the direction that is offered provides discomfort. I get frustrated with the person offering direction because they don’t understand where I am coming from. Ultimately, I learn and grow as a result of the discomfort.

Later, I attempt to help another who is without knowledge and needs direction, but the direction I offer them provides them discomfort. From my experience I understand that it is through this discomfort in which the learning and growth really occur. They get frustrated with me because they don’t understand where I am coming from. Ultimately, if they choose the path of discomfort they learn and grow as a result… and I learn and grow as a leader.

How simple it would be to trust the universe when we need help and direction and to follow blindly without hesitation knowing that others have already walked the path. How do I (and should I) work to break this cycle? Is this the way wisdom is meant to grow?

What’s interesting is that in this example, in this cycle, it seems as if the lessons learned as the student also help us to be a better teacher. We are able to see how the teacher didn’t connect well and do our best to change our strategy for our students, while also taking those moments in which our mentors were at their most magnanimous and replicating those experiences for others to learn – through us – from our mentors. It almost seems as if the cycle continues for a reason.

Here’s to the moments of discomfort which lead to growth as learners and to the learning we lead into from our mentors.

Appreciation:

This section has been a bit of a struggle for me tonight. I’ve got a couple of different paths to take so I think I’m going to punt and go with a short list rather than a single topic. That’s one of the nice things about this being my blog – my blog, my rules! 😉

• When I get an out of the blue piece of feedback on my book I’m left smiling from ear to ear for seemingly days. Especially after recording all 7+ hours of it into audio I feel somehow even more connected to it. Hearing that it is helping others and making a positive impact recharges my battery and reminds me that this is only the beginning!
• Funny how much time and energy are wasted in worrying about how something is going to go or what someone will think of an idea. Over the past 24 hours I’ve been reminded of this very clearly. I had an idea I was very excited for, but I was very nervous about how it would be received. As I labored over the nerves of the feedback of others I totally wasted energy that I shouldn’t have. When I rolled the idea out to them they we overwhelmingly in favor of it! I can be ridiculous sometimes, this was an excellent reminder of the gap between who I am and who I should be. Lesson learned.
• Everything is well. Seriously, everything is well. Yes, there is frustration, there are challenges, there are struggles, but all is well – we are still alive. This afternoon I was reminded of a period of time which was one of the most challenging of my professional career – we survived it and grew as a result of it! In the moment it really sucked, but we created something beautiful from it. Do not fear the possible discomfort, do the right thing, work through the challenge, and remember that all will be well. Once there is distance from the pain we can look back and see how we’ve grown and become better as a result. Avoiding the discomfort means avoiding growth.
• The book Outlive by Peter Attia is a MUST READ!!! I am reading it for the second time and am so thankful to be consuming it again!

And there’s more, but I think I’ll save it for later and let this all slowly sink into my brain.

Presence:

There’s a moment in which we become aware of something for the first time. An insight, a realization, an epiphany, a clear view unobstructed for the first time. In an instant our world is different. In that moment we are changed and cannot go back. There are many examples of this in Anthony de Mello’s profoundly insightful book, Awareness.

What I’ve noticed today is that when those moments hit, when we collide with clear vision and and thought, it is often either in or directly as a result of being in a very focused moment of presence. As I’ve been working this sentence I keep going back and forth on whether it is the result of presence in a moment or if the presence is instantly created as a result of moment of awareness. Does it even matter?

What’s beautiful is that the two are so married together – awareness and presence.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,984

Growth:

When you feel a nudge, heed the call. You’ll never regret the extra step of kindness taken and the results will often surprise you. Acting on nudges is where huge amounts of joy are created.

Appreciation:

When I started blogging almost three thousand days ago one of the basic rules I set for myself was to never repeat the same gratitude. I’m not 100% sure that I haven’t been thankful for this before, but if so it has been a long time and it is well worth repeating.

On one of my office walls I have a 4’x8′ white board. That canvas has been the site of so many ideas ranging from excellent to terrible, from inspiring to boring. Having the opportunity to get all my ideas out in one space to clarify a concept and then re-write, erase, edit, erase, and repeat over and over again is something I am hugely thankful for. My notebook is great, but there’s a time when I need the bigger visual, an easy to erase page, and a spot when I am not in the least bit nervous about making a mistake. My whiteboard is mental freedom.

Presence:

The moments of following through on a couple of nudges as referenced above brought tremendous levels of happiness, joy, and presence today. In each of those interactions I was 100% focused and was in a sublime flow state. So many ways the practice of recognizing others, connecting others, and helping others can elevate more lives than just our own.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,983

Growth:

Throughout the course of the day I often have those moments of insight from observing different conversations, interactions, and responses. Over the past year I’ve started taking the time to jot them down in the top margin of my notebook. As I’ve started looking back on some of the knowledge I’ve gleaned throughout the year this practice has become a concise catalog of life lessons to help me out in future scenarios. When I flip back through the previous pages I’m regularly reminded of those insights.

Appreciation:

The past month has not been kind to my yoga practice. For a variety of reasons I’ve been unable or unwilling to get to the studio to practice with anything resembling the regularity I prefer. This evening we got back on track and knocked out our first Monday night session in a long time… and it totally kicked my ass! All the stretching, twisting, and pulling felt amazing!!! I’m totally feeling wasted right now, worn out and feeling muscles I haven’t noticed in a while. Getting the energy out while getting a workout in like that AND getting into a calm state of mind was AWESOME!!!

Presence:

This morning the large full moon slowly slipped down across the sky while continuing to increase in size while simultaneously dimming in the same ratio. When I slid further into the valley and the moon was swallowed up by the bluffs the sun lit up a brilliant golden orange blaze opposite the moon. I was then treated to a spectacular view of the sunrise until it rose and slowly dimmed as the moon had. Once the sun was behind the bluffs I curved along the road and caught sight of the full moon again, slowly ambling towards the horizon in a race to disappear before fading away. All of this played out around me on my drive, a drive in total silence, a drive focused on the show nature was putting on all around me.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,982

Growth:

Something about today really had me dialed in from the standpoint of presence. As I think ahead to what I’ll write about tonight I’m torn between several (& will likely use them all shortly). There were more moments of focused presence than I’ve had in a while. Not sure what the magic was but I’ll definitely keep thinking on this.

Appreciation:

Something I’ve really started to appreciate more and more is the way we balance out our time as a family. Over the past couple of years (maybe more) we still spend a majority of our time together, but we also split into triads and twos of all combinations with some level of regularity. It seems as if this time in the smaller group helps all of us with our relationships with the rest of the family. It seems counterintuitive to building family dynamics, but that focused time with a smaller segment seems to allow us to get to know each other better and more deeply rather than having the gravitational force of our normal whole family dynamics pull us where we always go. Not sure how or why it started but it seems to be working well!

Presence:

Whew!!! Where do I start today? As I’ve already said, there were many moments of focused presence today! Here are some of the more memorable which come to mind,

• Walking in a winter wonderland in the woods with a coffee in my hand while hiking with Becky and Leia.
• Seeing a woodpecker only yards away on a tree going to town on the bark.
• Enjoying the sight of the hunter retrieving ducks amongst his decoys.
• So many smiles as I greeted at church this morning.
• Joking with Becky while putting up Christmas lights.
• Seeing the huge full moon rise slowly as we took Leia on her second walk.
• Watching tundra swans fly in a large V over our house.
• Eating dinner as a complete family.
• Getting one last hug from Dominic before he went into the train station.
• Riding home with Gavin while he practiced driving on the ice for the first time.
• The quiet calm of typing this blog.

So many engaging moments of presence today!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,981

Growth:

When viewed correctly and the worked on with an action plan rejection is only a speed bump on the road to success. Learn from it, react to it, and keep moving forward.

Appreciation:

Dominic may be in college but we’re still holding onto traditions like cutting down the Christmas tree together. Today Leia joined us for her first time. We also got to see Gavin cut the tree most of the way and the Dominic threw a rugby tackle at it and knocked it down! So much fun finding those moments and enjoying our family traditions.

Presence:

This afternoon the boys went outside and threw the football and rugby ball around in the park across the street. Watching the two of them enjoy some brother time like that was totally heartwarming! I am so appreciative of those moments when I have the opportunity to experience the two of them together like that.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,980

Growth:

There’s never quite enough time to get everything done that I will want to get done. Consider what is most important, create a prioritization of what must be done first, and then have the discipline to complete those tasks first prior to moving on to the next. Remember that it will never ALL be done, I will have to say NO to some things in order to make time for the most important things. Prioritize, but know what is most important first. Learn to be more okay with not being able to do it all, maybe even find a way to turn saying no to things into a game to help stay focused on accepting that.

Today I wanted to get it all done, then I realized I could only get some done, and in the end I was actually able to complete even less… and that’s okay.

Appreciation:

Becky and Gavin are home from France and Dominic is home from school – our family is complete at home again!!! This evening we ate as a family, went through vacation pictures as a family, and joked around and enjoyed time as a family. After having a very quiet house for the better part of a week it was such a welcome change of pace to have every family member home and engaged.

As a bonus – I am beyond glowing due to the spectacular time Becky and Gavin had in France!!! So appreciative for the experiences they shared and the memories they were able to create together. The smiles and joy they had on their faces all night were priceless and reminders to me of how important it is for us to have family time as a full family AND to have family time one on one with each other in order to help grow and strengthen our individual bonds along with the entire family. This time around it was Becky and Gavin enjoying life in Europe together and seeing deeply meaningful pieces of history and culture together. Based on their first round of stories they had an awesome time! Their smiles were priceless!!!

Presence:

Dominic and I had quite the conversation about both science and leadership this morning on our drive back to La Crosse! He was filling me in on what was going on in his classes and it was intriguing to dive into the concepts he was learning in his Leadership class – all very much related to my work life for sure. As he filled me in on things like the VASE theory (Visualize, Assess, Strategize, Execute) and how they were learning strengths based leading through utilization of personality and strength assessments we dove into in depth conversation on actual application and additional resources he may find interesting. We also dove into concepts like making sure the true argument was being understood in order to debate the right way (our conversation on over population AND declining birthrate was a fun one!). All in all it was a very focused and presence driven conversation, totally engaging!

Thanks!!!

Day 2,979

Growth:

I’m grateful for remembering to give myself grace in my gratitude practice. Tonight I am keeping the writing short as I stayed up later with family. I’m still reflecting on the day and focusing on gratitude, but in a more condensed manner. Purpose over form 👍

Appreciation:

I probably sound like a broken record, but my one on one time with Dominic today was priceless. Having bonus drive time led to so many awesomely nondescript conversations and I enjoyed all of them tremendously!

Presence:

So many laughs with family today for Thanksgiving!!! We played games and shot the bull, so thankful for our time together.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,978

Growth:

Some of the best and most heartfelt traditions live on for generations and create a ton of joy and smiles year after year after year. Here’s to two of my mentors for creating a Thanksgiving tradition that still continues well over 30 years later. What an awesomely positive impact they’ve had on so many through their generosity, giving, and love!

Appreciation:

Dominic and I had put together the backbone of our trip to Patagonia in March, today we started to flesh out all the details. In many ways the construction of a vacation is so similar to a woodworking project. Start with an idea, get the structure built, and then fill in al the details and character. As with any project – it is guaranteed to not go exactly as planned and that’s all good too. We’ll adapt, adjust, and make the best of any curveballs we get thrown our way. Seeing the details start to take shape has me sooooooo excited!

Presence:

Hanging out with Dominic today was the highlight of my day! We got a bunch of time together from the point I picked him up from the train station until just about supper time. It was just the two of us (& Leia) and we talked about fun stuff, school stuff, and vacation stuff. Having that bonus one on one time was heartwarming and I’m looking forward to more of that over the next couple of days.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,977

Growth:

Honest and constructive feedback is so awesome and greatly appreciated!!! Huge shout out to my buddy Rick for pointing out a great way to improve the quality of my audiobook recording today! His idea helped a ton and in more ways than I expected! It was a very insightful reminder of how helpful it is to share ideas with someone to help them improve. Thanks for the inspiration dude!!!

Appreciation:

The recording is now done. I’d set a goal of recording the entirety of my book while Gavin and Becky were in France and I’ve now accomplished that goal. The sense of accomplishment is tremendous! There’s still so much work ahead including editing, possibly re-recording sections, and setting up the files to upload, but the heaviest of the lifting is now complete. There are now approximately 7 hours of recordings done. Whew – I am feeling it! Both emotionally and physically I am feeling exhausted, but it is the exhaustion of hard work being completed, and the goal being done!

Bring on the extra work, all the stuff that will take a ton of time, and the next steps – that’s all good. Today I’m grateful for setting a big goal and knocking it out!

Presence:

Wowza, recording my book for audio was rough in the best possible ways. Re-living so many difficult moments brought back so many feels, but largely they were all good – just very intense. Spending the better part of two days reading my book into a microphone re-opened the chest of memories I’d packed away a while ago and hadn’t opened this completely for a long time. That said, what a profound way to remind me of the why behind this project! Getting lost in those memories while recording in a tiny little dark space was wild. Though the work seems like it should have been rather mundane I caught myself being in a flow state almost the entire time.

Thanks!!!

Day 2,976

Growth:

Today I’ve learned that there is reading and then there is READING. I love reading! Picking up a good book, taking it all in, and enjoying the written word – all so chill and calming. Today I was READING as I’ve started recording the audio version of my book and it was an entirely different experience.

When READING I have to take the time to notice each and every word. I can’t help but be more focused on all the detail as I am not only reading it, but I am preparing to speak it. This also means digesting it on a different level as I need to read it as I would speak it rather than just reading it. These two additional steps really make a giant leap from reading to READING.

What’s really getting me thinking is how differently I am taking in this information this time around. How much different would my comprehension be if I read everything aloud as if I were recording an audiobook? I wouldn’t read nearly as fast, but I’d imagine my understanding of the book would be increased tremendously. Definitely something to consider for the future!

Appreciation:

In order to have quiet to record I brought Leia to doggy daycare for the first time of her life. To say she enjoyed it would be a huge understatement! Here’s what she looked like on the way home and shortly after getting home:

This has been the quietest night I’ve had since Becky and Gavin left, no question! She even put herself to bed a little before 6:30pm. Can’t wait to see how worn out she is after going again tomorrow!

Presence:

This morning I was blessed with an inspiring gift, the opportunity to join friends at the courthouse to see the adoption of their son become legally completed. The details are theirs to share – what I am grateful for is the presence of the moment that it was official. There was so much love and joy in that courtroom from so many, it was a special moment I will cherish forever.

Thanks!!!