Day 2,828 (written on Sunday, June 25)

Growth:

Funny how our brains operate when our distractions are removed and we’re left with our own thoughts.  There’s a liberating feel when I start off alone and without distraction, but it quickly becomes a bit uncomfortable.  It’s almost as if I live in such a state of action that my brain almost short circuits when I’ve got time to pause.  

My backpacking trip has started off well but is eerily similar to my hermitage trip, just as I’d assumed yesterday.  Even with that being the case I thought I’d be able to handle it better thanks to that recent experience.  Alas, I am right back where I was then.  

I am uncomfortably alone.  The distractions I would normally use to keep my brain occupied with anything but aloneness are not here.  It is just me in the woods.  I am enjoying and taking in all the sights, smells, and sounds, but I am alone.

Didn’t Dr Seuss write about becoming comfortable being alone in Oh, the Places You’ll Go?  He was definitely on to something!

So tonight I am uncomfortably alone.  Tomorrow I’ll likely already be feeling much more comfortable in my own skin alone.  Discomfort is where we have the opportunity to grow, that’s what I’ll be doing.

Appreciation:

I’m really glad I clarified the goal I am hoping to achieve this week.  I initially was going to say a solo backpacking trip but I added in “for at least three nights” as a qualifier.  

When I was almost to my camp today I started talking with myself about how good I was feeling and how I should just continue up the trail and knock this entire 30 miles out in two days (one night) instead.  Why not?  I’ve done longer than that in two days before.

That’s when I smiled and reminded myself that I wanted this to be an uncomfortable experience, one in which I would have more time than I needed with no one else with and with nothing else to do other than spend time alone in the woods.  The purpose wasn’t just to hike a trail and call it good, there was a lot more to it.

I’m grateful for clarifying my dream to remind of the purpose as it saved me from myself today!

Presence:

Spending the sunrise all alone at Lake of the Clouds was so serene and surreal at the same time.  Every time I’ve been at the overlook there’s always been at least a few people, usually a small crowd.  This morning it was only me.

It was wild being able to enjoy the awesome sight of the lake ringed by hills with mist slowly rising up from the forest with a complete lack of human sound nearby.  My mind quickly went to understanding how this was a special place to the indigenous people of this area.  

As if it weren’t already beautiful enough a bald eagle soared across the view.   

Thanks!!!